A Nagging Need

Hello WA!

For the past year I have been less and less inclined to do anything more than minimal work online. It all started with moving in Oct. 2012. My 91yo mom does not want to leave her house and is simply too old and infirm to be by herself. A woman,(who lived with us 40 years ago as a foster child) showed up after all that time and needed a place to live. I didn't think it was a good idea because she is a drug addict (of the worst kind) but my bleeding heart brother told her she could move in with mom. Well, suffice to say any scenario you can conjure up pretty much happened as a result - from her being a drunken/drugged out complete mess yelling at mom to stealing from her. I was waiting for my predictions to play out and my brother to do the dirty work of getting rid of her. It took him a few months but he finally did it. In the meantime, Mom would call and I would come to her aid (my brother lives in Germany so easy for him to make this decision). Why didn't I get rid of her...it's a sibling thing...

So, come Oct 2012, I moved in with mom. Thank God we get along, but for me it's like having a kid. It really crunched my time for a while between moving and setting myself up in her house and taking care of her and working my own business offline (professional organizing). Bottom line, I got out of the habit of learning, reading, working on sites, writing posts, and socializing, which took the worst hit and is my deepest regret. The lack of connection really shows how out of touch I have become with my friends here (as well as my rank but I know I can get that back - Hoping I can get the friends back as well.)

Okay, so why all this sharing? Because I need some oversight. I need helping getting back and staying on track. I feel like by the time I have any time left for myself on any given day, I'm too tired to sit at a computer and think. (I'm no spring chicken but am a bundle of energy during the day...just have little to no energy left in the evenings we're talking after 8 p.m.) Before my move, I could devote 12-16 hours to online work on a day "off". Now, there are no days off. My daily schedule changes week to week depending client needs and then there's taking care of mom every day. So I think it's time for a lifestyle lift.

That means finding time to regularly devote to online endeavors and using that time in the most efficient and effective way possible. It means getting back on track by combing the trainings to re-learn and learn new, and it means not being put off by the mental obstacle that tells me I have so much catching up to do and so precious little time it's daunting. I need to learn to work fast and smart given that I do not have big chunks of time any more.

When I was socializing here and other places with WA member groups outside of WA, I felt like I was on a roll and it all had to do with the support of WA members. You all are the best group of people on the net. I haven't visited WA much in all this time. Here and there for definite purposes but only a handful of times to connect with people. Despite that, some members have helped me thru some tech trouble and I am eternally grateful that they are always there and always helpful.

I need to come here every day and work - on my; sites, trainings, writing, posting, chatting, but mostly working. I need to set goals and focus. I have ideas to implement and lots of work to do.

Thus, I Need a Nag! At least one...possibly more...hahahaha

Seriously though, I really need people to help pull me back in and get me going, motivated, and moving forward. I can feel how close it is but I also hear that nasty little voice persuading me that it's all too much. I know the hardest part of writing is the first line...that blank page stares back at you without giving any incentive or support. I think that's where I'm at with my online tasks. Blogger's Block.

I don't blame anyone for not reading this whole thing... have been wanting to get this out for a while. Thanks for reading if you got this far and for any support you give me.