FEAR OF FAILURE, who is that monster lurking?
Failure, that is one heavy topic! Are we afraid of failure, or is it success we fear? Deciding we want to begin our online business, we have to face our fears.
ESCORT THAT FEAR MONSTER OUT OF OUR HEADS!
Remember as children we often asked our parents to check under the bed or in the closet for the lurking monster? Sometimes I wonder do we still have that monster in our shadows? And if so, how do we as adults find the way to just ask it to just leave?
When I started doing this online business, I really felt that I had to address this illusive subject. I did not want to even think there still existed this monster of the night.
Then one day while I was writing, I felt it! I looked around not quite understanding what it was. And not afraid to talk to myself, grin, I politely said whom ever you are you may leave now. But somehow that shadow just decided to camp out. I told it I would not make it a cup of tea!
I really had to look at it. What I found was not pretty. If you know this story, just smile as you follow along!
It showed itself as a sense of heaviness in my chest and a tingling in my neck. Oh yeah, that watch out there is a bear nearby, alert. OK, I hear you. What is it that you want to talk about?
Well first off, why would you start a new business? You know there is failure rate. Oh and do you really think you are bright enough to understand all this technical stuff? And will you really be determined enough to not stop even when you are exhausted and not seeing immediate results?
Nope, said my fear, you will probably just fold and say, maybe that wasn't for me.
Really? You, my dear monster think you are the boss of me?
Nope, think again.
RE-SEARCH
That began my internal reset and re- search. What is it about my sense of work and ethics that would drive me to not accept failure?
Determination
Stick to it-ness
Setting goals
Daily and weekly affirmations
Acknowledging daily small successes
A bag of potato chips, (we all need rewards.)
LOOKING AT THE OUTCOME
At this point in my life, having overcome odds of even being capable to think, my level of 'why not" was really strong. I have absolutely everything to gain. There is no loss here. I already have gained so much knowledge, I could teach a course in building a website!
If I don't make one million dollars in 15 days, I am old enough to know that instant gratification is not the building of true infrastructure. To me, just the doing, not just the outcome, itself becomes an adventure. I am turning a new page in my life. Can you see me holding the reins to my new journey? Can you see yourself doing the same?
I AM WORTHY
Arghhh, did she really have to go there? So it seems that being worthy has the seesaw effect of up and downs. We see ourselves as possibility on either end. Possible failure. Possible success. And both are true. What did Henry Ford say; If you believe you can, if you believe you cannot, both are true.
That says a lot. So if I choose to be the CEO of my own Ariel Universe, then it is my responsibility to say I am stepping up to take full responsibility. Ahh, that is so grown-up. Give me a break!
What is the new term "adulting"?
There it is. I am indeed worthy of being successful. Because simply put, I think I can, no matter what anyone else believes. Here is another true gem that I have come to terms with. Whatever anyone else thinks about my process, has absolutely no bearing on me. It is their opinion. It is not mine. I can just politely say, thank you. And know it does not belong in my sphere.
As long as I truly believe in my success, I can see it, feel it, create it. And then I live it day by day, moment by moment. I make that commitment to myself that my goals count. My drive counts. My can do it, counts.
And then, here is my testament to myself. I stick to it to show myself that indeed I am worthy. Yup, I am going to inspire myself. I am the inspiration I am seeking.
By doing so I am creating new neuro-pathways that provide infrastructure to success. Yup, for real. Doing something consistently and new, creates a stronger brain.
ARE YOU READY to say: yes we can?
Being ready to take on a new adventure is life changing. It means restructuring our world. From the moment we awaken, to our working 12 hours, until we realize our hands are cramped.
When we are ready to say yes to our new online business, the joy shows itself in our own self radiating. It's a new-found way to express and show who we truly are. My vehicle to success is Wealthy Affiliates.
And wow, I have to tell you, failure is not going to feed this new happy monster. My new monster is more like my totem animal. I can count on it to show me strength and continuance. It is the guide to my new path of success.
Name your new adventure monster, it will help your forge this amazing new path.
I would love to hear how you have tamed your inner monster. So add comments below. Don't forget, the light is so illuminatingly stronger after we drop the fear!
ariel
Recent Comments
48
Hi, Ariel. Wow, what a great post. I don't usually take a lot of time to read most of the posts I get notifications for but, I sure glad I took the time to read yours.
This is truely me. I have felt that heaviness in my chest or a weight on my shoulders. It's not so much a physical kind of weight, more like a pressure that comes from outside, kind of like lethargy.
Am I making sense?
I have felt that way for some time especially concerning my first website.
When I started this journey almost two years ago I was excited and full of anticipation and I thought I had the support of my wife but I don't think she was as "on board" as I thought
Recently, I started a new site to promote WA and I am determined to make this work. I still feel that sense of anxiety but I'm trying not to let it hold me back.
Part of me feels that I have to prove to my wife that this can work.
Your post says it all. I think it's fear of failure. And you're right, most, including myself, don't feel like we are worthy.
Do you ever wish there was a switch that we could flick? IT'S A MONSTER INDEED.
Hello Wayne!
Thank you so much for reading this..and sharing your experience...I think its so true that it does not work if we are doing it for someone else..
When I took this step it was for me. To inspire myself that indeed I have options. So it might work for you to determine what you want from this..Its about you!
And determination comes from deep inside..it is not an ego thing of I will show you..it is I will show me...lol..
So prove it to yourself!
Fear of failure just means we are one step closer to success..yes?
I know you have this..and I will be looking forward to how well you do. Thriving is now! ariel
They are really going to have to install a LOVE IT button on here to click~ That was so inspiring, as all of your writings are! I'm having to face my monsters now as well...baby steps again!
Have a blessed day!
Tammy
You, Ariel, are a very inspiring woman :o). It's so funny, in an odd way, that we all think this only happens to us as an individual - only to find out that truly we are all the same, but still different.
I do believe a lot of people are afraid of success rather than failure. Maybe because they truly don't know what they'd do with it. I'm not sure we will ever know that answer.
To conquer success, one must defeat fear, and that is not the most easiest thing to do.
Thanks so much for a wonderful post.
Hello Paula, as are you! thank you! I know, we somehow have to admit we are all so very human..lol..
That is a great thought, i don't think we are ever taught how to be successful. we learned how to follow but not how to lead..or lead ourselves..so it makes sense that fear of failure and success is on the table.
i hear you! But one step at a time..we can do anything..yes?
thanks for being here, ariel
Think about fear as an emotion. When we do that we can control everything and stop the pointless worry.
Also knowing that each step we take is the most important step, we learn that living each moment to learn and move one step at a time becomes the only goal that matters to us.
Don't look back because it's too late and never guess what is far ahead because we can't foresee all the obstacles.
Learned helplessness, Mr Kearns. It has been on the rise for the past 20 years. Young people have become lost; they have lack of guidance on which direction to go in life. This has created the "lazy and lethargic" mode. They've simply or nearly given up.
From my perspective, I think it started long before then. I think it started as far back as the late 60's early 70's. A lot of stuff was happening back then.
The "hippie" movement, taking the Bible out of school, free love, drugs, LSD, and all that. There was a lot of confusion way back then and no one really understood it.
At first, it was subtle but it has continued to grow and I don't think many see it for what it truly is.
Call me crazy but, there is a darker side to what's going on in our world.
Oh I'm sure it started long before then.
That "crazy" part about a darker side is not "crazy" at all. :o)
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When I read your blog Ariel, I am reminded of two things. The first is the story of the little engine, going up the hill and the second is the movie "Apollo 13," where there is a line "failure is not an option."
Thanks for scaring away the monster under the bed. Great blog.
Thanks for sharing that Harvey! I am happy to be of service..lol
best wishes, ariel