Leaving comments on niches for men or women only
Two of my niches are targeted specifically for women. This is common for niches, particularly narrow ones.
There is increasing conflict between this fact, and the comments I receive through the site comment engine.
As a reminder, for these comments, we have to provide two to get one. We are paying for these comments. And too often my comments are from men, and too often they are irrelevant, bad, or just realllllly a stretch.
I'm not the only WA member with a niche focused on one gender. And I'm not the only one experiencing an overflow of comments from the wrong target audience.
I've already reached out to Kyle with suggestions. He said there were improvements slated for the comments engine, but there are TONS of other higher priority improvements. So it'll be awhile.
Men: if you are going to comment on shopping & product review category niches that are specifically and OBVIOUSLY for women, create a female alias, slap a woman's picture on gravatar, and pretend to be female.
No more of this "my wife" or "my niece" nonsense. Would you actually leave a comment on a random website about how you'd like to buy a reviewed dress or pair of shoes or a handbag for your wife or daughter? No. You'd just buy it. It's totally unbelievable.
Same for women: if we're going to be commenting on a men's only site (like a shaving or testosterone supplement or male self confidence site), let's all create male aliases and impersonate dudes. It's only fair.
Doing this will reduce all of our wasted time by a whole lot, and we can focus on the more important stuff.
I've been playing along with "my wife" and "my niece" for long enough, and I will reject comments from men on these sites unless they are extraordinarily believable or good.
I know that we all want to help each other, and that's nice, it really is. But quality matters. Our sites look spammy and shitty if the comments all smell fake.
Recent Comments
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Hi there
Well done and well said
Its all about balance here, I guess
Thanks for posting
Cheers.PB
I understand, I would like a choose for language as well, I have Dutch websites with mostly English comments, and I find that unnatural too
I was leaving site comments last evening and one that was generated for me to comment on was in Spanish. Not a good choice as I don't speak or read Spanish. I do think a language filter is needed.
This is a hot topic, I shall say. The thing is, at first we are all oh so excited that we GOT A COMMENT, but then we're like...um, wait, what was that? do I need it? then we start analyzing the content of the comments we receive. Well, just by reading the messages on this blog, I found out that I can edit the incoming comments. That's a very nice option.
My site is very gender oriented (fashion for preteen girls), and therefore "I wish I had a daughter to spoil" don't really add credibility to my new site. I need to stop being greedy for comments and filter them better.
I do too refuse to comment if an article doesn't interest me or I have no idea what the whole thing is about. I believe over time the issue will be either solved by Kyle and Carson, or we'll simply develop a "culture" of not commenting on sites that clearly target the opposite gender audience or we simply don't know what to say. The problem with rejecting a comment is that - you have already "paid" for it with your two credits. Credits, that you earned by writing 2 (!) other comments, and by doing so you spend your precious time (my time IS VERY precious since I don't have whole lot of it).
Just sayin..
Katya.
thanks for weighing in, Katya! Good to have your perspective here, it's extremely relevant.
I do hope this post helps promote a culture of not commenting when it's clear the blog may not be for us - the better we get at this, the less we waste our time, and everyone else's time!
You are right; There is very little help for you if the comments are generic but slanted the wrong way
So, if I went to your site about girl things and bought one for my niece that's o.k.. THEN if I left a comment only to compliment the site and how convenient of having your site for me to find girl (women) things then that's o.k. Right ?.........Scotty B ♪
Well, in WA, I don't think we expect each other to buy each other's stuff. I mean, it's nice if it happens - and it does happen sometimes. I bought supplements from someone, once.
The overriding point is that the comment needs to be believable.
And, do men (excluding crossdressers and fashion designers) really comment on women's fashion blogs in the real world? If they do, I will shut up.
If I see a woman's niche I don't comment on it. I'm struggling to understand why any man would want to.
YOU WOULD BE ABSOLUTELY AMAZED at how often it happens. In fact, right now, I'm going to count all of my comments on the two female niche pages and give you the raw numbers.
ha ha okay Stephanie. I've done it before, but only when requested. It's not easy and you have to really think why you would be commenting.
Female hair loss - a hair loss site for women:
38 total received
20 from men
stylish apples - a clothing site for women:
42 total received
14 from men
When I started, I know I left a few comments on men-only sites because I thought I might be penalized for the "I'm not interested" button, which isn't true.
My only thought is maybe other men feel the same way?
Or perhaps they think my niche is "easy" to comment on and therefore select it instead of something else?
It would be one thing if guys were like: "So, I know I'm a guy and this is a site just for women, but I've USED THIS PRODUCT and wanted to tell you about my experience."
Or even "So, I know I'm a guy and this site is for women, but I'M A FASHION DESIGNER or A ROLLY POLLY CROSSDRESSER, and therefore have informed opinions about this topic."
You're not alone. I disapprove more than 50% of comments because they are irrelevant or no thought has been put into them. People have to understand that you arrived at this post from a search engine or because you were interested in the product. I get comments on TV boxes like "I don't really watch TV but this box looks good, what does it do?"
It's tedious.
Holy guacamole, you reject more than 50% of the comments? And there's no penalty? I had no idea that was possible...or, possible without consequence.
Do you ever do what Eddy suggested, and just edit them up to snuff?
I only do an occasional edit if it's a typo or something. I don't enjoy rejecting them but they just look daft if they're not relevant. Your site has to look real, people really read the comments. I know because I have a recording plugin on my site.
Daft. That's a great word, and underused.
You're making me wonder whether I need a purge. It's tough because, with new sites, we want these comments - really, we want them enough to write two of them to get one. We want our sites ranking yesterday, already!
All of these factors contribute to how quickly, and how extensively, we'll make money with these businesses.
I would just leave the comments Stephanie but maybe be a bit more selective from now on. Aye...daft.....we use that word in Scotland a lot :-)
OMG I'm so jealous. I live in Korea and it's impossible to find Scotch whisky at reasonable prices...it's all marked WAY up. My husband and I have been rationing our two precious bottles of Laphroiag.
Wow you're in Korea, I'm in Malaysia. I haven't lived in Scotland since 1997 although I've been back many times. Last time was 3 years ago. We can get whisky here but it's expensive too.
I LOVE Malaysia! Went to Georgetown for a week in February..it was spectacular, definitely wanna go back. the food is unlike anything else. how livable is it, as a westerner? We noticed they have an attractive gov't incentive program for retirees.
It's in my comment history that I was given the opportunity to comment on Stylish Apples and it was disapproved and that made the point that I cannot leave a comment anymore.
I cannot remember what I've written there because I can no longer access so I don't know how bad is my opinion on the product to be reviewed. I may have given a general comment on the site or I may have taken another article rather than what is presented.
If you can retrieve my comment and present it as an example for us to learn here, I am willing to be exposed in my mediocrity in commenting.
Hi Jimmy, thanks for stepping up. I can definitely post your comment here and explain why I didn't approve it.
Worth nothing: your comment WAS NOT bad in the way that I identified in this blog post - I mean, you didn't impersonate someone shopping for his wife or niece.
The article was about fashion tips for women who are both plus-sized, and have apple shaped figures.
this was the comment:
"Body shapes fit anything and everything. There is always a remedy for every problem. It's just finding what can be done in a situation where we are in. So anybody should not worry about body size, body figure or shape because nothing in this world can be a big issue with the human ingenuity. Like this site, it's creative, it offers solutions to women who really want to impress the public that they can show their beauty rather than to hide it."
I rejected this comment because it didn't make a lot of sense to me - on the one hand, you said that body shapes don't matter, and on the other hand, they are a problem to be solved.
I didn't think the comment would make sense to other readers, and that it sounded a bit forced and full of business-y language.
And I don't agree with either idea that body shapes don't matter, and that they are a problem to be solved.
What does everyone else think? Was this an instance where I should have just edited the comment, or had a more open mind?
One takeaway - we all need to be pressing the "I'm not interested" button way more often, when coming across articles that are clearly not targeted to us, or out of our scope of interest.
Thank you for bringing in my comment.
"The article was about fashion tips for women who are both plus-sized, and have apple shaped figures."
I see the site talks about fashion, about dresses that fit any size of the body. It is not about belly fat lose and that's what I am trying to affirm in my comment.
Impliedly, the site is saying there is no problem with your body there is a solution and it invites women of different body size to find the best dress for that body.
Am I not right?
Note: To the WA community, this is just how we learn to see things and make it right. Please join us.
Sort of right - the site is for women with one specific body type. The clothes I recommend are targeted to women with that one specific body type.
Some of the recommendations will apply to other body types, of course.
And one of my "messages" is that our bodies aren't the problem, but we do have choices when it comes to looking our best.
What I'm wondering is do you have an interest in women's fashion, or if you contemplated hitting the "I'm not interested" button. It would be really helpful if you could pull us into your mindset when you were leaving the comment. It's ok to be honest!
Hahaha, I don't know if any site presented to anyone is directed to a specific gender or sex. To me, any site that comes to me for comment, I take it and have the opportunity.
I'm not a woman, I'm a man and I don't have any doubt of my identity. The fact is that I am an advocate of the LGBT for after all we are all humans.
Yup, I didn't mean ANY of this to come off as a personal attack, only an opportunity to learn. I also support LGBT rights.
To see if a niche is focused to women or men, I'd say take a minute and look. In some cases, that information will be immediately obvious. For my hair loss site, it's in the URL.
The broader situation here on WA is that people are receiving comments through the comment engine that they can't use.
In my case, I'm suggesting this results from gender mismatch.
Now, trying to brainstorm ways to make it better for everyone.
In the case of gender, I'd say maybe we should have more filters in the comment engine.
Until and if that happens, more people need to pick "I'm not interested" when leaving comments, and more people need to disapprove or reject comments when receiving them.
My sites aren't gender specific and I experience crappy comments as well. But I simply reject or edit them depending on how bad they are. So you do have control over that. That said yes there is room for improvement. But we have to keep in mind that is a powerful benefit of being part of WA that has helped many of us rank well.
So even with the flaws you laid out overall this comment tool has been very helpful to new sites. But I definitely feel your frustration and deal with it as well in other ways. But thank goodness for that reject button because I use it regularly if the comments aren't up to snuff. But trust that Kyle and Carson will get to it. But there are working on some things that are really going to help us all grow our businesses.
thanks for the comment, Eddy...and sorry to hear it happens to you, too. Can I ask how often, and how dramatically, do you edit the comments? Do you re-write them altogether?
You're welcome. I don't do it alot. Most of the time it's to correct some spelling or grammar. But I'm not re-writing a whole comment. I just delete it and a good one usually follows. Again the system is not perfect. Once a site establishes itself and starts ranking you'll get natural comments. I do. I just like making use of the site comment because it's a nice jump start.
good to hear that, I'm unlikely to take extreme editorial license with comments in the future, just delete and get another.
Yeah, the site engine is a sure thing, which is why I use it. I do have some exchange buddies here which is great, and am trying to cultivate more.
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I encountered the case once. It was such a painful experience when I turned on the mode of auto-approving comments. But I then realize that folks have different levels of perception, and I am no one to ask them to improve. So the best things I should do to enhance my site's management: disable auto-approving option, hire a virtual assistant to go through comments and continue to learn from other great sites. I hope you will find out solutions for your case.