How Should We Deal With Requests to Mentor?
I am sure this is a common issue but it is becoming so frequent that I thought I should write a post about it here. I am getting many requests to "mentor" brand new members. I am sure this request is common for Ambassadors and higher ranked members. Perhaps other members can share their experience with this issue and suggestions of how to handle it? Maybe we can come up with a good answer together. I wish I could help everyone but I simply don't have enough time and they need to learn to follow the steps themselves to be successful.
I am honored that people are asking me to be their mentor but I simply don't have time to do so. I am getting many such requests lately from brand new members. I don't know if they all read something somewhere telling them to get a mentor or if they just think it is good place to start when they are new and feeling overwhelmed.
It certainly makes sense to ask someone to help you with something new. I get it. It also feels like a bit of a shortcut however. They may not want to do the work themselves so instead of doing the training they ask someone they think is successful to help them. That is an honor as I stated above but I cannot spend all my time mentoring new members. I barely manage to keep the job I have and struggle to work on my own websites.
I am never sure if I should nicely point them toward the training (which I usually do) or suggest they contact their referrer or offer to answer specific questions. In the most recent case I got yet another email from a new member I have never seen before asking me to mentor them. On his profile I see where he already had an exchange with his referrer. Therefore, it is not a situation where he does not know who his referrer is. She told him to follow the training however and I am guessing he wants a shortcut. They just pop up out of the blue. Random emails requesting my help but not asking any specific questions.
That is the crux of the whole problem. They are not asking specific questions. Every time someone has asked me a specific question I have answered it. If you just want to ask for general mentoring without doing anything yourself however, you probably won't succeed here. I am always happy to help out where I can but people need to do the basics and get started themselves. If they have already interacted with their referrer and the referrer has told them to get started with the training then they might just be looking for an easy boost in my opinion.
So have you received requests to mentor someone new? Do you get many of these requests? How do you respond? How do you think we should respond? I hate to sound rude or uncaring.
Thanks for your input.
Jessica
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Granted I'm new here, and I don't have any experiences with anyone asking me to mentor them. I do however have several (15+) years of experience with people asking me for tech help. My recommendation due to that would be to post something along the lines of "Prior to asking me to mentor you please do the following: 1) Go through the training. 2) Ask your sponsor/the community. 3) Use the search functionality." I use a similar style for people asking me for technical help, to point them to the resources to resolve the issue themselves where possible. If they still can't resolve it, then they follow up with me.
Exactly. I realized while writing this that I need to come up with a standardized response like that.
Thank you.
I just refer all my mentoring requests straight to you - would you like me to start sending them elsewhere?
Kidding! Hopefully you'll not unfollow me for that.
Seriously though, I'm yet to receive any such requests, but can understand the issues. I think that while some people use the lure of mentorship to help gain subscribers, most people on here are far too busy to make such a big committment.
Also, I fully agree that far too many people are not willing to actually follow the training before asking for help - every day you see such requests from people who have obviously made little or no effort. Maybe they are still searching for that "magic button" that most of us now know doesn't exist.
I firmly believe that you should politely turn down such requests and just help out in the Live Chat and various Discussions as and when you are able, as you always do.
I know it can be difficult turning people away, but unfortunately there are times when you have no alternative.
Don't lose any sleep over it, Jessica - there are only 24 hours in a day.
Thanks Steve. I feel like I am being selfish saying no but there is really no way to keep up! I am getting several of these requests per week now.
I agree. We see these new people often in Chat where they have not looked at the training but just want to find someone to hold their hand so they don't have to.
I just point them towards the member who referred them. If they don't have one, I just direct them towards the community and to the training. Encourage them and be polite and they'll thank you for replying. :)
Yes, I just need to not worry about saying no so much I guess. Directing them to the training, search bar, classrooms etc. is the only real answer.
Nicely explain to them that for people that are not your referrals, that you have to charge $65 per hour, or what ever that rate might be.
Of course, you can then provide a link to the training.
You are not being uncaring. Our time is limited and worth money.
Similar to you, if they have a specific question, I will answer.
Yes, that would do the trick I am sure. I don't want to sound greedy though. I think I need to come up with a set text to use each time I get such a request. Then I won't agonize over it or overthink it each time. I need to direct them to the training, search bar, classrooms where they can ask questions etc.
That is true.
I guess I don't consider it greedy, because as a CPA, I have to charge people in real life for in depth business advise, reviewing contracts etc.
Just because I am online, does not mean that my time is worth less.
You have gotten some great tips though.
I unfortunately haven't received any requests for mentoring, probably because I'm only in the 400s rank.
That said, as we do see a lot of people wishing to get shortcuts, I'd probably first point them towards the training and their referral sponsor, telling them that once they start along with training and continually build up their website, to contact the person who referred them, and if they still have problems with SPECIFIC questions their mentor isn't helping with, then they can contact you. Mention that the basic steps are lined out in training and once they've got those down, then they can get help with more complicated stuff.
This will probably weed out the people who want short cuts and you are still polite :)
That is pretty much what I have done so far but I just wondered how others handled it/think we should handle it.
I guess I just need to not feel bad saying no and tell them to follow the training, search in the search bar, ask questions in the appropriate classrooms here, see if blogs or questions or training already exists that answers their question etc.
I just feel awkward saying no but successful people need to learn to do that since there are not enough hours in the day to please everyone else. We need to stay focused on the end goal knowing that is the only way we will reach success ourselves and therefore have the ability to help many more people from that position of success. (I have seen that in the past and it makes sense). Kind of like if you give away all your pennies to charity when you are poor you will feel like you are doing something but in reality if you saved and invested and scraped up all you could and then became rich, you would actually be able to help many more people (or animals or whatever your cause) in the end. It is hard since I want to donate to every cause but I know I can't. There just isn't enough money. In this case, there isn't enough time! The question is where do you draw the line?
I need to come up with a standard reply to these requests I think. That way I don't need to agonize over each one. I should write up a good approach to finding help like those we discussed and then use it and not worry about it any more.
You're definitely right, you can't help everyone! But you also don't want to be hand feeding everything the training covers to people looking for shortcuts. Don't feel bad for saying no!
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Hi Jessica,
As someone who gets a plethora of coaching/mentoring requests.
It is important to stand your ground and say no.
As noble as your intent to help is.. you would be sacrificing your own business in doing this.
Follow with what @ericcantu said below.
Thanks Jay. I am sure you get that every single day. I appreciate your encouragement to just say no!