Self Esteem Issues....Until Now!

What is self esteem?

The dictionary says, "Confidence in one's own worth or abilities."

I have had a rough past. Very rough. The fact is I was hurt emotionally and physically (molested) from the age of five to 15. Ten years of my life was so hard. Him doing this to me did a horrible number to my self esteem.

I have never learned to overcome this pain. I had gone through many counseling sessions and several attempts to take my own life as a teenager. I would always quit something if it got hard because I knew in my mind I was not going to complete it anyways. I went through many horrible relationships because I did not know what I was doing to myself. I did not know my self esteem was the one thing holding me back.

Then I was told because of what happen to me I would never be able to have kids of my own. I was devastated and felt like it was my fault. So I gave up on ever being a mom or amounting to anything.This was just another blow to my self esteem.

I met my now husband when we were kids. The time and our ages grew us apart. This was all right. We needed to live some life and learn some lessons. But on one fateful night.......

My friend tricked me into going to the hospital. I was having issues with my body and could not figure out what they were. They took blood and I told them one problem was pain. They came back and gave me something for pain. I was sitting in one of the curtain rooms so I could hear everyone talking. I heard the doctor run to the nurses station and ask if they had already given Room 13 (the room I was in- go figure thirteen of all numbers) the medicine for pain.

The doctor came in and told me I was pregnant! I could not believe it! I did not know what to do! The first person I called was Ronnie (my now husband) and told him I was pregnant. He was speechless.

I had a perfect 9 months and delivered on time and a perfect delivery to a beautiful daughter named Autumn Novalee. After that me and Ronnie started talking about tying the knot. It was the best thing to do for not only Autumn, but for ourselves. Which we did on September 7th, 2013.

I am sure you are wondering; why I am telling you all of this? When I started for Wealthy Affiliate I had never had a place I felt I belonged. Not only did I not think that I belonged, I never felt I would amount to anything. Now I am working my way up the ladder with WA and I am coming along nicely with my new page. I am very proud of the page I am making right now and have put 100+ hours of research into my page. I feel better than I did about my last one that I tried.

I honestly can feel myself gaining the self esteem that I have never had in my life. I have that feeling now that I can do something and not fall on my a** or be looked down upon.

I hope there are others that read this and if they can relate. Please keep going with WA. It has an amazing community and people who are here to push you up and help you reach your goals! Give it a chance and don't give up! YOU CAN DO GREAT THINGS!