Losing my Focus
Hi everyone,
Please bear with me as this blog is probably going to bounce all over the place.
It all started July 23/19 and it shall be laid to rest today July 25/19
Yesterday I felt discouraged and felt the impact of someone else's negativity, which I put up with since the 23rd. For two days I was subjected to questions about why I am here, my income status, why am I called an ambassador when I certainly am not deserving of that status. Ouch!!!
I felt attacked, by the continious comments back and forth. I defended my position as politely as I could but they were taking their toll on me. This lady was questioning why she should become a premium member of WA. She searched for every negative aspect and fired away. Yes I did get wounded, but I survived. Let's call her Milli to protect against the innocent.
Milli's last comment to me, that crossed the line:
This is making me have more doubts, I don't care about being popular or having 1.3 thousands friends. that means nothing. the only reason I came here was to try and make money.
you are the third ambassadors I have spoken to here who is making no money.
It is extremely discouraging :(
This for me was an attack not only in my belief's in the the WA community, but the whole wealthy affiliate program. It was at this time that enough was enough.Time to introduce Kyle to this lady.
Dear Kyle,
Help ASAP Kyle.
All I have been is getting negative comments from this person. I have been polite. Please check the correspondence. This is two days now. I am losing patience, and have been positive and controlled my words.
If you can step in please do. Thank you.
Please step in cause I am stepping out. I do not like people with negative attitudes toward WA.
His response:
Thanks for letting me know, you aren't the first to complain. I appreciate you bringing this to my attention here.
I have noticed all the correspondence with this person has been removed. I did appeal to Kyle with attached correspondence. He was quick in his reply. I look at my e-mail histroy and see this person has been removed from my content.
Well at least I was not the only one Milli was confronting.
All of this reminded me of something I had read sometime back. It had to do with focus. This lady caused me to lose it, I let her get to me. Consume my energy and my time.
Anyway here is the story about the teacher:
One day a teacher wrote on the board the following:
9x1=7
9x2=18
9x3=27
9x4=36
9x5=45
9x6=54
9x7=63
9x8=72
9x9=81
9x10=90
When he was done, he looked at his students and they were all laughing at him, because of the first equation which was wrong. The teacher then said the following.
I wrote the first one wrong on purpose, because I wanted you to learn something important. There are many in this world that will focus on your one mistake, and not the many things you did right. I wrote right 9 times, but none of you congratulated me for it. You all laughed and criticized me because of one wrong thing I did. So this is the lesson...
We live in a world where someone elses insecurities will be pushed upon you. They may ignore what you have done right, but what you have done wrong will be highlighted.This is their way of trying to elevate themselves by criticising you for your one mistake.
The important thing is not to be discouraged, always rise above all the laughter and the criticism. Stay strong and stay focussed.
OK some parts of the story most likely are not excatly as the teacher told it, but I do believe the message is conveyed
My gosh, I make so many mistakes here at WA but I know, no one is laughing at me. They will reach out and help me to make the proper corrections, so I can continue my journey. This is a special place for me and I will not let anyone disrespect our community. I will do my best to be polite, but I do have boundaries as we all should have. These boundaries make us who and what we are.Please do not let someone elses insecurities bring you down. It happened to me yesterday, this was not a good feeling.
We all have choices, at least I would like to think so. Yes, I could have hit the delete button everytime I saw the negavity. I decided to stand and fight, I can do that to a certain point and as long as it is between myself and the other person. You insult my family and I will ask for reinforcements, when I feel restricted to the weapons I am allowed to use. Words can be the most powerful weapons there are readily availably to us. How we us them is key to the outcome.
Yes, I did feel like swearing, my gosh I am an auto mechanic. I am well versed in that type of a vocobulary. My golden scale is so helpful to me, and it was teetering yesterday. Words, my gosh what an impact they can make. Once the word is spoken you can not take it back. We have authors here, and some of the posts I read just overwhelm me. So much knowledge here, and it is all shared.
I appreciate this community, you have never let me down and I thank you for that.
I am here to stay.
Thank you all for being a part of my life I appreciate you very much. I wish you all success, health and happiness.
My best wishes to everyone,
Michael
Recent Comments
122
Sorry to hear you were bullied by this woman, because that´s what her behavior was; bullying. I know what it´s like to be bullied, both offline and online, so I´m sorry whenever someone has to experience that. :/
It would be easy to say "don't care about that", but I know it´s impossible not to care when someone tries to hurt you. Just because someone wants to be mean.
WA is a community in which I have been safe so far, but I guess in any community sometimes a person with mean intentions finds a way in. People in a visible position in a community, such as ambassadors in WA, are an easy target for these bullies to attack.
I know it´s not easy to not take it personally, but the problem is in the head of the bully, not in you Michael.
Hi Kiristi, perhaps it was part my fault. WA is a safe community and it was proven to me.
As soon as I mentioned this to Kyle, he stepped in. Never thought he could move that fast :)
There was an immediate stop, I thought I could handle it myself. There is that point where, it is better to let go than speak what really is running through your mind.
Falling to that level would have been a failure on my part.
Much appreciated Kiristi,
All the best,
Michael
You are a thoroughly good person Michael.
You are decent and truthful, you treat others with courtesy and respect. You are dedicated to your family, friends and to this community. You are in every way an excellent person.
I don't know you personally but I believe this is a good description of what you really are inside.
Cheer up and enjoy the day!:-)
Cinderella
Hi Cinderella, thank you so much for the kind words. Life is a two way street. For it is in giving that we receive.
Much appreciated,
All the best,
Michael
Hi Michael I am sorry this happened to you. It sounds like you dealt with it in a very polite manner. Working online really does teach you to protect yourself from negativity, unfortunately so much of it comes from people who are negative and insecure themselves and have so much to learn.
I wish you so much success.
Denise
Hi Denise, thank you for your comments. Much appreciated. Perhaps it was partially my fault. Either way it was another lesson I learned here at WA.
Thank you Denise,
Wishing you much success also,
Michael
Thanks for your honesty Michael. I remember a class I took where I told the teacher I wanted to work at home and she was really negative and dismissive of my hopes. I now believe she was a very unhappy person and wanted to bring others down with her. Wipe all Milli's comments off and throw them in the garbage. That's where they belong. And then walk tall and carry on and keep interacting with us, cuz we love you!
Barb
Hi Barb, you are awesome. Thank you for the comments. Much appreciated.
I will use Milli's experience as a lesson, not to waste so much time and energy.
I let her get to me, but the power of WA once again prevailed.
All the best Barb,
Michael
Hey Michael,
Ohhh, thank you for sharing your story here. I'm really glad you reached out to Kyle and he was able to help.
Years ago, I went to a personal development course and it was one of the best experiences I had. One of my coaches said, "never ever let anyone in your mind rent-free".
It really works...
Take care and I wish you well on your online business.
Monica
Hi Monica, thank you for your comments. Much appreciated.
I like that coach, very smart attitude.
Wishing you all the best,
Michael
Hey Michael, you'll find haters everywhere, as you already know. Milli, on the other hand, is a special kind of negative. Nothing you say is going to change Milli's mind unless you can show how to make a pile of cash without doing any work. The work part is what Milli doesn't get. Move on, be happy. No time to waste.
Sometimes my penny takes a while for it to drop but after reading this and your reply in my post, I think it finally did. I now know from whence the comment came/started.
That said, I have a 'modicum' of something in the grey matter department but there are some things I fail to understand. It's not that I'm daft but I don't have the ability to comprehend some things. Negativity is one. There are a few others but here's not the place.
All said and done, could I hold back when really pushed ? When something I truly believe in is challenged ? Who knows, l wonder if there is ever a 'comeback' that is going satisfy someone's desire to infect all around with their poison.
Anyway, you're here, they're not.
Hi Twack, I really do not think there is a comeback when someone is so negative. I exhausted myself trying to find one but realized it was futile.
I think it is in our nature to protect the ones we care about, therefore I would say, No it is likely you will not hold back when pushed.
You will respond more eloquently than I did.
Best wishes,
Michael
Not sure I would Michael, emotion tends to lend an unwanted hand sometimes but I like that you said so, so thank you. As Jim Rohn's mentor,Earl Shoaff, used to say.' there are only nine or ten horrible people in the world but they get around.'
The very best way to deal with the Millies of this world is to thank them for their input, wish 'em a nice day, and say adios.
Takes every bit of the fun out of it for 'em and leaves nothing for them to press the attack with.
My grandpappy used to tell me; They can't get your goat if they don't know where you keep it tied. He was so right.
My version is; They can't jerk yer chain if they don't know where it's hangin'.
Since others have had the Millie Experience, it seems that Millie might have an agenda other than building a successful business here.
Good on you for enduring Millie. The simple fact is that she doesn't know what you know or understand what you understand.
KC
Hi KC,
Love the sayings by your grandpa and you.
Every once in a while there will be a Milli, I think I will be more prepared as what to do under the circumstances.
Thank you KC for the comment,
Best wishes,
Michael
Michael,
So sorry to hear in great detail what you have been through at the whim of a negatively minded person.
The attacks and bad intended insults are not only inappropriate here but you surely don't deserve them. For that matter no one here at WA does deserve such, much less someone like you.
Everyone os free to form opinions, grounded in reality or facts or not, and the gate in and out of WA is always open.
In general, we hear about trolls, but the intensity of that which you went through seems to go even beyond that designation.
Please rest assured that you are well loved here by too many to count and that a fluke like that will not alter it at all.
We have an old proverb which says:
"In a riverbed, the water may or may not be running, but the stones endure."
Blessings
Hi Gabriel,
No one should be subjected to any type of negativity. We are all trying our very best.
I once was was a solid stone, but the river has eroded a part of me. I am not as strong as I used to be, I am what I am.
I do not know if you like country and western music. I like some of it, I can understand the words.
I always relate back to songs, one that comes to mind was by Charlie Pride. OK perhaps two:
I was born to be exactly what you see nothing more or less, I am not the worst or the best. I am just me.
https://youtu.be/DyECD1t1HnA
Hope it works, and you don't mind a bit of country
The other one defines happiness to me. Charlie Pride is wealthy, and he attempts to compare his wealth to his fathers. He wants his father to leave his farm, the hard work and and all that is involved in running a farm. But, his fathers wealth is defined in a different way. I am sorry I can not remember the titles. Part of that erosion from the river :)
Imagine this tall oak tree, being subjected to the high winds that blow away everything in its path The only thing to survive the wind was this oak tree. Why? Well I am glad you asked Gabriel, "Because it was strong enough to bend".
Best wishes my friend,
Michael
See more comments
Looks like greed and wanting money fast is blurring her focus a bit. I hope she’s alright and in some moment in her near future she stops, reflects and thinks about her reaction and how she could have behaved and genuinely conversed with you differently and more positively. We can only hope at the end of the day that people in their emotional turmoils and challenges see some sort of spark/ seed along the way that aides them in becoming a better version of themselves! For not only them self, but optimally for others along their journey as well!
Glad you see the difference and glad you are out of the space of the anguish and have peace of mind in accordance to “letting go”. :)
All the best to you!
Patricia
Hi Patricia, thank you for commenting.
Very powerful words, sometimes it is not us, but people in their own emotional turmoils. So true.
Much appreciated,
All the best,
Michael