Be careful how you say it!
Be careful how you say it!
Have you ever offended someone but did not mean to?
I know I have and it’s stinks.
For example “ You have a face that could stop a clock”
To me, I thot ,gosh you are so pretty! Seriously I did.
Well, let me tell you,how wrong,wrong ,wrong I was.LOL
The person hearing it thot I was calling her anything BUT pretty, in fact in her words “ you just called me ugly”
She said you could had said “ you are so pretty you could stop time “
Wow what a difference in words.
I remember years ago one of my hospice patients had just passed and the funeral home arrived per protocol. The kind soft-spoken gentleman informed the family “ we will take the body now and yall can call the funeral home to set up a time to make arrangements.”
It was a smooth transport , or so we thought.
A few hours later,the young 10-year old grandson became very upset per his Mom.
The young grandson whose name is Joe began crying to his Mom “ where are they taking Nana’s head, where are they taking Nana’s head?
Joes Mom asked”what are you talking about, what do you mean?”
Joe explained thru his tears” that man , he said he was taking Nana’s body”
Indeed that is what the guy said!
Here is another example.
My sweet, sweet,cousin that would never knowingly offend anyone did the following.
Her best friend of 30 plus years had informed my cousin that her Mom was very ill and did not have long here on earth and her MD told her to start making funeral arrangements.
So she and my sweet cousin began the process of planning for the funeral.
Four days later the Mom passed at 2 am.
The friend didn’t want to talk to anyone but she did want my cousin to know she passed.
So she sent my cousin a text stating” she has passed”
She requested my cousin to just text her when she got the message but do not call.
My sweet cousin honored her friends request .
She didn’t call,she simply texted back “ LOL”
Yes she did.
She thought LOL meant lots of love!
Oh my gosh, you can’t help but laugh.
My cousins friend immediately called and was belly laughing, stating , “ oh I needed that , I know you thought lol had to mean something besides
“Laugh out loud”
You can imagine my cousins horror!
Oh we have laughed over that so many times .
All of this got me thinking about WA.
Wonder how many times I have said one thing, meaning one thing, yet sent a completely different message.
Hmmmm, makes me ponder !
Be careful how you say it!
Will you please share one of your blunders ?
Assuming you have one lol,
Elaine
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No specific instance comes to mind, but I have screwed up and said the wrong thing on many occasion. We silly humans!
Hi Elaine
Your first example made me laugh, since it is typically the thing we would say, seeing that English is not our first language. So I usually warn people that if something sounds a bit off, PLEASE ASK, since sometimes things simply doesn't come out the way it is intended.
Wishing you an awesome day, Elaine!
Sharlee (Chocolate IceCream)
Sharlee,
Thank you so much for stopping by, glad to know I’m not the only one to blunder lol
I experienced one of these as well. A young black girl asked my about a locomotive that had been sitting idle for some time. I check ed on it for her and said, "Yeah. That one's been sitting for a coon's age."
She looked shocked and asked, "What did you just say?!"
I said, "A coon's age, you know, a long time?" I had no idea what she was upset about.
"That's not what that means!' She turned around and huffed off.
I was dumbfounded. Then it hit me. She thought I was making a racial slur! Egads!!
I quickly got on Google and printed out the explanation that the phrase alluded to something being old, as in how old fuzzy little critters called coons live to be quite old...a.k.a. a locomotive sitting a long time.
I immediately took that printout to her to show her I wasn't being racist at all. I'm sure I would have been fired that day if weren't for good ol' Google. lol
It is amazing how one thing means something to someone and something entirely different to another. In our heart-on-the-sleeve world today it's easy to get in quite a bit of trouble.
Oh my goodness and lol
I’m from the south and I get your point , and hers lol
Glad you were able to clear things up for her and you didn’t get fired,
Thank you for stopping by!
We are humans thus not perfect but its a good practice to be careful what we say. This applies to me in using sign language, ASL. We have to be careful to sign correctly to prevent misunderstandings, happens a lot with us in the Deaf community. My blunders was saying the wrong word in sign language that caused a misunderstanding. Each state in US and in Canada Provinces have their local sign language. I have to learn what the Deaf locals use as I am from Minnesota and DC/MD/VA, all sign different from the Deaf community where I live in the Pacific northwest.
Oh, thank you for your reply.
I never realized these differences but it makes sense.
Thank you for bringing this to our attention.
Great post. I am always saying things the wrong way and apologizing later.
My worst blunder is not something I can repeat on here. It had to do with an ER situation and CPR.
Laura
Oh, yes, I have had my share of the old foot-in-mouth.
I once told a friend, "I don't care what anybody says about you -- I like you." Of course, I was just being "cute" -- no one had said anything about her.
She got totally insulted. Took me a while to convince her I'd meant nothing negative.
Oh, the blunders I have made!!!
The most embarrassing? Asking some poor lady when her due date was... she wasn't pregnant!
Shaunna
PS... How are you two doing?
I can relate to this. When I was about 30 a guy I knew said this to me. I wasn't insulted but just looked at him and said I'm not pregnant... just getting fat... It was the truth.
Poor guy, my sense of humour gets me in trouble.
If I remember to do one day at a time... Great! (Some days I bite off more than I can chew) LOL.
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Hi Elaine,
The meaning that different people and cultures give to words has always fascinated me and was one of my favorite topics in grad school when I studied communication. Love your post.
Because I am a lot more aware of how people can perceive or misconceive what I say, I am more careful of how I give compliments. For example, I used to say things like " you look nice today." At first glance there seems to be nothing wrong with that "positive sounding" statement.
However, some people may be offended by it. "Does that mean I looked horrible yesterday?" they may be thinking. Of course that's not what I meant. So that there be not doubt of what I mean, I now say, "You look nice."
Hello,
Thank you very much for stopping by and sharing some good points.” You look nice “ is a lot safer indeed.