How are we all doing?

bySaraPoyner

1.7K followers

Updated 5 years ago

I just wanted to write a very quick blog before 'Home School' starts to ask: How are you all doing?

Here in the UK we have been on 'lock down' for one week. I am not going to lie it has been the longest, hardest week of our lives and in fact I feel like I have lived many lifetimes in that long seven days.

I have been through the anxiety that nobody seemed to be taking the virus seriously and were not adhering to any social distancing at all, so although 'Lock down' was something I never would have agreed to before (I love my freedom and liberty too much), now I am quite grateful for it, it has made me feel safe, and as a mother I feel I can keep my children safe this way.

At the beginning of the week my company closed its doors for a while and I did not know if I had a job anymore or whether I would have any income. Four sleepless nights followed, and days trying to home school and not let the stress and anxiety show to my children. I am pleased to report our government has sorted the income issue and I find myself grateful to a government I do not agree with and did not vote for.

Like many, in the early days, I became a little addicted to the news, watching hours, just in the hope some news would come and then just to keep up with how the world was doing. However, after days of just hearing the word Coronavirus and hearing of all the new cases and deaths, I decided to abandon that and just 'check in' every couple of days, in case there was anything I needed to do.

So I am sure like many of you, we now live our lives in the confines of our home boundaries, living, eating, sleeping, cleaning, teaching, working, socialising, relaxing, stressing, arguing, and loving in four walls and if you are lucky a garden. I am all of a sudden truly grateful for my home and the warmth and safety it provides us. I am grateful for every bit of food and of course every roll of toilet paper!

Sayings like 'beating the curve' and reaching 'the peak' are all common place now. I never thought that in my generation I would be in lock down during a pandemic. I am truly grateful I am where I am and in the position I am, money, jobs, things mean little now, and it is the laughs, the conversations and the love that means everything.

Here in the UK we are allowed an hour of 'exercise time', apparently this is 'good for our mental health'. So we all endevour on our daily walks around the block. Mostly this is a lonely silent experience, where you can hear the creaking of the fences and the clanging of the lamp posts. Occasionally you will encounter another human being, doing the same, or walking their dog, and you do this awkward make way for each other, trying your best to stay over 2 meters apart. You smile and sometimes have the courage to speak. Then sometimes (if you are lucky) you get the bonus of meeting the same person (or people) on the other side of the block, and you both laugh.

My Mum is 72 and suffers from COPD, so she has been put on a strict twelve-week isolation. Now my sister and I live in fear, protecting her like the most precious thing in the world. We have to love from afar. My sister delivers supplies, knocks and has to walk away, she says it is heartbreaking. I live away from her and have had to cancel going to stay at Easter. I speak to my Mum every day now, whereas before 'the virus', we would speak when I had time! When we speak, we talk about nothing and everything and she has now learned to send GIFFS, so we laugh throughout the day at stupid things, truly grateful for each other.

I have become much more connected and caring of the world and my fellow human beings. I listen to their figures and stories and feel the same anxiety, fear and pain, but also we share the wonder of the human spirit and the connection. Community spirit has been reignited and here in the UK we met on our driveways in our dressing gowns to clap for the wonderful NHS staff who are on our front line.

I am also grateful for all the networks and connections I have through social media and here at WA. It's amazing how in a crisis strangers can become friends and a whole world can connect and realise there is no difference between us, no matter of our colour, creed, religious orientation, sexual orientation. Borders and countries and rules and laws mean nothing to the virus. We are all human and have lungs and imune systems that may have to fight it.

If we are lucky, nobody we know (including ourselves) will get sick, and we will breathe a sigh of relief that we obeyed the rules and avoided it. But then we will hear from a friend whose mother has died, or someone famous who has contacted it, or a doctor who died treating the sick, and we will be reminded that we didn't escape it, because we too feel their grief and pain and loss, we are living this together.

What I have learned in the last seven days is gratitude, for even the smallest thing. As I watched the news last night, I saw those in India, in crowds trying to flee home to their villages, and inside I feared for them and sent them love.

Ten days ago, all many people thought about was shopping and panic buying as much as they could, stockpiling toilet rolls, paracetamol, pasta and tinned goods. This week in isolation, all you think about is how none of that matters, just being well, warm, fed and loved is enough.

I admit, I am going stir crazy inside with the Hubby and my two children. They sing too loud, there energy invades mine, they are demanding and needy. I am exhausted yet bored at the same time. But wow am I grateful for them and it all.

I am happy to report my website is doing well and I have 6 more sales in the last 3 days. I have lots of time for my new website, in fact I have nothing but time and energy to dedicate to it. So I end this blog with healing and well wishes to you all and of course much gratitude for having this outlet and the opportunity to connect. Be well my friends.

Much Love

Sara

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