You Will NEVER Make Money Online! You’re USELESS! You CAN'T Do This!

byParthaB

4.2K followers

Updated 1 year ago

You’re walking down the street with your best friend.

It’s a beautiful, warm, sunny day.

You’re shooting the breeze with your bestie, you’re both laughing, you’re loving each other’s company, life feels brilliant.

There’s hundreds of people out in the street, who also happen to be enjoying this wonderful day.

Suddenly, for no apparent reason your best friend slips over and falls straight on her butt in the middle of the street, which is witnessed not only by you, but the hundreds of passers-by too.

Your immediate reaction is to berate your best friend, “You IDIOT!! Get Up! You are so embarrassing! Why do you always do this to me? Seriously, you are a terrible human being and you don’t deserve to live on this earth. Can’t you see everything looking at you thinking what a clumsy imbecile you are? Just get up, hang your head in shame. Let’s go home, you obviously can’t be trusted to be out in public. You are such a terrible person!”

Would you EVER in your wildest dreams speak to your best friend like this if they had been unfortunate enough to slip over in the middle of the street?

Okay, perhaps some playful banter along these lines, but would you ever think of shattering your friend’s mental state with this choice of words?

Of course you WOULDN’T.

Let’s look at this scenario again, but this time we’ll remove the friend from the equation.

So, now it’s just you walking down the street on your own.

Everything else as described above is exactly the same.

Guess what, when YOU slip over, the above text is EXACTLY what you say to yourself.

You tell yourself you’re an embarrassment, that you can't be trusted in public, and perhaps even that you’d be better off dead.

This is the EXACT reaction of the “little voice in your head.”

The Jay Shetty Experiment

“You Are Too Dark”.

“You Are Not Good Enough”.

“You Are Worthless”

“You Are Not That Pretty”

“You are the Ugly Twin”

Jay Shetty, is a Londoner, he was actually born and lived about 8 miles down the road from me.

Jay enjoyed a normal upbringing in the North-East suburbs of London, school, college, university, loving parents and lots of friends.

While at business school Jay attended a talk on selflessness given by the monk Guaranga Das.

This talk had such an impact on Jay that not only did he make a beeline to talk to Monk Das, he eventually completely gave up business school, and his life as he currently knew it.

Jay then went to India for 4 years and lived as a Monk.

This involved giving up ALL of his worldly possessions, while spending every day of the next 4 years, working, reading, praying, exercising, and meditating.

You could say that Jay had a spiritual awakening, and upon his return to the Western World he decided that his calling was to be of service to others.

Jay now lives in Los Angeles, has one of the most popular podcasts in the world, “On Purpose With Jay Shetty”, with over 20,000,000 listeners PER MONTH.

And of course, Jay is now a multi-millionaire.

So, what are the words above in quotation marks all about?

A few years back Jay invited 8 young women onto his podcast.

He asked them to write down all the terrible things that these ladies said to themselves.

Basically, what was their inner voice constantly telling them.

Once written down, he asked the girls individually to read them out loud.

This clearly led to a lot of negative emotions coming to the surface.

There were tears, sadness, and even a tinge of anger at themselves.

Jay then disappeared from the room to return with another, much younger girl.

He then asked the “original” woman to turn around and repeat exactly what they had said to themselves to the young girl behind them.

In each and every case the younger girl was the original woman’s younger SISTER.

What was their reaction when told to repeat all the terrible things they had said to themselves to their younger sister:

“NO, I CAN’T DO THAT!”

And yet, these ladies were willing to constantly berate, be angry, and be incredibly inhumane to themselves, BUT there was NO WAY they would speak to their little sister in the same way.

If you want to watch this Jay Shetty experiment unfold for yourself, here’s the YouTube link - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mHoAV3FMQxI

BE PREPARED TO SHED A TEAR OR TWO!

Things We Say To Ourselves

“I can never remember names”

“Nothing ever goes right for me”

“I can never find anything”

“That’s just my luck”

“Everything I eat goes right to my ___________” (fill in the blank)

“Today just isn’t my day”

“I’m so clumsy”

“I never have enough money left over until the end of the month”

“I just hate to talk in front of a group”

“I just can’t do it”

“I never seem to have enough energy”

“Why even try?”

“I could never do that”

“It’s just no use”

“I’m just not creative”

“I can’t seem to get organised”

“I can never afford the things I want”

“I’m too shy to do that”

“I never know what to say”

“Sometimes I just hate myself”

“With my luck, I don't have a chance”

“I never get a break”

“I’m no good at maths”

“I’m nothing without my first cup of coffee in the morning”

“I never seem to get anyplace on time”

“I’m just not cut out for that”

“I’m really at the end of my rope”

“If only I were smarter”

“If only I had more time”

“If only I had more money”

….and the list goes on-and-on-and-on-and-on-and-on

credit@Shad Helmstetter - THE GIFT

You are ABUSING Yourself - CONSTANTLY!

Going back to Jay’s experiment, none of the women were willing to talk to their little sisters in the same way they speak to themselves.

What about you?

Would you speak to your spouse, friends, family, or children like this?

I know you’re going to say NO, definitely NOT, but unfortunately, we DO speak like this to ourselves, every single second of the day.

And do you know what, we DO actually speak to and INFLUENCE our CHILDREN by doing the same to them.

You could actually consider this child abuse (well, in the modern world where we're offended by everything) - we are making our children WEAK by forcing our limiting beliefs onto them.

Personally, I feel I had two of the greatest parents that ever lived.

They were kind, generous, loving, and wonderful people.

Guess what, they unknowingly did the above to me.

My mum constantly worried about “what other people would think” or wouldn’t want me to do a lot of “normal” children things because “I was weaker and smaller than the other boys and I’d get hurt”.

My dad NEVER complimented me EVER. I didn’t actually find out until his dying day that this is how his parents were to him.

Basically, the aim was to never compliment so that he (and I) would push harder and never be satisfied with “just good enough”.

I DID NOT get what my dad was trying to do.

He was pushing me to become a better person.

I thought that I was useless.

In fact, the last words that my dad ever uttered to me were, “I’m so sorry, I am so, so, so, proud of you. I’m sorry!”

His hand fell away from my face… he died.

I had waited 42 years to hear those words from my dad, to feel as though I had earned his approval, and they happened to be the last words that ever came from his mouth!

This SHATTERED me inside… or rather the negative voice in my head Shattered me inside!

Are you starting to see how the words you say to yourself, and perhaps even to those you love, can shape yours and their entire life?

Guess what?

Some of you may be aware, others will be in total ignorance.

You have approximately 50,000 thoughts per day.

95% of those thoughts are repeated, ones that you have day-after-day.

These thoughts are ALL typically in the past or the future, hardly ever in the present moment, e.g. “what if”, “if only I had”, etc.

70-80% of those thoughts are NEGATIVE.

This means that 35,000 - 40,000 of the thoughts you have EVERY SINGLE DAY are NEGATIVE.

Would you say 35,000-40,000 negative things every single day to your friends, your spouse, your partner, your kids?

So, why the hell are you saying them to yourself?

Read that sentence in the image above and UNDERSTAND IT.

This is NOT You

Okay, you know that annoying voice in your head?

IT IS NOT YOU!

Nope!!

Bet you didn’t know that!!!

Those thoughts control every single decision you make on a daily basis and yet these thoughts ARE NOT YOU!

They are your thoughts.

YOU and your THOUGHTS are two completely different entities.

You decide to go on a diet in order to lose weight.

10 seconds later, “Oh look cake, I’ll eat the cake today, and start the diet tomorrow.”

THAT’S NOT YOU, it’s your thoughts, YOU ARE NOT YOUR THOUGHTS.

BUT, you've allowed those thoughts to INFLUENCE YOU!

Today’s the day you’re going to finally, properly start working on your website.

“You can’t do this.you can’t even find a decent keyword, it takes you days to write an article, and you still have hundreds to write before any semblance of success. What’s the point?”

WOULD YOU SPEAK TO ANOTHER MEMBER OF THE WEALTHY AFFILIATE COMMUNITY LIKE THAT?

And yet, your inner voice (IT’S NOT YOU) tells you this all the time.

STOP ALLOWING something that ISN’T YOU to CONTROL YOU!

It’s a Long Journey, But Now You Know!

Just because you’re now aware that the harmful, rude, and terrible voice in your head is NOT YOU, you’d think it would be easy to stop!

It’s NOT!

You have conditioned yourself to think this way for 20,30,40,50,60,70.80 years.

It’s the same as having ANY BAD HABIT for a long period of time, it’s going to be really, really, really hard to STOP.

And guess what, while you’re trying to be a more positive person, that annoying little voice is still going to be there:

“Shut Up, you can’t do this. You’re stuck with me for life, and I’m going to break you bit-by-bit."

DON’T ALLOW THIS TO HAPPEN!

If you want to change your life then change the way you talk to yourself.

SERIOUSLY!

I mean it.

The 3 easiest ways:

When you catch yourself being negative use STOP words/phrases and say them out loud:

“Don’t Go There”

“Let it Be”

“Let it Go”

“It’s in the Past”

“Leave it Alone”

“Focus”

“Don’t Pay Attention”

“This, Too, Will Pass”

“It Doesn’t Matter”

“Breathe”

“You’ve Got This”

Movement

We typically stew in our negative thoughts because of lack of motion.

Yep, you heard right.

In fact, if ever you’re not FEELING motivated to do a task, remember motivation is a FEELING.

And ALL feelings that we feel are spurred by ACTION.

How many times have you said (or in reality, NOT YOU, but that horrible little voice in your head), “I’m not FEELING motivated now, I’ll do it later”.

Motivation is a FEELING.

ALL feelings are spurred by ACTION.

You don’t WAIT to feel angry - an action makes you angry, e.g. someone jumps the line in a queue.

You don’t WAIT to be sad, an action makes you sad, e.g. you drop your ice cream on the floor.

The same goes for motivation.

In fact, the word even TELLS YOU it requires action

MOTIVATION = Motion in Action.

Not feeling motivated, negative thoughts clouding your mind, the task in front of you seems too big, ACTION is required.

Any Action.

For me, I get down and do 25 push ups every time I feel my brain fogging over and as though I’m about to procrastinate.

Works for me.

Stand up, stretch, go in the garden, or outside, and take 5 deep breaths (4 seconds inhale through your nose, hold for 6 seconds, 7 seconds exhale through your mouth - you’ll be AMAZED at how calming this is, do it 10 times a day, especially when that little voice in your head is being an idiot).

Come back, set a timer for 7 minutes, that’s it, 7 minutes, that’s easy enough right?

Start working, you’ve got to do 7 minutes, everyone can do 7 minutes work without getting stressed, right?

Finally, be aware of your environment, and the things you do to yourself.

Do you know what the main reasons are for ultra negative thoughts?

Someone internally isn’t quite right because of YOU, no-one else, but YOU!

You’re hungry, you’re dehydrated, you’ve had a poor night’s sleep, you haven’t exercised in years, you don’t get at least 20 minutes fresh air in a GREEN ENVIRONMENT per day (yes, plants, trees, flowers,and fresh air can “heal the mind”), you eaten a massive carb-ladened meal, you’re drinking too heavily, you’re taking drugs.

As wonderful as some of these things are, they WILL have an impact on your mental state.

Am I an angel who lives like a monk?

HELL NO!!

But, I am very aware of my thoughts and feelings, and what I need to do to change and improve them.

STOP ALLOWING SOMETHING THAT ISN’T YOU TO BE SO HARD ON YOURSELF.

You are NOT your thoughts.

Tell those negative thoughts to SHUT UP!

Write down 5 things you LOVE about yourself.

Do it NOW... don't be embarrassed about complimenting yourself. Your embarrassment is NOT YOU, it's that nasty little voice in your head!

And go get to work.

I believe in YOU.

Now, it’s your time to BELIEVE IN YOURSELF.

Thank You For Reading

Partha