Yes or No - That is the question and answer
Recently, I had to tell someone "No" and it felt good. Actually, much better than good; it felt...
***** s u p e r a w e s o m e*****
Does that make me a horrible person, yes or no? You see, if I had said yes to this, I would have been busy for this entire (long) weekend, unnecessarily. I prefer to relax and spend time with the family and catch up on WA activities :). Saying a thoughtful "no" can be invogorating and liberating.
As it turned out, there are others who are more qualified and available than I could be at present. Had I said yes, who do you think would have suffered most these next four days?
For many years, I was the person who mostly said 'yes' when asked for favors or plainly, for help with anything. This attitude allowed me to;
- solve a few challenges
- develop meaningful relationships
- learn a lot about some things in the process
Yes, I know... That seems positive doesn't it? So, what is this all about, you may be saying.
There are many advantages to helping out, but the other side of the coin is that this attitude also caused me a bit of panic and frustration at times. Some of those favors were huge and required a lot of time and effort and much to the disadvantage of my family, work, and personal rest time. They are others who are also willing and able. I am not Spider-Man ( My favorite superhero, not Super-Man as you may have expected me to put there).
To cut a potentially much longer story very short, I will simply say this. We must always be willing to help others and put them first when necessary (this is important at times). However, also weigh the "costs" of undertaking projects/challenges against what you can afford to sensibly "give away."
Now, depending on the situation, will you carefully consider what your next answer will be? Will it be Yes or no? That is the question...or is it the answer? Answer responsibly because your answer may have lasting effects on others close to you. Believe me, you will endure the consequences of your answer one way or another.
Have a productive day and remember, saying "no" is OK sometimes.
All the best and more.
David
P.S This is nothing to do with helping out where possible at Wealthy Affiliate...:)
Recent Comments
71
No doesn't seem to be in my vocabulary. Constant problem for me in answering questions.
https://plus.google.com/u/0/102190144035729060009
Saying no is very difficult for me, especially to people very close to me ... and the ask me for favors often. Those that are not so close, rarely ask. Presumably, I wear this stern face that makes me quite unapproachable!
Thanks for a lovely post.
Mojalefa
Thanks for sharing, Mojalefa. Perhaps that stern face has protected you from yourself :).
Much success!
David
It's taken me a long time to learn to say 'no' too. And the more 'hats' you wear, the more difficult it is to prioritize.
Funnily enough, it was when I retired that I learned to say 'no'. It's too easy for people to think that now you are retired you have nothing to do. The same goes for those working from home.
That is such a great post. Especially those working from home need to weigh up their reply 'Yes' or 'No' carefully. As you say, each has a 'price' attached.
~ Isabella
I love it, Isabella. Thanks for sharing such wisdom.
What took you so long, lol? They have had all of your "yesses" already...:)
All the best
David
Both my wife and myself are creators not fixers, we both get asked to repair jewellery, wood work and even ceramics. I have always said No regardless, but my wife finds it very difficult.
Yes, as we get older, we supposedly get wiser.Thanks for sharing. I am open to receiving much wisdom, Jerry!
All the best.
David
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Hey, it is necessary to consider the situation before saying yes or no. No does not mean we are a bad person!
Very true, John. Thanks for sharing that important info.
Have a great weekend!
David