Somber Day for Me Day of reflection.

byapache1

12.6K followers

Updated 2 days ago

Today is the 28th of December and a day that is always on the back of my mind.

You see on this day back in 2008 I was at the swimming pool with my family enjoying a day out from the heat and having fun swimming and cooling down.

Well a few hours later I felt some pain in my shoulders and chest and thought perhaps I did too much swimming and overdid it.

Swimming was one of my loves competing for the school and in the state championships representing my school among other sports.

Well I guess I did overdo it as I felt I needed to rest a bit. Went up to the grandstand to sit down and felt more pain, I saw my wife coming out of the pools as she felt something was not right and to check up on me.

I saw her coming and clenched my fist and placed it on my heart to tell her I felt I was having a heart attack.

She called the lifesavers at the pool they gave me some oxygen and a mask while another staff member called the ambulance.

We were swimming at the indoor pools as it was too hot outside

Fortunately for me,the Ambulance came within minutes as apparently they were down the road having a lunch break.

Once the ambulance staff arrived they did their usual checks and questions. Also two paramedics arrived as well within a few minutes later I think it was a few minutes.

I told them I felt I am having a heart attack plus the pain was getting stronger in the chest.

So they gave me some aspirin to put under my tongue to let it dissolve slowly. Ever tried taking a tablet without a drink and only to have it dissolved under the tongue? Not a nice taste

They said they would be taking me to the hospital and let my wife know

So we got the kids to get their gear packed along mine. They helped me stand up but I scared the medical staff as I turned around only to see if we have all our gear ready. I was just checking this was done but they thought I was going to fall or something and grabbed me quickly. I told them I was just checking we got everything.

Funny I looked up for the first- time and noticed that the whole indoor pool area was cleared out and evacuated to the outside pool.

There were only a couple of staff, the paramedics, ambulance crew along with my wife and kids. All the shutters were closed so no one could see what was happening.

They then took me to the ambulance and all I was concerned was to make sure we had all our gear ready as my wife would need to drive the car to the hospital with the kids. That was my only concern at the time.

Sure enough, once I got to the hospital it was confirmed I had a heart attack and a bad one as I found out a few months with various tests that around 42% of my heart was permanently damaged.

While lying on the bench in emergency, my wife and kids were there they were only around 11 and 9 of age and I am guessing perhaps 30-40 minutes later, I saw one of the staff take them away. I thought why do that when they were there all the time?

During all this time I was conscious and was communicating all the time , the next thing I knew I woke up in the ambulance again but this time with the professor who was checking on me.

I thought I was having some memory issue as I didn’t see her in the ambulance before when I got in at the pools. But was told I blacked out and was unconscious for a while and also flat-lined so they had to first stabilize me and when they did I got put in the other ambulance and headed to the other hospital.

When I woke up in the ambulance, she said I looked a bit better and my face wasn't so pale. I said what do you mean I looked better and how pale was my face?

She then said she didn't think I was going to make it to the hospital in time but for some reason, I woke up just before I got to the hospital.

Then she explained that when I went unconscious and flat-lined once I got stablized they had to take me to the other hospital as they had all the needed equipment there.

That is when I realized why they took my wife and kids away and hence the trip to another hospital because of what happened to me that seemed like a split second as far as I was concerned to think communicating with hospital staff, seeing my family being taken away the next thing I was waking up in an ambulance and didn't even feel I nodded off. The lights just went out and I didn't know.

I guess nodding off was an understatement.

Apparently my wife saw what was happening on the screen monitor as she worked in the hospital and knew how to read the screens but keep it quiet for the sake of the kids.

So it must have been terrifying for here while staying strong for the kids, let alone having to focus on driving the car later to the other hospital then the second hospital.

The professor performed the surgery on me and I found out she was the best in the state so at least I had the best in town and even better, my Medicare covered it all.

Guess one of the great benefits of being in Australia didn't cost me a cent even the follow ups as all was under our great Medicare system we have here.

During the emergency, I had one stent put in which one artery was 100% blocked, another artery was 75 % blocked but that wasn't considered urgent so a few months later had my second stent put in for that one then.

I have had 3 more stents put in since, the last 3 stents in one session a couple of years ago, so 5 in total.

So today is not the best of memories for me. Later when I was in hospital recovering I started to think of the past with my parents and myself.

Mum died at 50 years of age. Then six months after Mum died Dad while driving a van had a sudden heart attack at 50 as well and he was just under a month older than Mum.

I had my heart attack at 50 years old as well.

A couple of years later Dad had another heart attack but this time needed open heart surgery that was the normal thing then.

Going forward to 2005 he was singing with a choir on the 25th December Christmas Day when towards the end of the show collapsed and apparently they thought he had a heart attack was taken to the hospital.

I wasn't there but the vice president of the club rang me as Dad was the president of the club and let me know then I rang my brother who was an hour away and came to the hospital.

He had to get transferred to another hospital via helicopter due to the emergency and was unconscious. We did get to see him awake the next day but found out he had a stroke on that day and his right side was paralyzed.

He got to see the kids and I remember him stroking my daughter's hair but he couldn't talk. All I could do with the hand that worked was to get him to squeeze mine for yes and blick his eye for no. That was the best we could do but he was aware of his surroundings and what happened.

To me, that was one of the toughest times of my life to stay strong in front of dad, and not worried him while staying strong for my kids.

Where on the 28th of December 2005 he passed away of a major stroke that caused bleeding to his brain. I got to the hospital around 10 minutes too late once the staff told me to come but at least I got to see and communicate with him the day before.

This was the same with mum, I was the last person to speak to her before she went into a coma and at the time of passing the family were there as the doctor gave us three days and he was totally correct with the date then all of a sudden she opened her eyes kind of like saying this is it.

But couldn't speak or communicate. My hands were over her hands over her chest and I felt the warmth disappear in an instant she took her last breath.

Oddly enough when I spoke to the Vice-president at Dads funeral he mentioned that a couple of days before this happened they needed to get things ready not only for Christmas Day and Boxing Day but also for New Years Eve's at the club and Dad told to to make sure everything needed to be organised in case he wasn't available.

The Vice-president thought that was an odd thing to say as he knew Dad had things organised in advance with many things plus knew he was going to be there anyway.

Seems that Dad knew something already in advance.

So for me, it may sound coincidental but think of the dates and ages.

Mum passed away at 50, dad had his first heart attack at 50, Dad passed away on the 28th of December 2005.

For me I had my heart attack at 50 in 2008 which was three years after dad passed away also on the 28th of December so you can see this is not a favourite day for me. Nor is the number 50 a favorite number.

I tried to put it all behind as much as I can but this is not something that is as easily said than done, compared with other general things in life.

But I try to be strong and focus on other things where I can but if I don’t check in as usual you know why.

I tend to go through this each and every year at this time, it does lighten up a bit each year as far as pain and sorrow are concerned but the memories will not nor should it go away.

Life is an experience regardless of what we face or about to face. All part of learning and what we do as a result.

I still have more to learn from this but getting there I have been starting to get more visions and messages back to the way they used to be when I was more let's say spiritually involved in life. So things are changing and something is on the horizon for me just not ready at this stage for it. But soon.

So I may just keep to myself and perhaps rest or do some work on the side on my website instead, not sure I will see on the day.

Mainly to keep my mind occupied from the past and focus more on my inner thoughts and more with what else I am doing.

Thanks Andre