All is not lost

Last Update: Aug 16, 2014

33
923 followers

As I was sitting around, pondering the problems of mankind,

Between searching for keywords that I just couldn't find.

I realized that at my age I didn't give a rat's anymore. Because...

.. If walking is good for your health, the postman would be immortal.

.. A whale swims all day, only eats fish, drinks water, but is still fat.

.. A rabbit runs and hops and only lives 15 years, while

.. A tortoise doesn't run and does mostly nothing, yet it lives for 150 years.

And you tell me to exercise?? I don't think so.

Just grant me the senility to forget the people I never liked,

the good fortune to remember the ones I do, and the

eyesight to tell the difference.

Now that I'm older here's what I've discovered:

1. I started out with nothing, and I still have most of it.

2. My wild oats are mostly enjoyed with prunes and all-bran.

3. I finally got my head together, and now my body is falling apart.

4. Funny, I don't remember being absent-minded.

5. Funny, I don't remember being absent-minded.

6. If all is not lost, then where the heck is it ?

7. It was a whole lot easier to get older, than to get wiser.

8. Some days, you're the top dog; some days you're the hydrant.

9. I wish the buck really did stop here; I sure could use a few of them.

10. Kids in the back seat cause accidents.

11. Accidents in the back seat cause kids.

12. It's hard to make a comeback when you haven't been anywhere.

13. The world only beats a path to your door when you're in the bathroom.

14. If God wanted me to touch my toes, he'd have put them on my knees.

15. When I'm finally holding all the right cards, everyone wants to play chess.

16. It's not hard to meet expenses . . . they're everywhere.

17. The only difference between a rut and a grave is the depth.

18. These days, I spend a lot of time thinking about the hereafter . . .I go somewhere to get something, and then wonder what I'm "here after".

19. Funny, I don't remember being absent-minded.

20. HAVE I TOLD YOU ALL THIS BEFORE..........??

Now that IS a bit of a worry. I better return to my WA lessons in a Hurry!

Recent Comments

78

We're not getting older we're getting better. Age is just the number of years this world has been graced with our presence!!! LOL!!!

NO. 11 is funny, did you think about all of these? Brilliant post. Seeya later. Don't forget, you still have to look for more keywords.

Not all mine Jen, just some of them, I borrowed others. #11 I made up from #10

Thanks for the giggle!

My pleasure Carla.

That is so funny... and so true! Real food for thought, thank you.

Thank you Wendy, glad you liked it. I have sent you a follow. Take care.

Did you just test us, Simon? #4 & 5 are identical.
This is hilarious but serious.

Yeah it is serious especially when you forget where you are going in your own house!

Not kidding, Simon! That has happened to me today already. I got up like I was on a mission, went to the kitchen only to ask myself what I went there for. Strange stuff, heh?

Yeah, sometimes I go to the loo and then don't want to 'go' if you know what I mean then I ask myself what am I doing here? Serious!

Next time that happens, just wash your hands to give you the satisfaction that you did something in there.

Enjoy your weekend.

Good idea, thanks!

I'm still laughing. Your All is not lost is Great !

Looks like we have a lot in common Mr. cubandane. I'm sure our paths will cross one day at the airport when our ship comes in...

Johnny, I will be looking forward to that day because it will mean that we would both have made it in Spades. Did you intend that ships would be at the airport? Spaceships maybe! Good one. LoL

No it go's like this, With my luck " when my ship comes in I'll be waiting at the airport ". Instead of the port...

Johnny, I will look out for you and make sure that does not happen. Stay well brother.

That´s really good and I like this one:A tortoise doesn't run and does mostly nothing, yet it lives for 150 years....I think is telling us not to rush and not to worry...just stay cool :-)
Thanks for posting it and have a great weekend!

Ores, you are so right. Seems a lot of people joining WA want to hit the ground running! For what. Its a long haul scenario here. Better to be a Tortoise!

Love it!

Thanks Peter, Glad we have a similiar sense of humour. All the best.

#8 was my favorite! Excellent! Melody

Thanks melody, glad you liked it.

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