For the Love of Toilet Paper!

Last Update: Oct 8, 2015

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986 followers

So today I am going to tell you all about what my jerk of a cat Bingsu has been up to lately. Here she is in her mugshot:



So two mornings ago I open my bedroom door and I see strips of toilet paper everywhere. And there's a roll of it behind the front door and there's two more half-unraveled in the kitchen. And of course there is Bingsu the cat watching me the whole time prouder than a peacock. So I start hollering at her and pick everything up and bring it all to the washroom. And that's when I see this:



I always keep the toilet paper in the washroom and the cat has NEVER touched it before. But something possessed her to shred and toss those rolls all over the house in the middle of the night. As you all know by now I have clog dancers that live above me and I didn't hear a thing while she was busy making trouble.

So I get the brilliant idea to put the toilet paper in the hallway closet. The hallway closet that's like 10 feet from the washroom :(

Today was a busy day. Baby had a doctor's appointment that took way longer than it was supposed because the doc was late, a quick trip to the grocery store afterwards turned into a forever trip to the grocery store, and dinner didn't get onto the table until late.

For whatever reason my delicate constitution was upset tonight and I needed to go to the washroom. But the baby needed his dinner so I got him through that. Then the baby was being a Screamy Crabby Appleton so I decided to put him to bed before I used the washroom all the while trying to find a happy place.

So anywho, baby is finally in bed and I make a mad dash for the washroom and relieve myself. Everything was going swimmingly until I reached behind me for the toilet paper and there wasn't any there...

Oh yeah...in my rush to show my cat that I have the superior intellect I moved the toilet paper to the hallway closet. Way to go Sherlock, now what are ya gonna do?

Not a problem I think. I will ask my teenage daughter to bring me some. I open the washroom door a crack and:

I whisper her name and...nothing

I call her name and...nothing

I yell her name and...nothing

What the heck? Did she go to bed while I was putting the baby to sleep? She does that sometimes. I don't know if I can wake her up but I decide that maybe she's oblivious to the sounds of her own name but she will respond to something out of the ordinary.

So I start calling out:

"Hey are you asleep?"...and nothing

"Yodelayheehoo!"....and nothing

"Winner winner chicken dinner!"...and nothing

"Somebody poisoned the water hole!"...and then I hear:

"Mom are you alright in there?"...success!!

Ha ha I will be saved!

So I ask her for a roll of toilet paper from the closet and she half-asleep brings it and leaves it outside the washroom door on the floor. I'm trying not to fall off the toilet with one hand (gross I know) and fish the roll of toilet paper out of the hallway with 2 fingers of the other hand. And there's Bingsu the cat fighting me for the roll of toilet paper that she thinks is her new play-toy.

So I call out to my daughter again and she comes back to the washroom. I tell her she's going to have to hand me the roll because the cat won't let me pick it up. So I open the door something more than a crack while my daughter is shooing the cat away.

My daughter picks up the toilet paper roll and it's just connecting to my hand so I'm not holding the door anymore and Bingsu the cat jumps up and knocks that sucker flying into the door and back down the hallway it rolls. But when she knocked the roll I was trying to grab it so the door got knocked open in the process.

Yup picture it...me nakey on the toilet holding on with one hand and trying like mad to grab the door with the other but no such luck folks. The door flew all the way open and my daughter is just standing there with her mouth open.

The cat is eating the toilet paper roll at the end of the hall.

And there's me trying to cover my nakey and I yell out:

"Turn your head! Don't look! I'm naked and I'm falling!"

And so of course my daughter then has to look and she's dying laughing.

I must look ridiculous trying but failing to reach the door handle to close it while sitting on the johnny pot. In the end my daughter wrestled the toilet paper away from the cat and threw it in the bathroom and slammed the door.

And here is what I got to take care of my business with:



Nice...real nice kitty...just you wait. I will have my revenge. I don't know how and I don't know when...but I promise you it will be EPIC when it happens :)

Today I can totally see why some people are not "cat people"

Try not to laugh too hard at me when I see you in the streets Lovelies :)

Thischick aka Lori


Recent Comments

51

LMAO!! I reading your blogs! But if it's any consolation I used to have cats but my hubby had me get rid of them. Now I have 2 Rottweiler's named Smith and Wesson and they too get into the toilet paper and get it all over the house in true Rottie style. Hmmm...maybe we humans are missing the thrill of a lefetime? Nah!

I may just have to play with a roll of toilet paper in the middle of the night just to see what I am missing...or maybe not :)

Lol, great read. My cat has taken to stripping my wallpaper, she is worse than my kids...

Hey Olive,

Kids, cats, and wallpaper...sounds like a recipe for disaster ha ha :)

She is the worst cat I have ever had Lori....

ha ha can just imagine that be one of those you've been framed moments , cats are in a league of their own when it comes to mischief

Cats definitely know how to put you in situations that are not only embarrassing but also hard to explain :(

they sure do I once had a very vocal one

Awesome read Lori , if I was Bingsu I would be thinking " Bingsu good time to go on vacation me thinks "" lol
Alexander

Yes indeed it's time...I agree :)

Now, I'm curious what that EPIC will be! Can't wait to read it and have another good laugh. Thischick really makes my day! You sure are one great of a story-teller! Thanks for sharing what your day looked like today!

Thanks for reading Betcha...although some would say "way too much information Thischick!" and indeed they might be right :)

Good laugh Lori! Unfortunately cats, unlike dogs, do have a mind of their own, so unless you send her off to the pound I'll think you'll have to live with it.

She keeps the mice away so she gets to stay. Before she became a member of our family the mice enjoyed watching my son play with his toys from 2 feet away while I had a nervous breakdown :)

Better get used to shredded toilet paper then!

Just way to funny. Thank you for finishing my day with good laugh. I have had those days. But my cat is innocent. It's me that causes my bad days. Jim

Glad I could make you chuckle Jim :)

Great story and so picturesque. That darn cat. Thats why I'm a dog person. I enjoyed the whole read. great bedtime story,Lori.

Truth is stranger than fiction.

Marty=)

Maybe that will be my revenge...I will invite a dog to come live with us. Serve her right :)

Thanks for sharing this delightful story. It was very entertaining and funny!

And now we can never look each other in the eye if we ever run into each other on the street :)

Oh, I'm sorry, but that was so funny. You're writing is great and kept me laughing. I have a kitty too. She has not been that bad, but has had her moments. Your kitty is very pretty and looks like a little bandit. Thanks for sharing, it was hilarious. :)

If you notice the picture of her, she was in the freezer. Jumped up there while I was putting the groceries in it. She's a pretty little menace :)

Oh, I didn't notice that till you mention it. She sure likes to be in the middle of everything. :)

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