Drama no more

byScarlet8

234 followers

8 years ago

It’s so very interesting, this phenomenon that when you’ve finally committed yourself to something that you’ve been intending to do for a very long time, life suddenly starts to get either really busy or just plain weird. People you haven’t seen for a while want to meet up with you; your washing machine breaks down, so you have to go shopping for another one; you suddenly come down with the flu, etc.

After a year of being interested in it, but not feeling ready, I had finally committed myself to signing up for the starter membership with WA. Great!....and guess what happened the moment after I actually did sign up....my life, out of the blue, got really busy. Emails needed to be written, events organized and unexpected administration sorted out not only a.s.a.p., but literally NOW, right at that moment. I started to get a bit anxious, because I wanted to start working through my beginners course in order to take full advantage of the free membership. Got through all the other stuff that needed my attention first. Nearly at the end of my free 7 days when I finally could commit and promised myself to really start the next day with focusing on the first lesson of the beginners course, a storm took down the power lines that night and on top of no power I also had no internet reception.

I felt very annoyed, because this is certainly not the first time something like this has happened: after a long period of procrastination, when I finally decide to take action on something important, but at the same time also daunting, life just doesn't seem to cooperate with me.

Let’s sit down for a moment and work through this once and for all!

• Could it be a sign that I’m doing the wrong thing?

But how can signing up with WA be the wrong thing when it really feels like the right thing for me to do. This is not done on a whim. It’s done after lots of research over a long period of time meditating on it, sleeping on it, pondering it, sitting with it. From whatever angle I considered it, it felt right.

• Could it be a test, to see how committed I really am?

That's possible. Life tests us all the time. It’s a great way to find out where you really stand in the matter. At such a moment do you feel like pushing through, or do you feel like abandoning ship. ‘Quit while you’re still ahead’ your mind tells you. In this case, that was not what my mind told me. I only felt annoyed and more determined to get into WA.

• Could it be an insight into what's happening in my unconscious?

On a conscious level I really do want to do this online business thing and go after financial freedom, but on an unconscious level I might still holding on to beliefs that “I’m not good enough" ; "How could I make this work, knowing only the very basics about the internet" ; "Who do I think I am, thinking the world is interested in what I have to say”……Damn, I thought I’d worked through all that nonsense. Maybe another therapy session is an order,...... or maybe I just need to stop buying into that old, boring story and instead go with this burning desire that’s at my core; the desire to explore where my highest potential lies and how that can be of service to anyone out there in the world who is ready, willing and hopefully eager enough to listen.

I chose the latter option……I signed up for premium membership with WA!

O, and just in case you were wondering, YES, my world has gone back to normal again. The weather is beautiful, power is back on, my internet connection has never been better, and family and friends just give me the peace that I need. And as for the Drama Queen in me, well, she’s gone back to sleep as well. Now she knows I’m serious and I mean business this time, there is no use anymore for her in my life :0)