December 23

December 23 in any year is a special day for me; on this day in 1990, my first born, Jeffrey, passed away at the age of 6, and on this day in 1997, my youngest son, Jason, was born (and his due date was actually the same as Jeffrey's birthday!). So even though I have the challenge of dealing with Jeffrey's passing, I also have the blessing of Jason's birth. It can make for an interesting mix of emotions.

And today was no different than this day has been over the past 24 years. I did my best to focus on Jason's birthday; Jason lives here in Syracuse, too, and so I volunteered to make a cake for him--a chocolate cake recipe he'd found and which is incredibly decadent! I started the cake this morning and then checked with him to see when he'd like to come get it; at first he talked about coming early this afternoon, but some unexpected developments occurred and he decided to come tonight after his evening shift at work. For that reason, I delayed making the frosting until after my fiance and I had dinner so it would be as fresh as possible when Jason came to get it. The picture above is the finished product after we'd cut into it; I'm not really good at making a beautiful product, but I can sure make it so it tastes good!

Despite the fact that I did pretty well at focusing on Jason, some sadness crept into my day and caused me to get upset over some little things, bringing me to tears at some situations that really wouldn't normally have bothered me. When those times occurred, I simply withdrew to some solitude for a few minutes to allow myself to be with those feelings and then recover.

So all in all, I can pat myself on the back because I've not only made it through this day, but I also overcame the difficulties and was able to have time to be here in WA, which has definitely become a daily priority for me. I really am pleased with myself for being this determined to reach my goals! This tells me that there probably isn't anything that will stop me from not only achieving what I've set as my targets, but going further, too.