Show Appreciation for the Wealthy Affiliate Community (What Got You Here May Not Keep You Here)
The purpose of this blog post is to thank Kyle Loudoun and Carson Lim, and everyone who is involved with the day to day operation of Wealthy Affiliate for such an outstanding platform
One of the wonderful aspects of Wealthy Affiliate is Site Support, the Help Center, Live Chat, and the opportunity to send a PM basically to any member of Wealthy Affiliate if you need to do so.
I know personally that these four benefits were the selling point that caused me to join - and to this day it was one of the best business decisions I've ever made.
However, in every "community" there are issues from time to time.
Sometimes We Rub Each Other the Wrong Way
Some of you reading this blog post may have had a less than stellar experience trying to interact with another member here at WA.
I know when I first came aboard, I was fresh off of my membership with the Warrior Forum, and I was one of those guys that would pm you as many times as I deemed necessary if I needed help.
That was a bad habit I picked up from the Warrior Forum.
As a matter of fact, if you were a successful War Room member, or I perceived you to be successful and you could help me with an issue, I was going to pm you.
I would literally wait for days for someone to pm me back. Sometimes, I never received a response.
Usually if I sent a detailed message of a paragraph or two trying my best to outline issues I needed help with, along with appreciation for their time and a Thank You, I would get back only 3 or 4 sentences to "just go do this..."
The Warrior Forum was brutal.
My Sincere Apologies
Although we're a large community, we can't physically see each other, so when someone at WA get's a PM, it's not possible to know just how busy they are or if someone's in the middle of a project.
I want to take the time to apologize to anyone I've ever PM'd here at Wealthy Affiliate if I've interrupted you, irritated you, or showed a lack of appreciation for your time.
I'm Sorry.
I really mean it.
Along with my Make Money Online posts, I write posts on personal development, and I can usually get a sense of a person's demeanor or disposition by the way they reply back.
I remember one incident here at WA about a year ago where I had sent a PM to someone in the top 50, and the reply I got back was such that I wouldn't PM that individual again.
Most of the reply's I've received have been kind, considerate, and showed a genuine willingness to help. There are many hands here at WA that have made my load lighter, and I sincerely appreciate it.
Do You Feel That People Don't Appreciate Your Time?
To those here at WA who find guys like me irritating and an encroachment of your time, think about this:
There is a Chinese saying that goes: “If you want happiness for an hour, take a nap. If you want happiness for a day, go fishing. If you want happiness for a year, inherit a fortune. If you want happiness for a lifetime, help somebody.”
For centuries, the greatest thinkers have suggested the same thing: Happiness is found in helping others.
"The sole meaning of life is to serve humanity" — Leo Tolstoy
"We make a living by what we get; we make a life by what we give" — Winston Churchill
"Giving back is as good for you as it is for those you are helping, because giving gives you purpose. When you have a purpose-driven life, you’re a happier person" — Goldie Hawn
"You can get everything in life you want if you will just help enough other people get what they want. - Zig Ziglar
"There is more happiness in giving than there is in receiving" - Jesus Christ
Science Confirms the Benefits of Helping People
Scientific research provides compelling data to support the anecdotal evidence that giving is a powerful pathway to personal growth and lasting happiness.
Through MRI technology, we now know that giving activates the same parts of the brain that are stimulated by food and sex. Experiments show evidence that these reactions to genuinely helping people is hardwired in the brain—and it’s pleasurable.
Helping others may just be the secret to living a life that is not only happier but also healthier, wealthier, more productive, and meaningful.
Helping Doesn't Always Feel Great
On the other side, it's a fact that giving doesn’t always feel great. The opposite could very well be true: Giving can make us feel depleted and taken advantage of.
This could be true of those here at WA who are very successful. Some may feel that people who are always "encroaching on their time" are unappreciative and don't understand.
Granted, that may be true to some extent. It's also true that life is 100% how you view it. It's our FEELINGS that motivate us. It's HOW WE FEEL that determines what action we take
How Do You View People - Really?
The answer, then, is changing the way we view people - changing how we view a potentially irritating situation.
I had to learn to change the way I feel...
I own a window cleaning business here in Baltimore, Maryland. 98% of my customers are residential customers. Many times they can be downright rude and unappreciative.
However, I cannot act the way they act! I must be a professional.
When I'm in another person's house, their "space", I have to be on my best behavior. I can't tell you how many times customers have absolutely irritated me; sometimes the homeowners would irritate me so bad I would go outside to the work van and just sit and calm down.
I had to learn to change the way I feel toward the customers, especially those who are abrasive and rude. It wasn't until I learned the power of two words that my relationship with customers started to improve in ways I couldn't imagine:
I'm Sorry.
Even when I knew I was right, if the customer felt I've given them less than adequate service, I put my feelings aside and learn to say "I'm Sorry..."
Two of the most powerful words on earth...
I Had to Change the Way I Think
It wasn't until I changed the way I view people that my relationship with the customers drastically improved.
I learned the hard way a very important lesson: You cannot make any measurable progress in any endeavor in life until you change the way you view people.
True story:
I have one window cleaning customer who gave me a surprise the first time I visited him.
I rang the doorbell and a man came to the door. I introduced myself with my business card.
As soon as I walked in the door along with my assistant he said: If you break any of my (bleeping) windows, I'm gonna kick your (bleep)"!
I'm a 6' 2" tall black dude. This is a feisty Italian guy in a wheelchair!
There was a pause. I looked at him and I bust out laughing with a smile on my face.
I said "Mr Frank - how are you gonna kick my (bleep)? Can we video this and put it on YouTube? We'll both make a fortune"
He started laughing. "I'll find a way, (bleep it)!" he said.
After that exchange we talked during the entire appointment.
He's been one of my best customers for years.
I got to know the guy, why he's in a wheelchair. His wife is a wonderful person. He's still abrasive to this day, but because I made a decision to view my customers differently, we have a great relationship. We call him "Potty Mouth Frank."
We clean Mr Frank's windows twice a year, and every time we come he reminds us "Don't mess up - I'm gonna kick your (bleep)!"
Mr Frank will do anything he can to help you if you ask.
The point is this: Regardless if you have a brick and mortar business or an online one, it's Enter your own correction... to learn how to treat your customers and your online contemporaries and develop a genuine willingness to help people.
I can tell you for a fact that many of you here at WA would see a measurable increase in revenue if you made your #1 priority finding a way to genuinely HELP PEOPLE.
I can also tell you for a fact that some of you here at WA need to "step your game up" and incorporate more professionalism in your online demeanor, especially when you feel irritated at the demands coming at you from all sides.
Your Attitude Will catch Up With You
Unfortunately, there are some who will dismiss this post and say I don't know what I'm talking about.
Yes...there are people who are arrogant and are firmly set in their way of thinking, especially if their are convinced their way of thinking has propelled them to some measure of success.
I have news for you...
It was your skill set that allowed you to enjoy success. Your arrogance just came along for a ride.
Funny thing about arrogance - it always hits a brick wall. Hard.
Learn to love helping people.
Do it 'cause you want to.
You will never regret it.
Talk Soon,
Howard
Recent Comments
24
Howard,
Some of the aspects you have mentioned are true yet for my part, I try to help or find someone to help if asked. Never too busy to assist. I feel it comes back many times over when helping and giving. This is a philosophy taught by my parents when I was young. Working for him in the family business and watching him is why I am who I am today.
Wish you much success here at WA.
Take care,
Bill
What a wonderful blog! I'm going to bookmark it.
When I was much younger I kept a small journal book of quotations and I think I should start again.
Thank you for sharing your wisdom and the funny story.
Howard, you do, indeed, know what you are talking about -- and I love your quotes. Very apt. This business is founded on the premise that to help yourself you must first help others. It's basically the way our ranking system works. The more you help people, the higher your rank will go.
Don't change your philosophy, as it is a good one.
Very thoughtful post and we take your point.
We all need to help each other but we also need to take accountability for ourselves and seek answers in the vast amount of training here.
Thanks and hope you have a fantastic week ahead.
C & P
Wise words Howard and well put. I learned a long time ago that not everyone can be pleased but, everyone can be reached.
You have less than 10 seconds to make an impression on someone. Make it the best you can and get them to smile with you. Just like your Mr. Frank, if one just accepts the other person for what they are, friendships will blossom or wall will be put up.
What can I do to make your day better today?
Hi :)
These are just some scattered thoughts I had while reading your post. Probably too long? (my thoughts I mean)
I have been around on and off for a few years but am still in the beginning stages of my current website. As of today, I have not completely finished the Certified Course with all five courses. LOL.
I try to help maybe one or two people a day when I log on and then I get busy working on my own site and pretty much put the blinders on. I have not received many PM's (yet) for help. I usually just scan the questions, and answer a few that I feel I have an answer to.
If I did receive tons of PMs, I probably would start to feel annoyed I suppose. I'm just being honest. I am no saint. Like I said, I try to help a few people and then figure there are enough other people around to help some others.
I feel like everyone needs to do their own due diligence, aka work their way through the training. I don't mind helping people with things they don't understand but I am not interested in holding people's hands through the entire process. Does that sound awful?
I also feel that there are affiliates here that have more stake in helping those they recruited as it helps with retention of members that they recruit.
I'm not an affiliate for Wealthy Affiliate. I have a different niche. I only benefit from helping in the way you mention. Its just a good thing to do and my life is just better when I do...but with in reason, and not at the detriment of getting my own work done.
I know I receive help every time I ask a question. It isn't always the same person. I get a lot of various views and I like that. So, I have been helped and appreciate it, AND I do help also...to a degree.
So, I get all that you said. And am happy cause it sounds like you learned some life stuff. That's cool :)
Totaly love your post. So true on so many levels. I also believe that you can turn someone's arrogance, or bad attitude around and make it a better situation, hence having a long-lasting relationship!
When I first came on board back in 2017, I came in under someone who stated from the beginning, I am here for you, and if you need anything, please reach out, and I will be there.
Well being someone with less average knowledge of the internet worl, I did reach out. few times for different issues. Guess what? That person never got back to me. While I was still learning to navigate around the system, I got fustrated and moved on.
One of the things I am taking from this post is, people come to this site for many reasons, but importantly, some have never dived into this pond before, and true reach out for help. If no one is there to support and help them, then we are at fault for saying "I am there for you".
I could go on with the various things I took from this, but, I am glad you wrote this informative post, and hope everyone reads it, because when we are recruiting WA members, we need to back up what we say, and offer.
Have an amazing Sunday, and many blessings.
See more comments
So very true Howard.
I have been a student of Eckhart Tolle for quite a few years and I practice mindfulness daily. I have come a long way since I started but a week or so ago I was standing in the supermarket and I had this intense feeling of being connected with everyone in the shop.
It literally just came over me and I felt absolute empathy and a feeling of being one with all those people. I have never felt such peace, it was a wonderful feeling.
It lasted a few minutes and then it was gone. But, and what I'm getting too is, if we are all connected then helping our fellow man helps ourselves.
Do it not for the thought of what you will get in return, help with an open heart and no thought for rewards.
Try it today, keep your eyes open for someone who can do with a helping hand, give of yourself and see how you feel. I can guarantee it is addictive :)