3 lessons how to start online marketing stress-free

Last Update: July 08, 2013
When I joined WA I experienced the same excitement that many other here. I started with excitement but then I got stuck here that there and often did not know what to do next. Some steps I made wrong and it was discouraging. So tension and stress started to build. So here I want to share 3 lessons how to start online marketing stress-free. Maybe it helps.

Have you ever played Mancala (the game at the photo below)?

Many years ago, influenced by my friends I bought one and I really enjoyed it. It is great tactical game. But then we moved to Indonesia and the game found it’s place in one of our cardboard boxes. It stayed there for years until we returned, opened the box and found the game again.

I was busy with other things so I did not bother to spend time with it. Yet my other family members got excited and started to play. They had fun quite a few days until my older daughter came to me and told that she wanted to play with me. I agreed and we started... Only then I discovered that I did not remember how to play. My daughter quickly reviewed me the rules and off I went… Only to discover again and this time the way bigger problem I was sitting in – I did not remember the tactics! I knew the rules, these were not difficult. But the tactics and strategies… I had no idea how to play it.

So needless to say, I lost the game and my daughter enjoyed the moment.

“Ok, let’s play again,” I suggested. She agreed and we started again. I lost again… And again. But after 2nd and then 3rd time I started to understand the game. Not the rules but the life and dynamics in that game. “Bigger picture” began to form and it got harder to my daughter to win.

I think you have experienced this kind of feeling: Somebody introduces you a new game (maybe in tablet or computer or wherever). Maybe your kids or your friends. They say: “Please try,” and you say: “OK, let me try. What should I do?” And then they explain you the rules and you start. Only to lose (and usually fast) because you still don’t have any idea what this game is about. But trying few more times the understanding starts to build. What is interesting is that to the understanding an excitement follows – the more you understand the dynamics the more you feel that you can do it and you want to win.

Same pattern in IM
And I see exactly the same kind of pattern also here in WA and online marketing (especially if you are new in IM). If I don’t have any previous experience with IM and I jump in then I quickly get overwhelmed: What should I do? What is the next step?... And then there all these kind people around in WA who tell me what are the rules and how I should “play”.

I follow the rules but but I still don’t have any idea what this “game” is about. I don’t have the bigger picture. I don’t understand the dynamics of it. And here I get stuck. Because I am afraid to make another step? So the stress starts to build up. I have pressure to perform and succeed but don't know what to do.

Why am I so afraid? Because I am afraid to fail: “What if I make it wrong?”

It's easier if I see the whole process as all these kids’ games – before I am able to win I have to understand what this game is about. One WA member wrote somewhere here that he failed twice with his niches and it took him 6 months until he could make enough income to go full time. We rather like to jump over these failed attempts and do the winning shoot right away.

So I have understood that we should not be so afraid to fail (especially on our first attempts). We should welcome these things as opportunities and learn from even those failed attempts, make corrections and try again.

Some lessons that I learned here:

Lesson 1.
When engaging first time in some new game I usually allow myself few failed attempts to warm up and understand the dynamics of the game. But here in WA I am so afraid to fail. I take my first attempt so seriously as it is life and death question. No failure is accepted and it creates a stress. Why? I don’t understand the “game” but I try to win it on my first try.

Better to allow oneself some failed attempts too. It takes the stress off from our shoulders, we are more relaxed and we can enjoy the learning process. And if… IF we happen to fail then we don’t quit crying but take it just as a good stepping stone. We had foreseen it and were prepared. Most important – mentally prepared.

Lesson 2.
Because I want to win right away then I tend to be afraid to make my steps and often get stuck, not knowing what are the right steps. Have you ever won a chess game on your very first try? Probably no. This is why Kyle says somewhere: “Don’t spend weeks choosing your niche.” Now I understand why. Because we tend to get so dead serious with our first niche (our new business) that we are afraid to put our foot wrong. But this first attempt(s) is/are most probably just to try out, to get the feeling, to get some experience, to understand the dynamics of IM.

Lesson 3.
If we give us one and only one try (we have tuned ourselves that way) and we happen to fail then this is what it is – Catastrophe. We failed and have to quit, frustrated. We never return because: “We once tried it and it didn't work.” After that we start to program ourselves in a negative way: “We are not able to succeed online.” Even worse, we start discouraging others with our bad failed attempt: “Don’t do that. It is dangerous. You will surely fail!”

So based on the teachings here in WA, my own experiences and observations here and there then it seems that it is better to start the journey the same way as we do with some new kids game: we are determined to master the game and win it but before that we allow ourselves some time to learn the dynamics and also we allow ourselves some failures.
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cubandane Premium
Egon, Hear, Hear, exactly what Stepping Stones said. I love the analogy and I agree, you have a great writing talent especially as it seems as if English is not your mother tongue. Thanks for your input.
egonsarv Premium
Thank you very much. In fact I really struggle with my English hahahaaa. It often frustrates me because my thoughts move faster than my English grammar allows me to write... It frustrates me because I see how easy it is for native speakers to write the posts and how hard it is for me. It's hard but I just don't give up. I think that with each next blog post my English is getting little better.
Egon, What an excellent way with words you have! Thank you for the analogy. Wanting to be good from the beginning is definitely a weakness of mine. Thanks for giving a new perspective. Sherry M
bleaf Premium
Very nice article. Motivational.
wtbee2013 Premium