The Blame Game
We hear it all the time! Everyone wants to blame everyone else for their mistakes. Slipping on the sidewalk as a result of your clumsiness? Of course not; people should sweep the leaves up off the ground before they become a hazard.
Or then you have the opposite ~ people who blame themselves for everything, even when they’ve had nothing to do with an unfortunate outcome. Some people actually do believe that they cause every bad thing all or most of the time.
Here are a few reasons why people tend to use The Blame Game:
- Blame is an excellent way to defend oneself. Blame helps you preserve your sense of self esteem by avoiding your own flaws or failures.
- Blame is something that we use when we’re in attack mode. Blame is a way to try to hurt others in a malicious way. People can be ruthless and will do anything to get back at someone that they dislike or have a jealousy toward.
- We don't know how to figure out the causes of other people's behavior, let alone our own. The attributions we make can be distorted by our tendency to make bad judgments. And we're just as bad at making judgments when it comes to intent vs. outcome.
- It’s easier to blame someone else than to accept responsibility. This is a good one!! It is really difficult in accepting the fact that you're actually at fault, and then changing so you don't do it again. No one wants to be wrong, so why not blame someone else.
- People Really Do Lie. It's hard to believe, right? But it is true and it is pretty easy just to lie and blame someone else even though you know you’re the one to blame. You may figure that no one will know it was really you who spilled that coffee all over the break room, so you just blame someone else who’s not there (and hope that person never finds out). Ouch!!
Unlike other games where you can win, the more often you play the blame game, the more you will lose. Learning to own up to your role in situation will help you grow from your experiences, and help you achieve more fulfilling relationships.
Honesty is truly always the best policy!!
Bye-Bye for now, friends ~
Recent Comments
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You're so right Diane, I've seen so many people attack others and play the blame game to deflect attention away from their own shortcomings :)
It's sad to see, but it is everywhere.....not just in business but in our schools, and in life. But.....what comes around goes around, ya know?
blame blame bo bame, banana fana fo fame, fee fi mo mame, blame game! Please don't blame me, I can't help myself! I'm a loose cannon! :)
I used to LOVE to sing that song......and now I am singing it again!!! Rick, thanks for bringing back the child in me :-)
My Dad plays this game ALL the time! He should read this article :D We get very tired of it. He also plays the -Just being Negative game! He should read Pollyanna!
Loved that movie, Pollyanna!! I especially loved the prism scene with the 'rainbow maker' :-)
The best and possibly the only way to deal with people who play this blame game is to 'lovingly disengage'. You can not reason with these people. You can not point out to them that they need to face themselves and accept their own responsibilities. You can not argue with them. They simply won't accept responsibility nor apologize. So, you just have to stay out of their 'firing range' and 'lovingly disengage'.
Its pretty fun how everybody can blame somebody else but not them selfs.
What happened to me, myself and I
I did it, no me did it,
Thanks for the post.
It's a point the finger at each other kind of game.......people will continue to play the game. We just have to stay clear of that game ;-)
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I see this all the time. Why can't people take responsibility for their actions?
I know, right? In years past, I don't remember it being quite like it is today.......no one wants to take responsibility for anything anymore!
so true.