Goals & Stuff

byAtlantiSmyth

72 followers

Updated 3 years ago

Fun Fact: this post is over 4,100 words long! That's my longest post yet! (Even now!)

First of all, I want to thank Simone/@Newme202 for posting her P.U.S.H post. I'm totally borrowing from it. Secondly, if you couldn't tell from the title, this post is about my goals. I will be considering updating it as my goals change &/or I succeed in them. Feel free to comment if you'd rather me do or not! Actually, maybe not comment. I like updating this thing so I'll probably continue doing that when I can. I'll continue updating the word count total too.

P.U.S.H.

"P- planning way ahead"

Ok, well. I plan to work on raising my grades back to at least C averages so that I can focus more here. I give myself until New Year to do so. Then, after I'm back to C averages I will work towards my best blogging daily.

"U- understanding my previous ways of weaknesses, triggers and setbacks."

Ok, so last month my weaknesses triggers & setbacks included lacking motivation, and very much a lack of commitment for setbacks slash weaknesses, and my triggers are... well, what triggers me to do something positive is feeling energetic enough & wanting to. What triggers me not to do useful work is any overwhelming negative feelings.

"S- search for any form of assistance e.g. other form of success, own past blogs, any previous words of encouragement or upliftment."

Well, here is the beginning of my search. I research when I don't understand something or ask if I don't feel like nitpicking through articles.

"H- hold on to any previous help that works or new thing that you can hold in view."

Hmmm. I actually save the majority of my research in some way or form when I need to so this shouldn't be terribly difficult.

Small update: I've started Favorite-ing & tagging the resources I keep going back to. That's helpful, & I honestly wouldn't have done that much before.

+Y- as of 12/25/2020: happy holidays by the way!!!

(asks myself the below)

Why? Why do you set these goals? Why is it so important to accomplish these goals? Why are you so unmotivated if these goals are actually important & achievable? Why don't you find a solution to the lacking motivation & commitment? Why? Why do you give up when you know why you started or set the goals in the first place? Why don't you challenge yourself to apply your whole self into your goals?

Why?!

I set these goals because I want to choose to be happy & achieve my definition of success. It's important to achieve these goals because... well, because if I want to lead a happy healthy successful lifestyle then I must be taking actions to lead a happy healthy successful lifestyle. I'm unmotivated because... because I don't want to fail, I don't want to struggle when it feels so useless, and because I have to take better care of myself. I'm unmotivated because I & some of my family don't believe in me. I don't find a solution to the lacking motivation and commitment because I'm tired. I'm tired of the constant struggle, I'm tired of being tired, I'm tired of bad self image (I think I'm a really lazy selfish pig that can't deal with people well) which I've worked on but I'm still tired. And that's a me problem. My problem is habits. And... mentality, far as I can tell. My habits & mentality are the key to my motivation. I wake up & I'm cold, don't really want to get out bed, and feel overwhelmed when I remember what I need to do. And this why I give up also: I get tired of fighting. Watching the news, everything on there seems to be a struggle, which tires my soul out. The reason why I haven't applied myself to my goals the best I know I'm capable of is because I am tired. I look at what I want for myself & how far I am from what I want & I feel like I'm about to try & hike a mountain without water or food. I haven't changed my mindset to look how close I am to the top of this mountain, my mindset is wow look how far I have to go or wow that's so far away.

"Wealthy Affiliate Community

The WA community has now been added to my method of coping. You are an integral part of my coping mechanism. I use the OEC training and added bonus of reading other members' blog and giving comments and support whenever necessary, and the gem Jaaxy to get inspiration words and ideas so that I can plan way ahead for my articles on my website"

Hmmm. I'm finding that reading has inspired me once again. I can also find inspiration in my bestest friends or in the WA community as well. I'm not yet very active in this community, but I want to be despite my larger priorities (such as school & getting a job slash life and my responsibilities in my household).

I've now started saving lists in Jaxy as that is far more efficient than hand writing all my keyword notes. Much better lol.

"Self reflection is the only way that I track my life and progress throughout. Key factors of what worked well, what was a disaster and what I do need to do to have a break through are done daily through either my visual mind maps or notes. I have always done this since I've started at Wealthy Affiliates."

Ok, I think I can do something like she does in the self reflection link, which is kinda what I'm doing now anyway.

So far what's been a disaster is I'm awake before I can work on my weakest class this semester when im most energetic & strong. Then before I know it the computer lab is open but I'm occupied by then & forget that the computer lab is open! That's a disaster in my mind, and that ties into Goals 1 & 2. For Goal 3, I've noticed that I like saving my keyword research on Jaxy but physically writing out the article, especially since I use my phone to research as needed. That way I can look at what I'm taking notes from & what I'm writing down. So that's worked nicely. What I could do is, adjust my morning routine so that I exercise first thing, shower, then work on WA/Blogging Stuff for about 45 minutes, make my bread-less breakfast (I just don't take well to bread products so I eat between 1-3 servings of a bread product total per day & the rest is usually plant based & meat but more plants which includes cereal bread/toast, bagels, & tortillas, not that anyone asked) and then go to class after working on my WA slash best blogging stuff.

Goals

WE 12-09-2020

1. Use Habits to Support My Goals

It only takes 7-27 consistent attempts to build a habit. I just need to replace my habits so that their helpful to me & my goals rather than harmful. Doing so will likely require the remainder of this month. If you're curious about what habits I need to work on I dare you ask via a comment. :)

As I'm writing this I realize, wow, I could be this far from my definition of success if my habits were a step toward my goals rather than a slip in the trails. Now, that's gonna help motivate me to PUSH myself to where I wanna be! I need to do my schoolwork efficiently as possible, so I will alter my habits to support this. There's so many I need to change! The list seems endless & yet, I made only 1 D last year before Covid-19, working two days a week (that was huge for me!) and saved quite a bit & had some spending money too. And I babysat my siblings, and my bus ride was two hours long & loud in the evenings! I was doing SO well, but then I replaced the good habits that supported that with habits that hurt that, & me in the meantime! This would be one of my major setbacks, and one of my biggest challenges. Keeping helpful habits. As I write this down, I'm mad. Mad at myself for keeping bad habits. And I'm upset, because looking back I could have about a grand saved up by now and grades that could earn me a scholarship to college if I wanted one! And I already screwed up second semester last year, I honestly only passed because the teachers in my two hardest classes cut me enough slack to give me a D in those two classes. I know I didn't earn it though. I gotta fix that the rest of my high school career! I know how this works now, kinda. I gotta pull it together! Anyways, I'm gonna pass out in ten minutes because I'm tired & it's bedtime. So I'll shut up now lol, & update the word count later on.

So, I woke up this morning, & I realized that another one of my challenges is actually waking up slash managing my sleep cycle. I sometimes wake up in the middle of the night for a quick run to the bathroom but then I can't go back to sleep. And I'm still tired. I'm sure coffee will help to change that though. I've actually thought about drinking some coffee in the evenings, like before dinnertime, so that I'd crash before bedtime. Another thing is I just need to exercise much more though. I sometimes walked about six miles in a weekend when I was doing better my first semester of high school. So maybe I need to get back into that, but I do know that I should probably make sure I walk at least a mile total every day or so. Cause, that's what I was used to. I walked from class to class, & I chased my friends around in the cafeteria before/during breakfast. So I just gotta make exercise a thing for me again. And I gotta talk to my friends for fun more often. I got this though, I can have it all. I just can't do it all at once.

2. Raise Grades
I want to do better than just passing. I liked the satisfaction I felt from almost all Bs before Covid-19 Quarantine hit. I want that feeling back, and I want it back soon. I have until New Years Day to complete this goal.

3. Work Towards my Best Blogging Daily

I don't want to half off things. I want to write the best I can, learn as much as I can, do as well as I can, and have it all effortlessly. I want to build the needed job-technical skills (meaning the skill set I must have for this pursuit) & soft skills (those are the skills that make you a successful person in work, life, school, etc.) I want to want this.

So, because I haven't been getting through the training I'm still only on Level 2 Lesson 4 currently, which is setting up domain website emails. Those are the two tasks I've completed so far. I feel like I'm going slow now that I look at myself. I need to get to Level Three soon as possible! I got goals here lol, but I also must prioritize school & home responsibilities.

Random thoughts:

I don't know how to add my own pictures to my profile. This bothers me because I want to show pictures of my notebook that I use sometimes & pictures of my new glasses, and change my profile picture to match my every other profile picture. I don't like this limitation but I acknowledge that I haven't really taken the time to change it much either, even though it's bothered me since I first joined WA.

Small update: ok so thank you @Newme202 once again, she commented a quick guide to adding/editing profile pictures.

Also, it'd be cool if we could schedule posts here like we can schedule emails to send out (I'm only a Google user though, and I don't know if other emails do that too)? New thought: apparently premium members can only post 1 thing to WA a day for the first 3 months, and as I'm writing this I know I wrote 1272 words on it yesterday, and I couldn't post it yesterday. And now I can't post it still. By 1 post a day, does that mean you get a post every exact 24 hours? Another thing is, technology & math are so not my strong suit. So I was looking for this in my drafts and sometimes I found it, other times I didn't. That annoys me, but it's not like I can blame WA since I'm aware of my difficulties with technology... not that I'd be mad at WA itself, I'm just frustrated I don't understand as well as I'd like to. And, that was 178 words that I wrote today.

Income Goals:

Because I'm in school and haven't graduated yet, I have very few bills, and all my bills are optional. Sometimes I make a few bucks babysitting my siblings, but that's not entirely reliable. I have a $37 monthly phone bill (super cheap & I'll own my phone before I graduate! love my deal lol) and then the $49 monthly WA subscription bill plus the foreign transfer fee. These are also my only tools needed as of right now. However, I also owe myself about $400 in savings &/or investments, and I want to have saved 3 or 6 grand by next year in addition to that $400.

I want a car, a driving permit, and to travel to Anchorage to bring a friend & I to AFN's Alaskan Native Elders & Youth Conference in October next year. I want to because I've gone once before on a school field trip and although my cultural identity is white/American I'm 75% Alaskan Native on certain papers, and I love the stories. I want to bring my friend because of her personality: she's a person down with hunting, cold weather, and virtually anything outdoorsy. She has grown up around a lot of natives like me, which means that's a huge part of her cultural experience. And in case you're wondering, "why is she wording this like this?, is she in college or something?," no I'm not in secondary school. I'm a high schooler and I've already learned a lot of things, outside of math. Math is very difficult for me, it's my weakness. I'm one of those people who use a calculator for everything. Thankfully, due to me having an IEP (Individualized Education Plan) I can honestly probably get away with it even after Quarantine will be over (right now it's ethically grey unless I ask to use a calculator since we're all online). Anyways, that's way off topic lol.

Almost all of the above means I want to make at least $600 a month before next October to pay myself back that $400, save &/or invest about 6 grand by then, pay for my phone bill, pay for my subscription here, and save change up as my spending money. I don't go out much & public transportation is currently free but usually $4 total, plus about $3 to stay in my favorite cafe respectfully or at least $1 to buy a day old cookie from the cafe. My outings are decently cheap, but since I've been doing badly in school lately that price is about to go up significantly if I don't pull myself together much better. I haven't decided whether I think of WA as an investment or more of a social media platform. I want to think of it as an investment, but I don't want to lose any interest that could come either. I guess that depends on how well I do here & how patient & consistent I'll be.

I also realized that I'd prefer about $602 per month because of the foreigner fee thing, and because that'd be easier to save up my spending money with.

*Daaay-ummm, this has been a really personal post so far.*

I will likely be busy with school the next week or so but I will be working towards my goals still.

Update 12/17/20:

So far I haven't gotten much closer to my goals. I've raise my English grade above a D which is good, however as English is my strongest suit I expect at least a B out of myself. I'm still failing my most difficult class, & I expect at least a high D, but I'd prefer to earn a solid C. I've done some research for my website since I last updated, but I still gotta work on it. But I have to do better in school first. As for my habits, I'm doing a bit better. I've talked to a few of my friends a few times since I last wrote on here (which was 12/10/20). So that's helping a little too. My internet issues are setting me back again in school... I honestly don't know what it is though. Maybe it's because of my current snow storm & big work-trucks driving around? I don't know. If I did I'd fix it better. I had a small setback because I needed a mouse for some of my schoolwork, but I got a really nice one from a thrift store so that would shove me forward now... or at least once I can use the program I needed it for. Umm, I'm still not exercising enough, but I did walk about 3 miles when I got my mouse, so that's good. I also started an assignment for my most difficult class & turned in some school work for English.

FRI 12/25/2020 update

I added a Y to the end of P.U.S.H. I'm starting to want more things for myself & get rid more things at the same time. As in, there's more & more life/living that I want to do & less & less stuff I'm wanting to keep. I threw away a whole medium-ish dumpster size worth of stuff I didn't want anymore. And I still want less in my room. I'm wanting more things that contribute more to living- like for example, "Santa" got me a special camping gadget that I can't wait to try! It's a hammock cover thing, but I need to learn how to set up my hammock independently before I can try to figure my new gadget out. I'm also getting into makeup now. (Yeah, I'm both girly-girl & tomboy. So what?) My Stepmom tells all FOUR of her girls, which includes me, "a girl can do anything she wants to in heels, it's her choice. Who says she won't be killing it in those heels anyways?!" So makeup to me isn't about looking prettier, it's about trying something new & having fun, & it's something I can do that makes me happy. An activity I enjoy but could live without, if that makes sense. Plus, sometimes my youngest sister will startle at the way I do my makeup. I love coming out if my room with blue or purple lips & watching her reaction. 😂😈😂 Anyway, I'm gonna go now. Merry Christmas, happy New Year's, & happy holidays!

SA 12/26/2020 update

I'm writing this first thing in the morning. I woke up & actually felt ready to roll. I thought about what I should do today to work closer to my goals, & I felt determined to be closer rather than tired of how far I have to come. Which is good. Really good. I read Newme202's blog post from earlier this morning about not making excuses, and I'm more determined to work closer to my end goals. I got this. I know I'm capable. I know I can do this.

(Update after being awake for two hours.)

Ok, so I'm tired again. I probably just need to exercise or eat. I really like reading @Newme202's blog posts. Simone is so inspiring to me. Anyways, I decided to update because I read her post about counting the small wins. So I'm gonna do exactly that. I have a vague idea of what I want to get done today that will help me walk that much closer to my goals. Today's task list is going to be simple. I have to start simple anyways. I need to do my laundry, walk over a mile total today (I can walk six miles one day & then 8 the next with only some soreness), clean my desk, and clear my bedroom floor up. It's a mess, and having a messy room is not helpful to me at all. I still wanna get rid of some clothes too... there's so much I want to do, to get done but I'll have to limit myself to my little checklist & then after I complete that, write another one just as simple. And I'll just keep going like that, cause that's what worked best for me in the past.

(Afternoon update)

I've now cleared up desk off, & I'm confident that I've walked just over a mile. I forgot about my laundry though... in the washer. Ooops. 😅 I hope that it doesn't stink now. 😂 So after I finish my laundry my next goals slash tasks are to clean my glasses so I can see better, and look at a vision board link I vaguely remremember Newme202 putting in one of her blog posts. I'm curious about vision boards, I've never made one. Seems like something I should try though. ➡️ So the vision board turned out to be less of a collage which is what I thought it was & more of a mental map or equation, or a list of steps to get you from point A to point B. In that post Simone writes out five steps she uses to keep her business successful. I'll be looking at that post a lot in the future I think.

Evening update.

Ok so far today I've walked over 2 miles total, cleared my desk off & tidied it up, washed (& dried) my laundry, gotten rid of some clothes today, tidied my bedroom floor up (or down I guess lol), written on this post today (obviously), read multiple blog posts, started a vision photo album as motivation, and been decently happy today. There's still a lot to do to get closer to achieving my goals, but everything I did in my list above nudged me that much closer to my goals. Tomorrow I'll need to go through my room & deep clean it along with my family's regular sunday deep clean assigned household room.

Tomorrow's task list:

WATER yourself & plants *says that to self then laughs at dorky-ness*

Finish My Laundry

Wash My Bedding

Clean Kitchen (?)

Vacuum Bedroom Floor- everywhere!!!

find bluetooth

no extra eating (eat breakfast, snack, dinner- I've eaten a lot for the holidays & I'm feeling some consequences which means I should avoid various foods to avoid the consequences I don't like. Since we get sandwiches for lunch tomorrow I'm skipping lunch. It's not like that'll hurt me to do so. What I need to focus on is eating my plants. Meats & milk I get plenty but I've eaten too many sugars & breads the last week or so which means I really need my plants. I'll probably have coffee in the late morning through late afternoon to keep my insides healthy & to caffeinate my cleaning process lol.)

treadmill if possible... or dance a lot while cleaning for more exercise

quote from Simone's wall post:

"Let us try to identify our excuses and whatever is holding us back to be the best version of ourselves and push past it to give ourselves the success we know we deserve

Until next time,

Simone"

She wrote that after I updated my post yesterday, so I guess that means I need to ask myself that... I know what's holding me back. I know I can be P.U.S.H.+Y & get through it as she says anyone can to be the best version of myself. That reads so confusing but I think you guys will get what I'm saying lol. Anyways, I'm tired so I'm going to go to bed soon, which means I'll just take my leave now, lol. Good... whatever time it's at wherever you're at. Happy holidays, and especially happy New Year's!!!