Mother's Day Reflections

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8 years ago

My mom had me when she was 19. She named me Tabatha, with this particular spelling, because she saw it in the credits of an episode of Bewitched. Her cravings were 7/11 cherry pies and mountain dews. She went into labor at the laundr-o-mat, and called her Aunt and sister - Aunt to take her to the hospital (she didn't have a car), and sister to finish her laundry.

Arriving at the hospital having only visited a OB once during her pregnancy, they placed her in a room, and left her alone. She was an uninsured teen mom, with no records regarding how far along she was, and they said she would be there a long time. She didnt have an confirmation of if I would be a boy or gril, but she only picked out a girl name. 3 hours later, I was "caught" by a nurse responding to my mom's scream the baby was coming. No drugs, no help, no baby daddy present, no doctor. My mom is 5 feet tall when she stands up straight and weighed 95 pounds when she got pregnant. I was born on a Monday in March, weighing 9 pounds, 8 ounces, and only 19" long. I was a butterball. We didn't have an easy life. My sister was born 15 months later, and my mom fashioned a crib for her from a large drawer of a dresser. But my mom did the best she could. She is now a Master's Degree educated, 21 year veteran middle school science teacher and administrator. She helps me with my children while I have gone through my own very difficult times.

This morning, I remembered the day I had my daughter - my eldest (I have three younger boys). First contraction to birth was 6 hours. I remember have a lot of anxiety before I had Sophie and asking my mom about the pain (I've only had an effective epidural once because of the unpredictable pace of my labors), and she said "Oh, you were a big baby and I had you natural, I don't even remember the pain. Once you see the baby, you forget. It's in our biology." After I had my daughter, I looked at my mom and said, "You lied to me, that was the worst pain of my life, I will never every forget it. Biology my a$$."

But no reason to make you dread the inevitable when you could look forward to it instead

Her reply: "Of course I remember it, I thought I was dying. And I remember it like it was yesterday. But no reason to make you dread the inevitable when you could look forward to it instead." She went on to say that though you may never forget the pain of childbirth, what you cherish is the baby and that's why people keep on having them. ;-)

A bit of a life lesson in there somewhere I think.

What's your biggest life lesson from your Mom/Mum?

(My sister and I - we are only 15 months apart, and as adults I'm only an inch taller - she just got off to a slow start. :-))