Developing A Thick Skin When it Comes to Comments
As you grow you in your online business and start getting traffic, you will see some really rude comments that get left on your website. That is just part of doing business online. You will get many inappropriate and angry comments. There are thousands of rude people out there and unfortunately, in the computer world, you will see a lot of people that are just mean.
I received some private messages from people in my network who were justifiable upset because someone left a rude comment on their website and asked my opinion for what they should do. I want to remind everyone when you receive such comments to do the following:
- Do not take it personally. Most of the time, it is directed at you, but something that you wrote about which struck a cord with them.
- You probably will get many hateful comments especially when doing product reviews.
- Remember that there are many online scams out there and people will defend those scams and say hurtful things to you, but just take them with a grain of salt.
You know in your heart that what you are doing here at Wealthy Affiliate is the right path for you and you are helping others while making money for yourself. Listen to your inner voice and not the external voices as seen on comments or elsewhere.
Here is an example of some mean comments I came across when I was researching Windows 10. Totally mean and unnecessary comments to someone who took time to create a helpful video tutorial on Windows 10.
So, keep your chin up and your spirits high and you will succeed. Don't let angry bitter people get in your way. You can simply delete or edit those comments and move on towards your goals.
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Recent Comments
99
Great post and awesome advice. Sadly many people find pleasure in the negative and almost enjoy provocation sometimes for no reason at all. A simple response in a calm and positive fashion usually sorts it, shows your other readers and followers that you rise above and, almost the icing on the cake, usually sends the annoyance back where it belongs to the initial negative commenter because they don't get any emotive response which was sought. Great blog again Stephanie
Thank you
Hi Jason!
You are right people finding pleasure in the negative and almost get delight from provoking others. Negativity can be crazy, vicious cycle and ironically, the more you try to rationalize it, the more you tend to only think about it and in turn become more upset.
One of the things I told one of my WA friends when they sent me a copy of a really hurtful comment they received on their website was to stop allowing people who do so little for you control so much of your mind, thoughts, feelings and emotions.
Thank you Jason!
Steph
One could also perceive negative/hurtful comments as something inevitable along the path to success, even as a proof that you are doing the right thing. Dogs bark and the caravan moves. ;-)
That is absolutely true. You need to have problems in order to show progress. If you do not have these types of encounters and problems, then you are obviously not making any progress.
Personally I prefer negative comments if they are constructive. I can then learn and improve the site. But pointless rude comments are not appreciated, luckily for me they have been few and far between
Hi Kirby!
Absolutely. Constructive feedback is indeed something we want, but sometimes folks may get the other kind you spoke about - the pointless rude comments that do not help at all.
How is everything going for you by the way?
Steph
Getting positive and negative reactions is a good thing. Because it means you are not neutral to your public. They either like you, or they hate you. It means that the website author is someone with an opinion and that always makes "in favor" (1/3) and "against" (1/3) and : neutral (1/3). One can get a group of fanatic followers (and buyers?) from that 1/3.
That is because they think you mean what you say.
That is better than that you only get neutral comments (3/3) when somebody thinks "I do not care at all about this website, so let's just be friendly in my replies, and be neutral".
Another note: I remember that a colleague of mine went for a job interview and she said that that people were so negative and they were so critical of here. I said (out of intuition): "that means they are really interested in you, they want to find out if you are really as good as they think you are". "It would be bad if they were just pollite and did not stress you, that do that with uninteresting candidates". And indeed she got that job. So negative remarks can be part of testing what you are about, trying to lure you out of your shell.
Hi Bas!
I have not thought about it that way, but you are right. There are basically three different types of readers who come to your website and you have broken it down nicely!
Steph
Oh...That is funny you mention that, because I have been in that exact situation. I have had job interviews just like that.
As usual Steph, I love your stuff. One thing I would like to recommend is this:
No matter what kind of comment you receive, answer them all. What I have learned is that it is important not to be afraid to show your readers the negative comments and your responses to them. Shows a position of strength. and confidence in your message.
As for answering them, just remember to think it over clearly and calmly and defend your points in a calm and logical manner.
I have had some derogatory comments and after thinking long and hard and following kyle's example, I decided to take these negative people on and rise above.
A very good friend of mine once told me:
"You can say anything you want to, it all depends on how you say it."
Hi Polly!
Good hearing from you and yes, absolutely. My mom always refered to it as taking the high road and something I believe in too. Many thanks Polly!
Steph
Thank you for this advise, I'm new to WA and find evidence every day that the WA family is very kind, helpful and supportive. This is yet another piece of helpful advise that proves you all rock. Best wishes to you :-)
Very true, and helpful post, Steph. As someone who has been in the arts, entertainment, and literary writing fields all my life, I developed skin fit for a rhinoceros a long time ago, lol.
But it is always good to remind ourselves to not take things personally and to "consider the source" before even considering the content of harsh and/or barbed feedback we get.
Absolutely - considering the source and where it is coming from is good. I have worked in the literary field too and you are right when it comes to maintaining a thick skin. Working with and writing web content is definitely something that will undoubtedly either break you completely or to teach you to have thick skin. I hope we can all strive for the latter here right?
Just remember that these comments and actions can only hurt you if you let them. Reaction in defense usually leads to further harassment.
That is very true Helen. I have people in my face-to-face life who try that technique on me as well.
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Hi Steph, I enjoyed reading the post and also the comments.
Hi John!
I have been enjoying all the comments too. Great ideas and much more inspiration to be had through the comments left here. Thank you everyone for all the insight and ideas here.
Steph