Serious Business: Important Update.
Here's what my PC has done for me recently - got me spending lots of $ and laughing hysterically!
Captain's Log: 25 May 1949:
Ship arrives in Melbourne, Australia, after an uneventful journey from the other side of the galaxy. Air is fresh and fit to breathe. Natives here look remarkably similar to us, but speak a strange language. They appear to be friendly and helpful.
25 May 2014:
65 years on this island. Have traveled to many parts of it. Beautiful one day, magnificent the next. Have found a shelter on the edge of the bush. Have befriended a small quadruped who keeps me warm at night. I have named her "Jessie" and she's a bitch.
Now, technology has improved to the point where people need special devices to communicate with each other. They have to keep poking and stroking and prodding these plastic doodads with their fingers. They keep staring at these doodads and sometimes display a range of one or two emotions. Conversation has died.
My old heavy and bulky communication device malfunctioned. Repairing it has taken an inordinate amount of time and resources. Mother board is still upset and won't talk to the father board. Or the key board. I've been told I need to do a hard up on my back drive, whatever that means. Very frustrating - device doesn't think the way I do. Old methods were slower, but much more reliable. Must now go and feed my carrier pigeons.
2 June 2014:
Winter has set in. Sunny, 20 degrees. Can't wait for Summer.
Contact re-established with friends on other communication devices. Must exchange more words with them again.
IMPORTANT UPDATE!
It has been brought to my attention that you can now get "Speech Recognition" software.
This will allow you to converse - albeit one way - with electronic doodads, by speaking into a special device, a bit like a very small telephone receiver.
There are now, apparently, electronic doodads which can also talk to you. Amazing!
"At the next intersection, make a right turn."
Problem: There is a sign there saying: "NO ENTRY" so you have to go straight ahead. "Where possible, make a U Turn..." "Re-calculating..."
HA! I had speech recognition when I was about 1 year old - long before such electronic doodads were even invented! As I recall, the first voice I ever heard was female, but it was not in the least irritating.
:) george
Recent Comments
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So good to have you back! Hope you got all those strange things to cooperate with each other once again and have a functional computer. We have missed ya!
Hope you get your computer liking its mother and father boards......maybe you could get the pigeons to fly it to a computer geek guy.....;)
G'day, Sheila - thanks for visiting from the other side of the Pacific! Goodness knows what those boards get up to when I'm not looking... What did we have before geeks came on to the scene? Were they "Eggheads"? Even then, they were scrambling brains! Apart from my pigeons, I have a collection of tin cans and a long roll of string!
:) george
Good stuff as ever George. On the positive side, if it wasn't for all this technology we wouldn't be having this (21st century version of) a conversation.
Sad to see people sat in cafes these days though staring into their phones instead of talking to each other around the table.
Hilarious, but very sad and true, Gary!
MY PC had been constantly switching itself off in the middle of anything and everything. Very frustrating!
The first local PC repair bloke I saw immediately lifted the lid on the PC and identified 5 burnt out capacitors. "Easily fixed - cupla days..."
On the 3rd day, I called in - but he was out. On the 4th day when I called in, the answer was: "Sorry, I couldn't get my soldering iron hot enough to remove and replace them!" Eh??? This is supposedly a PC repair shop I was sure he would've had a new fangled electric one, rather than one heated by a kerosene pump-up torch.
Off to the next place, on the following Monday (involving a round trip of 200 km) to a computer refurbishment company. Again - "easy fix - cupla days..." Phoning them on the 3rd day, it was decided that it would be more effective to install a "new" reco motherboard and $10 for return delivery. Reasonable, but still $160 all up. Oh well...
With no delivery by Friday, another call to try and track down the errant PC. It was in a courier delivery warehouse (so the fix was left to the last possible minute) and would be delivered on Monday (today) which happily, it was.
With great excitement, I reconnected everything and: "This Version of Windows 7 is illegal!" WTF??? After a lot of binding in the marsh, I managed to locate the 25 digit product code and typed it in. "This is not a recognised code!" More WTFs!!!
Phoned the people who supplied the computer. Apparently, due to the change in the motherboard, I needed to re-install Windows and they would send me a disc to do so - FOC, fortunately! Still, I need to back up all my files to an external HD, which I fortunately have, as the PC's HD would be wiped. I would be issued with a new product code, which I'll be happy to submit to stop the constant stream of messages urging me to activate my Windows.
Of course, the people who fitted the motherboard had no idea that this would happen, being experts in their paddock.
Something will happen. Cupla days....
:) george
George you wouldn't believe the number of people I have had ask me over the years to look at their computers because the repair shop who fixed them didn't fix them properly.
There should be good money in it but a lot of the local businesses fail because they don't learn to do the job properly, they open up for business and think all they have to do is just replace parts, which they do at double the price they paid to buy them in for (just look on alibaba.com at the prices for PC parts from China, if you can get through the minefield of scammers that is). And of course you're not likely to be getting a genuine replacement part - most people wouldn't know the difference.
Surveillance measures have been unsuccessful making rescue attempt non-feasible. Confidence of your return was not lost as your training and knowledge of the prime directive at WA (to boldly go, learn and initiate successful programs) has not been compromised. Communication reestablished. "Live long and prosper."
Thanks for the "Live long and prosper" message Cathy, as I was in grave doubt about doing either one or the other! My reply to Gary, (coolcity) above, explains what happened. Old Codgers still have perseverance, if nothing else!
:) george
Thanks, Pat - I've discovered that the capacity of capacitors is limited. So is the capacity of some people to fix the problem without creating new ones! Anyhow.... back on line again!
:) george
You're not wrong there. As an electrician myself, I dread having to phone up a repair centre having checked everything there is to check and informing them of the same, only for some moron on the other end to say something like "Are you sure it was switched on Sir?"
"After 50+ years of switching on electrical items I think I've kinda got past that stage don't you?" - usually results in an embarrassed silence at the other end of the phone.
Five minutes of useless questions usually ends with "I think you're going to send it in for repair Sir".
Yes I know, that's what I told you five minutes ago when I called you.
Hello George, I live in South Africa and winter has started to set in here as well. Cold this morning, 16 deg. C but starting to warm up now.
Love your sense of humor and good to hear from you again.
Captains Log Eshowe: 25 Nov. 1941.
Garth
G'day, Garth - good to see the vintage generation chiming in! Winter is OK, provided there are some positive degrees. Anything less than zero & I feel it in my bones and creaking joints. Global warming should fix things, eh?
:) george
Fantastic George, love yer 'hard up on the back drive' and yes that is about as meaningless as a whole lot of the other gobbledy-gook we older folk have to grasp before we even open up our emails. And also, who said WordPress is as easy as MS Word. aaaargghhh, no way! Sorry to hear about your PC but glad to hear you've got some alternative communication devices and many friends left.
Hang in there Old Codger, cheers, Simon
PS. Captain's Log Sydney: 17th July 1949. SS Ranchi.
G'day, Simon - I'm glad someone knows what I mean! "Word" I can cope with - the "Press" bit... often tempted to use the percussion method on the keyboard. As a coincidence, on the day you arrived, my 3rd birthday was celebrated!
:) george
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You're funny, George! I'd love to see your environment.....I'm jealous! But actually I have a pretty nice one myself (next to Idaho and Canada). But it sure would be nice to be close to a sandy beach....;)
G'day, Sheila - I'm about 40-50 miles from the nearest sandy beach. We should arrange a location exchange, where I could live for a while on your 10 acres with your farm animals, and you live in a little caravan on the edge of the bush. I'd have to leave my Jessie here for you, to show you around!
:) george
You got a deal there, George....;) Course you get 2 dogs here....they only bite if they're hungry. No worries, mate....;)