Another Great Day On the Planet

byharmonic

260 followers

Updated 10 years ago

How helping others and letting them off the hook is really for yourself as much or more than it is for them. I found a while back, several years ago that occasional unexplained angry feelings seemed to come from nowhere. About that time I ran across a concept of virtues that kind of replaced revenge attitudes in ordinary every day situations with forgiveness. It seemed to make sense. I looked up forgiveness in a law dictionary and found it meant the complete removal of all liablity. So like you say "You owe me nothing, our slate is clean". I began to apply this especially in traffic, one place it seemed to me a few people must have planned ahead and scheduled in a day for just going around attacking others especially me. I was almost sure they left the breakfast table saying "I am going to cut off as many people as I can, stop real fast or whatever else one might imagine in highway sharing that seems to be intentional. It took a little while but pretty soon when something happened it became hard to think of any reason the alledged "attacker" really had done it on purpose at all. One reason after the other seemed to arise, perhaps they were late, could be having a tough day, a family member had died, possibily new at driving and barely able to even do it and still learning and so on. Finally even if someone did appear to be rudely on purpose cutting off someone or something else even that could be forgiven and viewed as them doing the best they can an just not understanding. It is not that it is OK, just different view on how to deal with it. I found it could be applied anywhere in any situation successfully without sacrificing my own moral ideas of self conduct. Also it can be used on ones own percieved blunders or bad days frustrated moments and just accepting it as part of the overall learning process can result in calmly finding the answer you need. Ithink it was written somewhere "Accept Everything and Totally Free Yourself" and in a way seems to relate to viewpoint or basis to work from. One can get too caught up in what they are doing to even notice they are the one creating inner worlds as things go along.

I noticed there was no more anger within me, that this forgiving of others was really a benefit for me. I realized that many we may be angry with or perhaps wish some ill upon them as though they have hurt us and deserve it often do not even know it. While someone may be happily traveling along another may be fuming, frustrated and ready to cut the entire case to prove anything and skip right to the execution step at least in concept or attitude. Yet who is effected the most? Isn't there just as much good as bad? Things are in balance so it has to be. I still use this idea today and work on making it a habit. I really feel others are doing the best they can. It may not be how I would do it and I may not approve of it yet do appreciate that everyone is trying and putting effort to the best each knows how in any given moment. Presuming negative motivation on another returns like a boomerang. Conversely postive efforts return the same.

I knew this earlier yet needed a review. Long ago in years past a list was made up of those I felt I had offended or possbiliy harmed in some way, was rude to, woke them at 3 AM for no good reason or any other possible thing and looked them up then told them I was honestly sorry about doing it. Amazing how many people became my friend just knowing that I sincerly cared about them. It really works and you will benefit as much as others finding peace and tranqulity, clarity and new friends rather then potential enemies. Making a list of those who I felt had harmed or offended me and vowing revenge had led me to a path of misery of my own making. Oddly, wishing things upon others is wishing it upon ones own self yet often not seen. One of the first things we learn here is that helping others is what will lead to success! So glad to be here where there are a lot of folksare wishing other folks well and growing together in a positive way.