If Plan A is no longer an option, you gotta go to Plan B
Last Update: Aug 14, 2017
As I have gotten older, I seem to have more of a thirst for the psychological aspect of the very complicated human being.
Don't get me wrong, driven by my firm belief that people are the most valued asset, for years I have read a fair amount and studied a lot on the subject to try to excel in Business Management. I have also tried to figure out my best friend (wife) for more than 30 years. (I'm still working on that one too).
Maybe my current increase in interest stems from a drive to truly understand the audience for success in an online business. So, I keep researching and reading and continue to try to learn more.
I gleaned some interesting insights on facing adversity from a book, titled Option B. I do admit, it was much deeper read than what I had anticipated. The book is subtitled, "Facing Adversity, Building Resilience and Finding Joy". It is written by Sheryl Sandberg (COO at Facebook) and Adam Grant (a Psychology professor at Wharton).
Most of us unfortunately face setbacks in our lives for varying reasons. These complications thrown our way challenge us by delivering unforeseen adversity, testing our resilience and certainly dampening our joy. It is not always easy to bounce back.
The author, Sheryl lost her husband suddenly, far too soon. The book title stems from an incident that happened just weeks after her husband's death. She was speaking to a good friend who had just volunteered to help her out at an event. She blurted out that she wanted her husband. The friend put his arms around her and said, "Option A is not available, so let's just kick the shit out of option B".
The book identifies the three "P"s as challenges that make bouncing back difficult.
1. "Personalization" - We somehow believe that we are at fault
2. "Pervasiveness" - A belief that the event will affect every aspect of our lives.
3. "Permanance" - We believe that the effects of the event are going to last forever.
Interestingly, research has shown that once we realize whatever happened to us was not all of our fault, it will not affect everything in our lives and it will certainly not follow us around forever, we will recover much, much faster.
The last "P" I find is the most difficult to overcome. WA seems to be a great place to get daily inspiration and help reinforce the belief that things will get better. Unfortunately, I have to drown that little voice (I call him Beelzebub) who sometimes taunts me and says, Nah, things are not gonna get better, you're a dreamer". This is when I look at my favorite quote, "be Grateful for today's blessings, say something Good to inspire someone else, Live every single moment, Laugh often every single day and Love beyond words, and then I check my WA mail. That seems to be enough and he is easily silenced.
The book Option B reiterated to me, like history does, that there are people all over the world who have found resilience from all kinds of adversity including unforeseen death, loss, injury, illness and financial set backs.
I hope that you all find joy in all of your lives no matter what is happening now or what happens so that you can be there for others and for yourselves.
Like my very good and dear friend Eric always says, "We got this".