Fretting Over How to Get Started?

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Are you like me?

Do you wonder and worry if you are doing it right?

Do you start on one thing - then you are off on a different tangent?

Are you unsure of what is expected?

We should have a 12-step support group because there are millions like us. In fact, I usually go so far as to wonder how it is that everyone else seems to have what it takes to do the work and I don't. I'm sure you can relate to that too, huh?

Everyone has that little voice of self-doubt that seems to tell you that everyone else has it right and you have it wrong - or at least not as right as anyone else. That self doubt is a part of every human, it is something that we need to work at to overcome, so that we eventually trust ourselves. But until we get to the point that we do have self-confidence there are a few things you can do to work around that doubtful feeling.

First and foremost: Remember that you are not alone! Everyone has that self-doubt. Many people have learned to work with it so that it doesn't show outside of themself. But they still have to deal with it internally.

So rule number one is to not allow that doubt to stand in your way of progress. It will quite often talk people out of doing what they want to do because they feel inadequate. Don't let that happen to you.

If you have the desire to do it - You have what it takes to make it happen!

When you hear the self-doubt statements inside you, teach yourself to identify them as self-doubt statements and ask yourself if they are really true. Most of the time people accept them as their truth without even a single question. When you do question their truth, they usually fizzle out because they are not true. Question the doubts, why are they there? are they truthful? if you do some research and learn something new will that overcome the doubt? Don't let self-doubt ruin your life.

Be strong against self-doubt. You ARE strong enough to do anything you set your mind to do. You can always learn something new, don't let lack of knowledge deter you.

In order to quiet those self-doubt fears, do research, ask questions, try out a few things before jumping in. That way when you do jump in you can do it with greater confidence.

There is no one right way to do anything. However, there are some guidelines on the best ways that will bring success. By finding a support organization, such as Wealthy Affiliates you have gathered a support group with a great deal of clout around you. This should bring you the confidence that you may feel is lacking. For some people however, self-doubt says things like: I don't fit in here because everyone else knows more than I do. If that happens to you speak directly to that statement in a strict tone and say: No way, that is a lie, I am welcome and I do belong and while I may not know a lot right now, there are plenty of things to learn and plenty of people willing to assist me in learning it. So shut up self-doubt, I am going to make this happen no matter what you think.

Don't listen to crazy self-doubt statements - observe them, and state your real truth, that you will learn and succeed no matter what.

The next important thing to remember is that you are not required to get it right the first time. It is okay to make adjustments to your work. It is okay to ask for help, it is even okay to really mess it up the first few tries. The beauty of messing up is that you learn from your mistakes and you can correct them as you learn. Eventually you will look back at your first attempts and have a feeling of great accomplishment because you have such an improved product after you have learned a few new things.

Don't be afraid to fail, because that will keep you from succeeding.

Remember when you were a kid and you were encouraged to try, no matter what? Do you still have that kind of attitude? If you don't then you should be looking into the self-judgement that you are applying to the things you do. Many people as they grow begin to limit themself, and eventually stop trying new things because they are afraid to fail.

There isn't a single person who was born knowing everything they know today. As a human we learn something every day. Be willing to admit that you don't know something now, but know that you can learn it, and go find the resources that will help you gain the confidence to be able to accomplish your goals.

Just Do It!

It may take you a few more steps, because you need to learn more about how to do something. But you are fully capable of learning it, or hiring it done for you if it is too technical.

Don't allow self-doubt to get in the way of your success!

I hope you are inspired to get out there and move closer to your desired goal.

by: Wendy Mae, Ph.D.
Academy of Spirit

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Recent Comments

22

Nice post self doubt really can knock us down so we need to find ways to remain positive and push forward

You are right KatieMac, self-doubt can knock you down at any moment along any topic. But when you have a positive attitude and a desire to maintain it, that judgement and doubt has a much harder time taking hold.

Have a wonderful holiday season!
-Wendy

Thank you Wendy hope you have a wonderful Christmas to and wish you every blessing for 2016

Thank you for this post! Self doubt can come creeping in when you least expect it!! This perspective helps tremendously in all aspects of life, not just for Wealthy Affiliate. Thanks again!!

You are right Margarethe, self-doubt can creep in and knock you off your path at any moment, and the info in this post is helpful in being able to deal with that feeling of crashing into negativity and self-judgement. Best wishes to your being able to overcome self-doubt.

Merry Christmas!
-Wendy

Great post. I actually had a moment last night about the post I was doing. Then just thought to myself you have to publish no point in doubting it won't get you anywhere. then just carried on writing.

Good Job James! It is awesome that you didn't let doubt get you so beat up that you ended up killing the post. That is what most end up doing. Wishing you continued success in all that you do!
-Wendy

The Mind is indeed a very awkward customer sometimes, self doubt is a very real problem with me but I have overcome that doubt by getting to grips with taking action and when stuff turns out ok the the self doubt tends to take a hike for a while.

Good Job Gary! So many get bogged down by their self-doubt that it prevents them from moving forward in any way. It is very empowering to overcome that feeling and move beyond the self-imposed disability. Keep moving forward!
-Wendy

Thank you for this - I had a day of self-doubt yesterday and this is where a community like WA shows its worth - the more blogs I read this morning, the more I was inspired and the self-doubt vanished.

I am so glad that my blog helped you bring your self-doubt under control. Moving forward to the next step in keeping it managed: Remember how it felt to be under the influence of self-doubt, also remember the joy in having the doubt vanish. It will help you have less doubt next time, and eventually you will live self-assured.

-Wendy

I am so glad that my blog helped you bring your self-doubt under control. Moving forward to the next step in keeping it managed: Remember how it felt to be under the influence of self-doubt, also remember the joy in having the doubt vanish. It will help you have less doubt next time, and eventually you will live self-assured.

-Wendy

Great article Wendy. I'm currently doing the bootcamp however, constantly deliberate/procrastinate over whether I should just follow my passions.

Best ever wishes

Hi LaurenceW, I am now following you!
What are your passions? If they aren't building an affiliate website then why are you working to learn how to do that?
Sometimes that self-doubt that I spoke about in the article will use nasty little tastics like trying to tell you that something you don't wish to do will be better, and will make more money, quicker. It will try to distract you in a million ways.

It is your job to go deep inside yourself and figure out what it is going to take to make your heart sing, make you walk 5 feet off the ground - then do that!

You need to be doing whatever it is that makes you happy. That is where you will create success. Even if your self-doubt is not onboard with the idea. Afterall, it is self-doubt's job to distract you. It is your job to tell it to shut-up and go success in spite of self-doubt.

My best wishes to you my friend!
-Wendy Mae, Ph.D.
Academy of Spirit

You PREACH ON and I'LL SAY AMEN!!! Great article - I needed to hear that, because I'm KICKING MYSELF that I have been working at my DAY job so much for the last couple of weeks, that I have not blogged or trained or worked on my websites AT ALL for about 10 days....... but YOU'RE reminding me that IT"S OK - I'm working on it when I have a chance, and I am NOT quitting, or jumping to another project, instead of working on THESE projects here at Wealthy Affiliate, so thanks for your article!!!! :-D

Great to hear this just do it when you feel it is right for you as we will always be here for you - not a problem

Hi apbridges60, I am so glad that you shared your situation. My #1 advise to you would be just do your VERY BEST each day. Some days the outside world will pull you off track. But write a list of your priorities so that you don't get too caught up in the outside distractions and are reminded about your own goals. As soon as you can get back on track, do. And feel proud that you pulled yourself out of the weeds of distraction and got back on track. You will succeed!!! You have drive and determination, that's what it takes!

Best Wishes!
-Wendy

thanks again Wendy for the pep talk - I cannot quit my day job yet, because it pays the bills and I ACTUALLY LIKE doing my family group conferencing with families whose children are in foster care, but I'm looking forward to having my FIRST SALE, or FIRST REFERRAL, and EVERYONE AT WA WILL KNOW ABOUT IT FIRST!!!! You keep up the great job too of encouraging all of us!!

hello Wendy and that is a very nice post and so true in every way and I alway say just go with your gut feeling as that is the one that counts
best regards paul

That's true Paul, I wish everyone could just go with their gut feeling, it would sure help them get further along in all things in life.

Thanks for the comments!
-Wendy

yes it really would as people need to believe inthem selves and not what the media believes in - right

absolutely!

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