Parents not Understanding
I'm a very independent woman. I grew up miserable. My parents were't poor, but they were very strict. I didn't get to do much but read when I was a child. I moved out when I started college at 17 as soon as possible, because my mom has a mental illness and is a serious drug addict. I lived on my own for 8 years, then my money situation got bad and I'm back at the parents house. I understand my parents love me and I pray on a daily basis.
Only issue is they have issues with me. They're late baby boomers who are very conservative, my dad works for the government and mom was an RN. Our opinions are very different, which is the only thing we share btw. I just think it sucks that I get support, including financial for what I'm doing on this computer, but my parents I live with have absolutely NO faith in what I'm doing. They don't support WA at all. They are not impressed by my book and website, and want me to get another minimum wage job, which I already have one at walmart.
I just think this is a bummer, thing is, I'm just as bull headed as them so I will not be applying to a job at McDonald's anytime soon. Five years of college and being independent and my parents don't see my potential as a music producer who is already selling tracks. I showed my mom someone wrote and recorded a song to music I wrote. She really didn't care. They think I'm a joke because I did some stupid things in my twenties. Thats sad to me, but I know I'm in a better place working at walmart and not getting yet another minimum wage job. This blog was a rant, but thanks if you read it. I know my parents want the best for me, but they need to keep up with the ages and read some books, because soon, you want be able to find a job offline anyway. I know whats best for me.
Recent Comments
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I think the best way for you is to find a regular job with minimum salary. As for building your online business at WA is not a guarantee that you will be successful. You can do it after your working hours and when you feel that your online business grows you'll quit your regular job. That is what I am doing now.
Likewise, I work a 40 hour a week job, I'm trying to get away from that and have the life a lot of other people I meet are having.
I'm almost in the same boat so I completely understand where you're coming from. My mom wasn't as strict as your parents are but I know better than to tell her I'm doing this because she wouldn't understand. Everything I've done so far was only because she wanted it for me and me wanting it for myself. If I could do it all over again I would have never went to a 4 year university but I did because that's what she wanted from me.
I know already that she wouldn't approve of me trying to start an online business because it goes against the grain. She would rather I be miserable working a job I hate like her but I refuse.
I had to learn to keep my moves and ideas to myself because people can be so judgemental. It may hurt to not get support from the people you love but they'll understand once they see your success and you make them eat their words. :-)
I wish I'd never gone to university, it just put me in debt, but like couple said, I can get validation from people that are established in like fields so they try to see I'm serious. Thats what I should have done, not have told them.
Hi Kendall,
Its an age old story the age gap, Parents , They don't move with the times and and don't understand what motivates you.
The fact that you are living at home now, makes them think that they have the right to run your life They have a moral obligation to support you when you're trying to find your feet, its very hard for them to realize that you're an adult now and that you have to make your own way in the World,
They won't always be around to help and guide you, Tell them you appreciate their concern and that you understand they only want the best for you but that you are old enough to make your own decisions now but that you don't mind their input as long as its constructive and not destructive. If they are good parents I am sure they will understand and realize that the world that you live in now is a vastly different one from the one they grew up in all those years ago.
I am nearly 72 years young now and even I have some difficulties with my contemporaries, that don't seem to really understand how different the World is today, My sister who lives in England and is fairly modern thinking still won't use skype, I really think she believes its some sort of Magic.
Any way I am sure that if you sit down with your parents and Talk to them as a grown up that they may have an epiphany and realize that you are grown up now and treat you like an adult instead of their little girl.
Good Luck,
Raymond Bowley ( Merryman88)
Thank you for your reply. I really don't know what I expected from them after I told them. LOL They barely know how to use a laptop, what would they know about internet marketing. I have tried the grown up girl thing on numerous occasions, and I was mature, and they still talk to me like I'm 9, maybe 10. I'm 30 years old btw. I mean, they won't even let me close my bedroom door. They were very emotional abusive as I was growing up, and sometimes my mom was physically. There very dysfunctional. I think I just won't say anything to them about it anymore.
That is sad, and like most children they look for parents approval but you do not need it for if it is working for you and you can make a honest living from it surely that is something to be proud of, do not let anyone rob you of your dreams, even if it is your family some people do not understand the whole package of love, I hope you will continue on this road and in time your parents will see the full potential of who you are, As a mother I love my children at times have not agreed with some of their decisions but have given my support on them exploring the opportunities for improving their circumstances.. Hope things improve for you
Thank you my situation is already getting better quickly. I've been doing Kyle's classes and learning a lot of things. I can't see myself turning back, thanks for the support Katie.
It sounds like you have a mountain to climb to get them on your side.It is good that you have a job because it gets you out and you need that for your sanity.I think you seem to know what you are about it certainly sounds that you know you own mind and your on a good thing here.It is not easy to live with a mental illness as I know for sure and then if you are depressed on top of this leaves you feeling numb.
Just listen to your parents but sometimes we have to find our own way also.Keep praying and the Lord will show you the way,he wants what is good for you and will not lead you somewhere that is redundant.
Thank you I know things don't always come out the way you think they will, so I wll rely on God as my guide.
You may look on what you have written as a rant, but really it's important that you get stuff like this down as it's a good way for you to grow as a person..I admire your courage, it can'y be easy for you to live with so much negativity..but hey, being here at WA and learning from hundreds of others of like mind..is the best decision you can make for you personal and financial future.
Your Parents are not alone either there's many people out there who look down on what we are doing here and because of their lack of knowledge..be strong and learn what is taught here and you will succeed no matter what other say.
Be strong and have faith in yourself..
Thank you for your support, you are right, this isn't such a simple thing to do. You have to have such drive to own any type of business, but now I understand to pretty much just talk to like minded people, its kind of like talking to a wall if the person isn't briefed on what your talking about. Its like talking about rocket science to the average person.
Gee Mark that was a great answer, I did not even have to think it up this time! Zerkeses, I agree with Mark and hope home life gets better for you!
I've actually never thought of that. Me and a couple other singers were thinking about a gig, but still trying to figure out what we are going to perform.
Hi Kendall.
Sounds like you've had a tough time - I can't relate to that, but I do love your enthusiasm for music and producing.
Before I had kids, I "gigged" almost every weekend, and sometimes during the week - I did what I loved - programming/music, and a singer did the singing. Although my dream of writing for other people never materialized.
I suppose the point of my comment is - why don't you capitalize on your passion for music, and gig/DJ to earn extra money to begin with - then maybe get your mum and dad something to show you are "making it" - I don't know, tickets for a show, or a night away - just a gesture.
Small things like that may help to get them into thinking that another minimum wage job is not for you - you can generate income doing things you love, rather than things you don't care about.
Either way, I'll keep visiting your site - I hated my 25 key m-audio - I HAD to use octave too much - always go back to my K1!
All the best,
Mark
Thanks for the support. I think getting established is always the hardest part. But you are right, if I can show them that other people validate me, it won't be something they can argue with!
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I have a job with a minimum salary and I'm not quitting.