Marketing and What inspired Me to Act

byburntout

526 followers

Updated 14 years ago

 I think perhaps one of the biggest motivations when people start looking at marketing on the internet is the perception that there is immediate, fast money to be made from marketing. This perception can be targeted to all of the slick web sites that show off all the things you never had and probably never will. They misrepresent what affiliate marketing and legitimate online work is. Hence when you tell your spouse you are looking into an online business they start hitting you and immediatlely call there best friend and start crying. If a woman decides on this line of work, the man will quickly call attention to the dementia assosiated with the fairer sex, get drunk, and be stubbornly silent until she changes her mind.

Heres the real deal. Internet marketing, like any business requires hard work, a lot of it. It will take you some time to begin earning money. When I started I thought if I could click on my e-mail to open it, then I was among the top ten computer wizards in world. I have since found that this is not the case. You will need to develop some basic understanding of html and other complicated computer words. You can acheive this, as, having accomplished this task myself, it proves that any complete moron can master these skills.

You will need to develop some sort of business plan. I tried throwing a lot of money at this when I started in the belief that if I bought a bunch of internet marketing programs that I would be earning money in my sleep, just like they advertised, I did, but then I would wake up only discover it was a dream. My wifes little tiny fists beating me about the head and shoulders was not a dream though. She inspired me to begin formulating a plan. Or else!

To find any success, as is the case with anything you attempt, you should have a good knowledge of what it is you are doing. I, being a man, went fishing and acquired all of the knowledge there is about marketing. There was a moment that I knew nothing about marketing and then after opening my sixth beer and falling into the river I knew everything. I applied this new found knowledge, and, for some reason, experienced no success. My fair bride, on listening to the loose details about a possible campaign, just shook her head prettily, smiled and said: "You don't know what your talking about, do you?" A woman is never right, so I began reading everything I could possibly find on marketing, just so she could be wrong.

I developed a formula for achieving success online. I would pour some coffee in the morning  and stare importantly at the laptop screen. At noon or slightly before I would open a can of Milwaukee Blatz beer and surf the sports sites. At three in the afternoon I would open up notepad and wait expectantly for inspiration on writing for that great new niche I had thought of, but since forgot, owing the excessive amount of Blatz beer and testostarone absorbed from the sports sites. At six in the evening I would pour a scotch or brandy start clearing my throat, snorting, hrumphing and generally making noises that are indicitive of an enlightened man's literary expertise. By nine I was "asleep."

This evening was different though. At ten I was roused by what I initialy thought was the screaming of a banshee. There before my blurred eyes stood a pretty, five foot four inch, one hundred and twenty six pound, steam roller. A solid left to my unsuspecting shoulder immediately sent fire to my uninspired fingers. This was my first call to action. There after I found it easier to focus my attention on making a real effort at finding success. Please. Not that I am scared not to, after all whats one hundred and twenty six pounds of pure fury to a big, strong man like me?