Don't Let Fear Be Your Navigator

bytonysmith123

68 followers

9 years ago

I want to be a Marine!

---

Well, it was final time at the University of Oregon so that meant it was time for me to move on. I was never any good at finishing things I started. I took a few tests and had a little break. So I hitchhiked back to Carson City for a breather. While I was watching TV a really high-tech and exciting commercial came on. It was an advertisement for the U.S. Marines. That's what I needed, discipline, self-esteem, a career and stop running away from things in fear. I found a new zest for life. After all, majoring in philosophy had done nothing, but confuse me. This is the answer. I immediately got up and went to the local recruiter's office. I went through the first office with an open door and said, "I want to be a Marine". The soldier behind the counter laughed and said the Marine recruiter was next-door. I apologized when next-door and there was a sign on the window stating they were at lunch. So, I grimaced and started to walk out the building. The first gentleman that I spoke with stopped me and asked why I wanted to be a Marine. I was truthful and said they have good commercials. He laughed once again. He then invited me in to talk about joining the Army. We sat down and he started with, "You don't know too much about the military do you?" I agreed. So, he started asking questions about who I want to become, do I want to serve my country and the like. He asked if I wanted to fill out a form, one that I would have to fill out for any branch of service. So if I still wanted to be a Marine I wouldn't be wasting my time. I said, “Sure”. It was basically a brief questionnaire and short personal history.

How important are tests anyway?

He invited me to meet him and some other possible recruits that were interested to show up back at the recruiting office the next morning to take a bus up to Reno, take some written tests, and do a physical readiness test. I said, “Sure”. So the next morning I met a half a dozen other young men, boarded the bus and went to Reno. The first item of the day was the physical readiness test. This consists of push-ups, sit-ups and a two-mile run. As I had just come from the University of Oregon cross-country team and had a background in Kung Fu, performing the maximum amount of repetitions and easily winning the two-mile run wasn't difficult. The next part was what is known as the Armed Services Vocational Aptitude Battery (ASVAB). This is a series of written tests covering skills, knowledge and aptitude where the results should find a good match for your military career. I felt pretty confident in my results and was the first one finished with the tests and waited for the others to board the bus and go home. I got a call the next morning from the recruiter. The results were in and he wanted to discuss them with me at his office. I went down to the office wondering what was going to happen. He said that my scores were so high that I had qualified for any job in the service. I asked him if I could be a Ranger he said, “Of course, but there was a six-month waiting list.” I told them that if I didn't join now I probably wouldn't. So he accessed his computer again and his eyes bugged out. He said, “I've never seen an opening for this position in my seven years of recruiting.” It was an opening for a light weapons leader on a special forces “A” team.

What's a Green Beret?

I asked them what Special Forces were. He said they are the Green Berets. I asked what they were. He shook his head and asked me if I'd ever seen the John Wayne movie The Green Berets? I said, “No”. I’m sure he could sense the uncomfortable situation I was in. I was ready to leave and like any good used car salesman he redirected my focus. Well, he took me over to a large multicolored map of United States and pointed to where I would do all of my different training. He said this position is one of the most elite positions in all of the armed forces. I still didn't understand what he was saying. Well, I understood what he was saying, I just didn't realize what it meant. So, I said, “OK, where do I sign? ” Before he would let me sign my commitment, he made it very clear that if I failed any military course that I could be reassigned anywhere the Army wanted me to go. I agreed, said something dumb like “I’m a gambler”, and signed the contract. Then he said I had two weeks to get my affairs in order. I start a week from Friday. I returned home, told my mother, she didn’t even flinch, and said that it would be good for me, teach me to stand up straight and stop running away from responsibilities like a scared rabbit. I found that response true to her nature. She was an abrupt and funny person. But, her first husband died tragically on his way home from WW II. Why would she so flippantly allow her youngest son to join the military so easily? Well, she took me up to the University of Oregon, so I could pick up the rest of my things from the Quad and bring them home. I made some phone calls to let the rest of my family know what I was doing, and that was it. I was on a bus to Oakland, California. When I arrived, they put me in a hotel room with some other recruits, they left that evening to go get drunk and or laid. I stayed in the hotel and watched a movie. The movie was The Seahawk with Errol Flynn. It was kind of a military movie at least in my imagination. It motivated me a little for what was to come.

What did I get myself into?

The next day I was one of the few people who didn't look as if they were going to die from a hangover. We were given our medical tests to see if we were fit to serve our country. That wasn't very fun. But most of us were “fit” (breathing). Then they stuffed all us in a large conference room, where we raised a right hand and swore to defend the Constitution and some other things us. I'm sure they would let me know if I wasn't fulfilling my obligation. The next stop was, the Oakland Airport. We were being whisked to Fort Benning, Georgia. Here we were issued our clothing, equipment and “asked” to perform duties in a very expeditious manner or large objects would be shoved up our ass. There was also a propensity for the drill Sergeants to raise their voice for no apparent reason. And it also seems that in the ‘South’ people love to do push-ups. I was having a problem with the discipline thing. I was beginning to think I had made the wrong decision.

You want me to jump out of a plane!

After 3 months of Basic Training I went to the next phase of my military education, jump training. The training scenario here was that the instructors made you fear them more than the outcome of your parachute not opening. It worked. However, I was still deathly afraid each time I jumped out of a plane. It was almost paralyzing. But in order to earn that coveted Green Beret it was necessary.

Face down the Fear.

After another 3 months of training, I finally made it to the Special Operations training school. Living with fear was becoming ordinary. It seemed that everyday we were performing some task that had severe consequences if done incorrectly. In any week I could be stabbed, fall to my death, starve, shot, drowned or set on fire. WOW, this was a dream job (not). The University of Oregon was looking pretty good right now, but that seemed like a lifetime ago. After much soul searching, I knew it wasn't going to get better so I had better change. I had an idea. Instead of the mindset that I was the victim I would be the pursuer. So, I joined a sport parachute club. This is the exact thing that kept me up at nights and now I was going to pay for it and do it on my days off. Well, after another 50 jumps I was still concerned about jumping but it wasn't mind numbing. I learned that fear is fine. It keeps you sharp. It is panic that needs to be controlled. This is done by staring it down, and showing yourself that you are in control of it.

Fear is a Motivator.

Fear is controlled by action. Whether it is writing a blog, starting a new website or quitting your job to be self employed, fear is going to be waiting around the corner. Use it to motivate you. Do something you are afraid of and you will begin to gain control of it. I don't need to explain what you might fear, you already know. Define what you are afraid of and explore it, understand it and take action. Don't let fear paralyze your chances for success. When you face down your fear there are a hundred people who don't. This is where you will shine. Great people are not fearless. I have worked with many Medal of Honor recipients and they fear the same things we do. They just keep their eyes on the goal and take action.

If you have experience where you have overcome fear, I'd like to hear from you. It is motivating to learn how others have changed from feeling powerless to taking charge.