Perfectionism: The Enemy Of Celebration
I know many people struggle with perfectionism. I'm here to share my unique struggle with it (I believe everyone's struggles are unique even when they're struggling with the exact same thing.)
My Perfection Struggles
I get way too detail oriented, and start nitpicking on the smallest of flaws that to many may not even be visible!
This by itself is not an issue even though it definitely eats up a lot of my time. Like right now I've re-read the 5 sentences I've written so far 5 times already!
But, this isn't the real issue.
The Real Issue
The amount of energy that this detailed, zoomed in, processing saps from me leads to me eventually being like, "F#@$ this!" - I'll just put out whatever!
And so all the energy that could go into creativity ends up going into the (semi) useless correction of flaws (that many a times no one would even see as flaws)!
I was again gonna re-read the sentences written so far - but I've chosen not to!
The Other Emotional Strain
This whole perfection idea basically makes me feel like nothing is enough to celebrate. And so I end up not celebrating any of my wins!
I mean, I'm not a masochist (at times I can be though - I've got tattoos, and I seriously think that getting multiple tattoos has to have some streak of masochism to it!), so I do feel happy when I achieve small things, it does make me feel productive, etc.
However, I shy away from owning it! Like, I won't talk about it, & actually feel proud of myself.
Again, not to say keep celebrating & do no work - but all work, and no joy, does make humans sad little toys!
Breaking The Cycle
So, this is me, and I'm going to celebrate two wins right here, right now, with all you fellow travelers in the online world!
Win #1: Anti-Climax
I was in the Top 200 for about 3 days in a row! I had no intention to be there. I didn't even know it was possible for me to be there - I was just genuinely engaging in this space for those few days, & voila!
After it happened though, I could feel in every cell of me the gamification-addiction pumping up by the competitive streak in me!
A part of me could see all of this happening in my mind, and yet another part still wanted it.
And then eventually the wiser part, or the part I believe to be wiser, won :)
I'm 1165 now. And I feel at more peace than when under 200!
Win #2: The Real Deal
Yesterday, for the first time ever in the last 3 months (I began writing articles in January) I was able to complete one full article in less than half a day, and it wasn't 3000 words (I had to check myself & not add that extra section or two that my perfectionism addiction was pushing me to write!)
Yes, it took about 4-6 hours - which is a BIG win considering I'd been taking 3 days to write one article because I'd want to read research papers et al to include quotes & data from the horse's mouth!
And I wrapped it up in a little over 1200 words - another big win considering none of the others are below 2000!
Bonus Win: Hat Trick, Much!?
This is my first ever piece of content - yes, the one you're reading right now - where I haven't continually re-read the whole piece from the beginning, after every few sentences!
Mental Note To Self: I can just consciously do the same as I write my next article today!
Will you look at that! This is like inception - win within a win-based blog!
Now I'll re-read the piece & then write the wrap up!
Wrap Up
I don't want to summarize it, it's not that big a blog to need a summary with points!
But I guess, I wanna share my personal takeaway: Since I know I struggle with this idea of perfectionism & the entitlement towards instant results, I will benefit from setting up mechanisms that make me look at my work with respect to longer periods of time vs a day.
As (some people) rightly said, something to the effect: We overestimate what we can do in a day, and underestimate what we can do in a year, or a decade!
Grateful to everyone in this space, and grateful for being here!
May we all continue to grow & evolve.
Much love!
Recent Comments
12
Very well said, Shobhali! Other words for this is "Paralysis by Analysis". We can simply put things out and get them tweaked along the way, if it proves to be necessary!
Jeff
Hey there , i like your level of honesty here ! You know what they say - "How you do something is how you do everything" . In the end you are doing all this for yourself because you want to be happy with what you have done. Who knows your little details may lead you to big accomplishments ! :)
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I totally understand you here Shobhali....
Whilst we should always strive to do the best we can, forget about being perfect as it doesn't exist my friend!
Totally understandable my friend!