My first sad experience on WA.

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265 followers

I posted a question in WA a few months back with the aim to reach out and connect with any LGBT WA members in the hope that they could guide me with some ideas I had for a LGBT community website/blog I had recently created. I thought that I could get the niche advise I were looking for much easier this way. I imagined that the worst thing that could happen would be to not get any replies. I never imagined that I would get a negative response. I was always under the impression that WA members were very liberal and open minded so I didm think twice about being open and confident about who I am based on the ideas that WA would be filled with people inspired by forward thinkers and individuality. I had two responses. One not so great suggesting that I was trying to make things unequal between WA members and the other accusing me of using WA as a place to 'Pick Up' and suggesting that I was trying to create segregation within WA. I have pasted the message below...

Does sexuality even matter in this situation? It's not a place to pick up, it's a place to improve internet marketing skills and help each other earn.
I mean, go start a mini LGBT group within WA if you want, but my feeling is that everyone is better off if we DON'T segregate ourselves and we help each other regardless of sexuality, religion, race, culture or whatever.
All for one, one for all. Let me know if you need any questions answered, please help any people, straight or gay or whatever else, who need their questions answered.

I love being a member of WA and up until this point I have only had positive communication with other members. I feel sad that my message was treated with such suspicion and accusation. I felt as though I had done something terrible when I know that all my intentions were true and honest. No matter how often it happens or how subtle it can be being treated in this way really gets me down. If I had written the question in the same format but instead reaching out to illustrators instead of LGBT people I imagine that the response would had been different! I'm not someone that seeks out gay equality but I am someone that believes in equality for everyone and the power of perception. I know that the people who responded did so in the way that they did because they feel very protective over the WA community and misunderstood my intentions but I couldn't help notice that evidence of this type of response anywhere else couldn't be found and that as far as I could see my question was the first LGBT inspired question and it made me sad that it had this type of response. I guess I'm writing this in the hope that I will inspire some friendly replies,

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Recent Comments

15

Hi Mark,

I just found your blog post as I am searching to create a custom logo for my website. Your designs are inspired.

As an AfroAmerican female, I've experienced many episodes of discrimination, so I can empathize with your feelings. It hurts.

Unfortunately, many people consumed with their need to be in compliance with peers beliefs and attitudes have not achieved the elevated humanistic state to be able to embrace everyone regardless of race, ethnicity, gender, sexual orientation, spoken language, political views, age, legal, social or economic status, let alone verbalize them.

I am a member of an organization that celebrates humanity in all of its diversities & differences.

The platform WA presents is support for members new & seasoned to create a viable online marketing income.

Recently, I renewed my interest in WA. This company's mission provides the best platform for novice people like me & veterans of technology to learn & create an online marketing presence. Since my return, I see there is unlimited resources & support here.

You may be feeling discouraged or busy with other pursuits. I urge you to revisit your objectives & goals. Consider a review of website techniques the WA way. You may discover ideas to improve your website. Just a suggestion, not a judgement.

You have a special gift & talent. 'Pay it forward' as WA members say. Assist as many members as you can. It will open the way for you to achieve the recognition and acknowledgement of your peers in an acceptable & beneficial way for all concerned.

All the best to you,
Lovetta**

I had to find out what social preconceptions were at work here to get the heated response that I did to my LGBT question. As you can see from this thread I got in trouble with this question because some people believed I was trying to create divisions within WA and someone even accused me of lustful intentions, which would had been funny if it hadn't come from a really negative set of thinking. So I posted this very same question but I changed LGBT for conceptual art lovers to see if anyone would notice the same attempt to start a mini group aka 'create division' and respond in a similar way to my original question. I can't say that I was surprised by the results. I was kinda hoping I would be proved wrong but it shows that unconscious bias was at work here. LGBT people are negatively portrayed in the media and by many politicians as a threatening and inferior group, posing a danger to public health and "traditional" structures, such as marriage and the family. These views filter through to many other things like my question here. People jumped to the conclusion that I was doing something wrong but this didn't happen when I did the same question as a art lover. I know the people who responded are good people and I think we can all be a victim of unconscious bias sometimes so I dont judge. I simply post this in the hope that someone reads it and considers changing their actions for the better in some situation similar to this. Peace x

1

Hi Mark;
I'm happy to reply, my friend:)
I hope you will see and consider my response (my second reply) on you original question page.
If you read that, I hope you will see logical reason there:)

Mark, here is your quote from above:
"If I had written the question in the same format but instead reaching out to illustrators instead of LGBT people I imagine that the response would had been different!

I know how you feel (I have been a victim of bullying more than a few times in my life).
However, a group of Illustrators is a SKILL group that brings further advancement to WA projects of all stripes.
I think you can see that it is widely more pertinent to what we are all pursuing as professionals...in our livelihoods.

You are feeling hurt, and you are reacting defensively; that's natural.
Please consider tweaking your original question as per my idea for you on your good question page:)

If you ever want to PM me, Mark, I'm always open, and I care.
Yours sincerely,
Terry

dog lovers, tattoo enthusiasts, religious people, girls, boys, twins, single parents, 60+, homeowners, ginger people, nationalities, new mums, stay at home dads, dyslexic people, people with birthmarks, fans of Alan Watts, car crash survivors, people called Terry, people called Mark,.... we are and should been seen and treated equally no matter the situation. We should be free to post messages linking with people who share a skill or passion, lifestyle, interest, belief, life experience. I don't really understand your point about the difference between a message aimed at people with a skill rather than a shared experience. Many things in life can inspire or influence an entrepreneur as they research a new business/project.

None of it matters IF it is put in the right context...smthg like: '...for research for my blog'...
Again, you chose the words, 'start a discussion'...all you needed to communicate properly on a WA page was, 'start a PROFESSIONAL discussion'.

Can you see the difference, and how you would be received differently, Mark?

I'm tuckered out from trying to point this approach out to you.
Believe it or not, I wish you the very best.

Yes you are telling me that I am in the wrong and you think I have been unprofessional. Just because I am defending myself doesnt mean I dont understand. I'm sorry you think this way. I wont be repeating the mistake of trying to explain myself again. Thank you for all of your replies about this Terry.

Yours peacefully
Mark

You are welcome, Mark.
It is very hard to go through the emotions you've been going through!

With you all the way:),
Terry

Thank you Terry but please don't mistake my passion for promoting equality as being emotional!

Best Wishes
Mark

I mean that you have my total respect and support, Mark.

I'm confused. I thought you were pointing out my unprofessional errors and correcting my comments. Thank you for telling me that you respect and support me though.

You are welcome.
All the best:)

I imagine you are telling a joke that I don't get maybe. All the best to you too

I have seen and reacted on your question. I can not relay with other member statements. I read clearly in your question "start a mini WA - LGBT community", and I do repeat my opinion, I do not think mini groups are belonging here. Whatever they are standing for. Whether it is a group for LBGT, dog lovers, hairdressers, parenting, bbq-ers, it just doesn't fit here. They invented G+ hangouts for that matter.

First let me say I am an ultraconservative. One of the things you will find difference between liberals and conservatives is that liberals always want you to think the way that they think. Conservatives don't care what you think as long as your beliefs don't interfere with us.

Secondly wa is full of cyber bullies. In fact that's the one thing that I feel will eventually kill wa. I actually called them the WA Klan. It just takes one member 2 reported to the right government agency. That may have already happened.

All that being said, I will do everything I can to help anybody's business. I am sure if you can think for yourself you will find this is just the first of many of these types of experiences that you have. Best of luck to you.

Hello, I am going to politely disagree with your first paragraph and rather sadly agree with your second paragraph. I believe that just because a terrible thing happens a lot doesn't mean we should just accept it. I will always speak up on matters to do with equal rights. Good luck to you to. :)

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