Finding Balance and Routine
The Climb
To be honest Im worn out, 3 teenagers with sass 18,17,16 like I mean sass x3, number 4 is 9, the blood pressure is peaking and the dishes, the vacumming, the bathrooms, the beds, the cooking, the food shopping, the laundry, the taxi service, my 3 other employments, finding the headspace for here is priority.
No mula right now but mula dont just fall into my lap,
I gotta work and earn that baby, so my question to all here, who are reading, how ?? lol the hell do I do this without losing my mind, I need my mind, its my biggest asset. I know im not alone we all have our Mt Everest's to climb, what im finding is that im here at all odd times, its like, I leave the best for last and end up having or very little time or concentration for WA. Let alone the friendships that can come of being at WA through being in routine.
Work it out
I think im working it out slowly, time for me should be the priority, but having dishes (washed and dirty to do), cleand and dirty laundry stacked like a broken laundrette, and the house being run by teenagers in and out with the expectation they come first, sometimes no foood in the house, I feel like swimming out into the ocean and never coming back, hoping i'll turn into a mermaid washed up on a desserted island and then what!! lol
Yes Im having a moment and now Im chuckling to myself thinking, girl, its not that bad. It could be alot worse, yeah i get it, but this is my path..... Just leave the dishes, laundry, housework, they can do it. Yes they can but will they? oh! hell no!! the payment is for help is sass, and Im dripping in it, the offloads are extremely exhausting and a complete mindplay of manipulation.
The 7 day Routine
Out comes my whiteboard, literally as i type, im looking at it, and its speaking to me 'write on me! and I'll show you guidance' :))
My schedule, the 7 day routine, and im starting to feel better still a little overwhelmed because I see my truth ahead of me. Its not that Im not looking forward to it, just a little routine help at home would be so appreciated, even a dinner one night would be awesome, I know being here at WA has been the best thing to find and Im not letting go, Ive let go of alot of good enterprises regrettably in the past, and have had to pick up the pieces while stumbling to find a sure footing so as to not stumble on the nex step, which yes, Ive stumbled again, omygosh! when will I stop stumbling?
When I put myself first
is one of the hardest things to do..... yeah I love me, but.... lol my children aww, now I gotta just stop, coz they love me but they doing what teenagers do, they are confused and peered pressured in society, social media and school, theres so much going on for them how could they possibly wanna help with chores and try to be independant looking like they have it together. I really need to take a leaf out of their unwritten laws, where they come first, so when I put myself first albeit very irractically I find Im alot happier, though, the offset is NOTHING gets done and teenagers are asking me where's dinner?, wheres my washing? why is the house so dirty? why is there no food in the house? I hate living here! why cant you be a normal mum like my other friends? That is my payback for not putting them first.
To me its pretty hurtful, but its my life journey to walk, so when I search for the silver lining, its there, its just covered in homelife grime, with a little wash and shine, i can see my reflection smiling back with a twinkle of hope, the teenage stage will be gone very soon and their independance will drive them to seek out new challenges independently, fully knowing Im a soft place for them, if or when they fall 24/7.
Slow like the Tortoise
My head is clearer, I have the whiteboard as my guiandance and the hard shell Ive grown, that is now my armour, Onwards and ever forward, take a rest and dont feel guilty bout resting, remember why Im here, and that is to heal and better myself, learn that the low hanging fruit can be just as juicy as the sunkissed fruit on top of the tree, alot harder to get to the top and im guessing the view from the top is breathetaking, knowing my pace is slow like the tortoise, the low hanging fruit is plentiful, take a breath to breathe in and exhale the good, the bad, and the bright future ahead.....the teenagers have just walked in, good time to put in to practise what Ive typed. Happy Days WAs much love :))
Recent Comments
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Thanks Tim, theres that added fact of trying to keep up, doesn't exist, its keeping my world on path
I am thinking the kids are old enough to help you with the house work, they can do their own laundry and help with the dishes. I know that children can be selfish and demanding, but they can assist you it will benefit them as much as you. Just my thought, wishing you success.
Yes you're right, they are and are very capable, just! Can they be bothered? Its an on going issue that im over and over and over, i needed to get out how my feeling was bullying my mindset today, thank you for you thoughts
wishing you much kindness and success
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You can do it just remember to take some me time
the most important gift, thank you :)