Success Requires Sacrifice, But at The Cost Of My Kids Respect?!
As simple as Affiliate Marketing is, it definitely not easy! At least for me anyway. Come to think of it, I haven't found too many things that have come real easy for me. No, I am not looking to have a pity party, or someone to tell me "It's OK". I was just thinking about the last 2years and the struggle I have had trying to build my dream into a reality.
I think it kind of hit me some kind of way today when I picked my son up from work and we were riding home. We were joking around like a father and son does and like these situations sometime do... it turned awkward.
I had asked him about his day and he gave the usual "It was Fine" and I sarcastically said something about him always being picked to work a Sunday and went on to say at least he was making money. He came back with a comment about "at least some of us are".
He followed it with a short chuckle and a "I'm just messing with you". I don't think he really meant anything mean, like I said, we always rib at each other and sometimes we get a little brutal. For some reason though, it kind of hit me in a weird way.
Back in May, my youngest daughter and her fiance' moved in to get back on their feet. It was actually a welcome addition at first. After a few weeks, Her boyfriend/fiancee had already quit 3 different jobs and seemed to have gotten very comfortable hanging around on the couch playing my son's PlayStation.
After about 3 and a half months and 3 more jobs later, he came to my son and asked him to urinate in a cup to pass a drug test for a job. My wife said it was the final straw and I had to tell my daughter that her boyfriend had to leave.
It turned very ugly, very quickly.
She let me know how I was never there for her, she had to rely on her granddad, I was a deadbeat, etc. etc. I couldn't believe it. Out of all the kids (I have 5 kids), she was always the one most supportive about going after your dreams. Growing up, I always thought we were pretty close, of course she grew up with her birth mother, but she would always come over for weekends and holidays.
Well back to today.
I tried to just shake off what my son said. We spent the rest of the day hanging out together, watching some t.v., snacking, and of course an hour on the PlayStation. I din't mention anything else about the comment to him.
When my wife was heading to bed, she asked me what was wrong. I explained to her that I think I have lost the respect of all the kids. She of course, denied it. She explained to me that when we made the decision for me to leave my job to pursue building a business, the kids understood what might or might not happen.
I listened, looked her in the eyes and told her what was said earlier between my son and I. Her demeanor changed slightly. I had told her before that I thought the kids didn't think too much of me anymore, and she always reconfirmed that they love me and supports the decision that we made. This time, I think maybe she seen what I seen.
When does sacrificing turn to losing the respect of your kids? Is this a price worth paying? I am struggling with whether I should keep moving forward just to show everybody or go back to a 9-5 and make the here and now easier.
I have found some small successes, but are they enough for me to endure the look from my kids? Or are this a feeling of my own? Maybe it's just a moment of doubt, my faith being tested. Maybe I am just in the valley of the ups and downs I was told would come.
Maybe this is that point where you are about to quit and then the door flies open and you start to soar!
Recent Comments
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It certainly isn't an easy business Jimbo but it can potentially be a good one , but it might be time to fine tune your site, ramp up your content and streamline your business. Maybe you need someone to check out just how well your site is performing. If you've given this 2 years the what's another 3 months of working flat out. You're fortunate to be able to be at home, I usually have to work approx. ten hours a day before I can even touch my online business. Go for it my friend. Jim
I am at a loss for words at the moment - that is sort of funny
in a way - a content writer at a loss for words - your blog
brings back memories of the past which I guess are clouding
what I was going to say sorry :)
I will have to agree with Vicki - are you working on the business
every day putting in your 8 hours or are you using other things
as an excuse of them getting in the way
Food for thought I think you should make a commitment for a
period of time and then reopen the topic to see where you stand
just a suggestion :)
Susan
That's what I think I'm going to do. I need to quit trying to focus on 10 different things and spent more time on my blog. Thank you for your comment...
A sad tale Jimbo and one that deserves a lot of thought.
Like you I have 5 kids and have had them at home at different times.
One thing to remember is that that you are the Father and not a mate. There is a big and important distinction.
I once told my daughter I would divorce her if she stayed with the deadbeat she was with. I was with a new wife at the time and it was causing all sorts of issues.
Now many years later to Married to another with three kids she will say "what was she thinking"
My point is they do come back when they see the light.
If WA is a full-time job, make it so, it is a brave move but it needs 8 hour days and even working on Sundays. Only then can you say you gave it everything.
Finally, it is the end result that you will live or die on. You just have to make it.
Take what you can, I am no expert on someone else's life I certainly have had my days.
Peter H
Thank you very much for your words. I have no doubt that my relationship with my daughter will heal in time. I usually let things slide off of my shoulder and just press forward. I agree that I need to put more work into building my blogs. I like to think of myself as a pretty self-disciplined person, but I do find myself getting lax in different areas of my daily work duties from time to time. I got caught up in a project around the house or someone messages me and I end up spending more time talking than working. It was a real wake up call for me.... and I think I really needed that whether it was intended or not. Again, thank you for your comments...
Hi Jimmie- always ask yourself-
Are you working hard on your business every day as if it was a job that has to be done?
Are you doing the training and completing each lesson?
Are you writing great content regularly?
Are you adding Value to your business every way you know how?
When you have given yourself the honest answers it requires, then you will know what changes you need to make
We can't change others but we can always change ourselves and maybe then the kids will walk closer and congratulate you on the awesome job you are doing.
Just a thought from the ol' gal in New Zealand
Vicki
Thank you for your reply. I will admit that I let things get in the way sometimes. While building a blog, I am also building a business as an artist also and sometimes they interfere with each other. My wife says that the kids so used to me working long hours at a job and we had raised them to do the same. The new path is new to them and they are not used to seeing me as a "House Husband" that blogs and paints LOL... Thank you for the questions! they are really some good points to think about!
Keep working hard on being creative and building your online business Jimmie and don't stop believing - the happier you are and the more you believe in you, the more the children will see and love this awesome Dad. Change is funny for kids and they will one day look at you and love you for everything you do = They already love you - they just don't understand :)
Been there with mine as well and it all comes right so keep being awesome
Vicki
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Never quit a job before earning wOrks...
Better one bird in your hand, than 10 in the sky