We All Have Our Demons, Don't We?

Oh boy! It has been too long since I have been on the WA platform.

The last post I published on my site was for Memorial Day! And the last work I did on my site was when I bought a ledger book to help me keep track of my links on each post.

Why have I been gone for so long?

Well, to put it in lament terms, it was summer. The kids wanted to be outside every day at 7 a.m., in the pool by 8 a.m., and from there my days were packed. By nightfall, I was too exhausted to put in the time.

I felt like, if I were to try to work, I would be ignoring them and the guilt got to be too much.

But was that a good enough reason for not doing what I set out to do, or "postponing" it?

I don't think so.

We all have our demons, and I most certainly have mine.

I have been trying to quit smoking for two months now. Went out and spent $140 on a supplement that, well, works when I take it, for the most part. But to cross the finish line, I actually have to STOP.

This in itself, is very hard for me since I have been a smoker for far too long.

But was that a good enough reason for not doing what I set out to do also?

I don't think so.

You know what I do think?

I think that I still let my fear get in the way of my success. Even though I tell myself I won't let that happen, it still does.

Fear. Stress. Exhaustion.

THESE are the reasons I have not done what I set out to do.

Don't get me wrong, this is NOT the end for me or my website, by any means.

Just another annoying bump in the road.

I think we all tend to let the demons in our lives over power our will, or our drive, to achieve the things we want most in life.

It is an easy out. But one without our desired outcome, of course. And that my friends, will get you no where. Just ask me!

I have also been dealing with a sort of "writers block."

Knowing that I need to write and post content, but not being able to pick myself up and do it. Drowning myself in my own self-doubt and worry about, well, I'm not even sure. Everything!

That, I think, is where my fear comes in. It comes and takes over my mind and body, freezing me in time, and making up excuses as to why I can't do this, or can't do that. It keeps me from doing what I know in my heart, I love to do, when I am doing it.

So if I were to break it down....

I am afraid of success. I am afraid of learning how to be a non-smoker (especially when it is my vice!). I am afraid of taking time away from the kids to do what I need to do, and still give them the time they need.

On the other hand, so much positive has happened also.

My son started preschool a few weeks back, and I had a birthday.

I tried to avoid my birthday by any cost, but my family and friends would not let me.

When I think about the last year of my life, I see so many positive things.

I have a website that I never had before. A platform that is completely and utterly awesome in helping me achieve this website. A family here at WA that is able and willing to help at any time with anything I may need.

Even though I have not posted on my site in months, I still have views and have gotten 6 new likes just this past week on my websites facebook account.

This means that people are still looking for the information I have to offer and the door for my success is still WIDE OPEN!!

I have improved my credit score over 100 points since January, and my financial status has improved ten fold since this time last year.

My son is doing great in preschool and absolutely loves it!!

Aside from my own personal demons, my life has been great and there are things that need to be celebrated!

Wow! I needed to get all of that off my chest! Thank you for taking the time to read my blog.

I think this is exactly what I needed to do, to get my mojo back!

Just write.

Write what you are feeling, no matter how bad or guilty you feel.

Write to get the weight of whatever may be holding you back, off your chest and off your shoulders.

Write to let others know, they are not alone in this journey.

Write so that others may let YOU know, you are not alone in this journey.

We all have our demons which hold us back. Pushing them aside is the hard part. Reaching out for help, is even harder.

Starting over again, is the hardest.

I know though, that with the blessing of this WA family, and all the opportunity which is to be had here, I can still do this, I never, couldn't do this.

Thanks for reading and you for sure, have not seen the last of me, or my website.

Stay Awesome my WAmily!!!!

Feel free to leave some comments and share if you deal with the same demons!!! We are all here to help each other, even if we ghost for a bit. (this may help me more than you right now lol, I need some motivation!!!)

Peace Love and Coffee

Angela : )