Desire and Beliefs Pt2: A Step Toward Happiness

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One of the things I've come to understand over the past year about the Law of Attraction is that the purpose of practicing it is to achieve happiness....not necessarily to get the 'stuff'. In fact, I have paranoid moments when I think it only has to do with getting happy and nothing to do with getting the stuff. But according to those in the know, once you are happy, the stuff comes because the vibration of happiness is the vibration of abundance.

Do It for the Happiness: Not the Stuff

The catch 22 of the whole thing is if you do the Law of Attraction in order to get the stuff, you won't get it. But not just that. I've come to realize even if you try to get happy in order to get the stuff it won't come. The key is to get happy just because you can't stand to feel bad.

So the first issue to consider when working with beliefs and desires is to get around the reason why you want to do it. Is it because you need the stuff? Or is it because you need to feel better. The question is foundational. If you can't answer 'to be happy'....that is with a heartfelt feeling of wanting to feel better, the stuff probably won't come and you won't feel better either.

The way to want to feel happy more is to develop a sensitivity to your feelings and just what you are willing to tolerate. So as feelings go, your honest feelings are everything in this work. If you feel like you can tolerate bad feelings and unhappiness or you don't even notice it when its happening (its like this for a lot of people) then you have to get sensitive to how you feel.

Virtual Reality: Visualize To Get Sensitive

There are a number of ways you can get sensitive but my favorite has been to practice something called the Virtual Reality Process as outlined in a book called Ask and It Is Given. While many people assume this exercise is about 'visualizing' what you want (and it is), it is much more about developing a sensitivity to how you feel and "to prove to yourself that you can change how you feel by what you think about"

This is a deceptively difficult exercise because there is a very strict criteria for how the 'visualization' should go and accordingly how it should feel. It took Esther Hicks (author of Ask and It Is Given) some 500 tries until she got it right the first time. And yet it took years for me to even try the exercise because it seemed so obvious and simple. My advice is not to waste time and get into it even if you think you get the idea of it and so don't feel the need to do it. Again the object of the exercise is not necessarily to manifest what you want but to get a sense of what feels "good".

Get Sensitive To How You Feel

The exercise is typically short because most of us cannot hold a truly positive thought for very long. Start with a place you know you would feel happy. It is important to take note of specific physical comforts like the temperature, time of year, and time of day.

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The most critical and tricky of these elements is to visualize the perfection of every aspect.

If you find you need to fix something in the visualization, the exercise is over and you should to stop and restart. For example, if there is someone you would like to have in this place with you but you want them to be slightly different and start to adjust specifics of what they say and do then the visualization is going wrong. This can be true of things as well. One example I heard of was of a woman who imagined being in her garden, but as she looked at it, in summer, there were some things that had already bloomed and were dead on the vine and needed to be cleaned up. The weeds were coming up too and so the visualization needed to be stopped right there.

In short, the way I try to remember it, is that a Virtual Reality is not meant to be a planning session for a future event but a conceptual space outside of time and even practical realities. This is something that a lot of people get confused about and is what separates Virtual Reality from most visualizations we've ever heard of before. So if you find yourself in your dream house but end up calling the repairmen to fix the roof, then stop and start it over again. you are not doing it right.

Visualize To Get Happy

The key to this exercise is to get a real sense of what perfection feels like to a very high level. Most of us have gotten used to an imperfect world. Its natural to the point where we have gotten impervious to things that don't feel good. In fact, many of us 'tough guys' like to take pride in how much crap we can tolerate or not even notice and still function. The purpose of this exercise is completely the opposite. The purpose is to acclimatize ourselves to what really feels good to us and that is a very individual thing.

If you find that you are judging your visualization based on what you think someone else might think of it, then you are again doing it wrong. It has to feel good to YOU and only YOU.

Once you so this exercise right you will get a very distinct idea of what it is that feel good to you and accordingly a better sense of "What you really want". But mostly you will have develop a lower tolerance for what feels bad and have at least a compass point and standard for what you will be shooting for in later attempts to alter your beliefs. Beliefs feel good.

As soon as you get a perfect picture of the time and place you would feel comfortable and happy, again stop the visualization since the odds are you will start to try to 'fix things' if you stay in the visualization too long. Stay as long as you feel good then get out.

The Most Important Thing

The most important thing you are going to have to know before working with desire and belief and agree with at a very deep level, is:

  • it's more important to feel good about finances than to feel worried about them. AND it's more important to feel good about finances than to figure out how to fix them!
  • It's more important to feel good about your relationship than to feel bad about getting it. AND it's even more important to feel good about relationships than to figure out how to get the relationship you want!
  • It's more important to feel good about the thing....anything....than to fix the thing.
  • Feeling good needs to come first

I know this is a hard one to really get and I have problems with it myself. Even when you can get a real visceral sense of it from practicing a Virtual Reality, keeping that sense of the importance of feeling good is easier said than done. That is what makes Virtual Reality so important, because without an actual experience of and sensitivity to your feelings your tolerance level and even a 'need' to feel bad will over ride any desire to feel good.

You may feel that you 'need' to feel bad to fix a situation, but the bottom line message of The Law of Attraction is the complete opposite. Feel good THEN fix it. Feel good THEN get it. Feel good then take inspiration. Feel good then Act. If you can't do any of these things then just feel good. Feeling good is THE most important thing according to this system of thought and it runs 100% AGAINST everything we were taught growing up about how we should feel.

A lot of people tend to get fixated on a false dichotomy of Law of Attraction VS action. They assume that some say Law of Attraction requires no action and then pound the merits of action. Which when you feel deeply about it, might feel negative. It really is a personal thing. If you feel guilty about not taking action then of course you won't feel good unless you take action. THE KEY is not about taking action or not taking action. The Key is about feeling good no matter what because happiness is the whole point. Remember? Law of Attraction is about feeling good, not about action or inaction.

The next question is how can you feel good without having the condition or the thing? You have to change what you believe about it and that was covered in my last article. I will cover more specifically about some ways I've found to do that in the next post if I have time with all this Super Affiliate stuff going on. But for now and if you like visualizing, give Virtual Reality a try for the purpose of feeling good and developing a sensitivity to what does feel good instead of the stuff. At least you'll feel good:)

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Recent Comments

3

Hi, Gordon.

This is thought-provoking stuff. I will have to measure this with my belief system and then maybe comment on this.
Thank you for giving me something to ponder on.
Hennie

The only way to decide on it is to try it. The exercise differs from more common types of visualization in that it is designed to:
1) show yourself that you can feel better
2) Define what good feelings actually feel like as defined by Law of Attraction
3) Develop sensitivity to how you feel and therefore help give you a more accurate bead on what you want
No one can 'tell' you or explain it to you and experiencing it first then noticing how you feel and what goes on around you for a while...then thinking about it is what would suggest. I know what you mean about thinking about it though. I thought about it for years before trying it and I regret that lol. I hope it works for you!!

Thanks Gordon. Will try it.

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