Could Have Would Have Should Have

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Growing up there was one thing my father said that always stuck with me. It was "You coulda, woulda, shoulda but you didn't". This was his reply every time I said I would do something and didn't do it. If I said that I should do something he would always say "should just means your not going to". And would remind me to be mindful of the coulda woulda, shouldas. Whenever I said I could do something he would always say "Of course you can do it, but the real question is will you? Most people want to do this or would like to do that but it doesn't necessarily mean that they will." or the fact that I could do something.

What you would do and what you could do are two different things. How often do you say "I want to watch this show or that show" and you never get around to actually watching it, but you can easily re watch an old episode of friends, seinfeld or grey's anatomy that you have seen so much, not only do you know it by heart and what's going to happen in the episode, so do those around you. But we somehow look at our children and say we don't understand how they can watch the same thing over and over again. This is why our children look at us like we don't make any sense sometimes. We like to say do what I say and not what I do but most kids do what they see moreso than what they are told.

Don't worry about the what would have, what could have or what should have happened in any given situation. Focus on how you will do it and how you will do it differently.

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Recent Comments

8

Thanks for these words Jumaane.

you're welcome

Great advice! Your father was a good teacher.
Sheila

Thank you I will make sure to tell him that.

Good advice, Jumaane. Thanks for sharing!

Thank you and you're welcome

Words of wisdom.

Thanks

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