The Difference between Helping Others and Doing the work for them
As a fellow member of the Wealthy Affiliate Community I always seem to be questioning myself about this topic. It is evident that receiving help from others is definitely one of the great aspects about WA, but what happens when you get so much help from a specific person that you are personally taking time out of their schedule, and even obstructing them from focusing on their selves and moving forward? How far would you be willing to go when it comes to receiving help from others?
As you can see, this is definitely a touchy topic. You definitely want to avoid irritating or causing any sort of tension among any members within the community because in all honesty, WA is a place that avoids any sort of confrontational behavior, so you do not want to cause any trouble by drawing the line when it comes down to asking a particular person for help. In my opinion, there are certain degrees to asking others for help, and you definitely don’t want to go past that particular imperceptible line. Here are my top 5 No No’s when it comes to asking someone for their aid:
No No’s
1. Never ask for someone to do all the work for you, especially if you know that he/she is a very busy person. While some members may help you out to a certain extent, they are never going to do things that involve doing all the work for you. They may point you towards the right direction or even show you how to do some things, but they will never do things like add content to your site, or anything that involves your own effort and not theirs. If you are someone who is just lazy sometimes, I suggest that you hire someone who will do the work for you for pay.
2. Don’t Manipulate People. Just don’t do it, it’s not okay. This is definitely a characteristic that you do not want to possess yourself, it is just not going to help you out in the long run. I really don’t have to explain what being manipulative is, because I sure enough know that a lot of people know what manipulative qualities are, but just to be clearer, this is the definition that I found for “Manipulative” on dictionary.com -“influencing or attempting to influence the behavior or emotions of others for one’s own purposes.” I’m pretty sure this is clear enough. Even the most clueless person out there can tell when they are being manipulated, so please do not do this with other members, because you are only ruining both their experience and the communities experience here at WA as well. Remember we want to keep a positive atmosphere.
3. If you do get help from someone personally, try to avoid doing things like sharing personal information or asking for favors when you don’t even know the person very well, or know that the person would get offended by this type of question. Honestly I suggest not sharing personal information at all, but for some instances it may be necessary, just not here at WA!
4. If you have received help from someone and wish to share some of their insights or works always be sure to check with the person who helped you so that you do not make it seem like you are infringing on their copyright guidelines, and to avoid possibly offending someone.
5. Do not EVER disrespect someone who is offering you help, even if it’s outside WA, this is just not all right and is more than frowned upon in many places. Be sure to express your gratitude, you don’t want to make it seem like the help you are getting is being taken for granted. Everyone always appreciates a warm welcome and acknowledgment.
Now, please note that I’m not asserting that one shouldn't ask for help whenever they are stuck, I’m just saying that maybe sometimes you should research things yourself beforehand, just to assure yourself that you are not getting what you are looking for so that you could then ask others for help.
So guys always be sure to be thankful and to not take advantage of others who are taking time out of their day to help you with your particular situation. Even though it is kind of an aspect of WA, that still doesn't give you the right to manipulate it to your advantage. Receiving help from others is one of the biggest blessings that exists within mankind, so don’t take it for granted, because even though it may seem like it is granted sometimes, it really isn't.
We are all human beings, and we can only try our best. And if I may add, sometimes returning the favor for someone who helps you out, really helps you out a lot in the long run, even if the person doesn't need the favor at the moment, it is always great to offer and is a great sign of acknowledgment. Hope I wasn't too hard on anyone, I just get frustrated when I see that people aren't playing nice. Please don't beat yourself up too much about it if you find yourself doing some of the things I listed because, like I said before, we are all only human beings. Wish you all the best, and I really do hope you become successful members here at WA, because that is ultimately the goal. Would love to hear some of your thoughts or feelings on this, or any of your personal No No’s. Please leave them in the comment section below.
Recent Comments
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If your stuck ask for help, if you get the help, learn from it, when you have the experience pay back the help to others. Do not misuse the help, it is usually freely given. At WA we all want to help others, that's where we mostly got our experience. The only time it is a silly question is when you ask it twice!
To your success!
Bernie
Hey Bernie, I agree, you shouldn't misuse the help that you are given :D But, before asking for aid, be sure to really research what you are looking for first, so that you are actually learning as a member, and if you still can't find the answer then give us a holler :D Thanks for being a part of community btw :)
I liked your post, it is needed. I am one that doesn't ask a lot of questions, but do from time to time. We are encouraged to ask from the start here. I try to find the answer on my own first though now that I know how to do it. And of course there is always Google. :)
It can be a touchy subject for sure, and I'm pleased you've brought it up. I'm just knew here and haven't really noticed a lot of this kind of thing going on - just very impressed with the community spirit. I think we could get ourselves a little too tied up with number 4 though. I've passed on some tips I've learned from other members myself in a spirit of 'pay it forward' - never content, of course, or personal information - and I've named the people I've received the help from. It would take me days to answer a question, however, if I had to ask each person who's pointed me in the right direction for permission to pass the info on. Just a thought.
If only I could edit the spelling. :) 'knew' should be 'new'. In my defense, I just woke up...a second coffee is in order.
Very Funny Jen, you could just copy and paste the details and delete the comment and post the edited version in the comments :D
I've had the second coffee now...and my brain is almost firing. Thanks for the comments tip. :)
You got a point there. For me, the problem is always opposite - I don't ask questions. Whenever getting stuck, I would just review the training course or simply google it.
That is definitely a great methodology, it really sounds like you are one to go out and make sure that you can have your own back first :) I'm sure you know when to call for help :D
Yep. I do see enough that some members ask very basic questions that are covered in training. Great post as a reminder:)
Thank you so much for taking the time to post this. It is dead on. I too asked many questions and sought out help early on (not as much now, but I still do get stuck at time).
The way I look at it is, if I have done all the research I can do and am exhausted by the research then I will ask for direction to point me where I need to look and/or just outright help.
Thanks Susie :) I think that you take the right measures before deciding that you need to seek guidance. I'm sure a lot of people do, your comment was much appreciated. :D
I know I would never ask anyone to do something for me unless they are getting reinbursed properly for their services and I agree It's not cool for someone to ask you to do something completely for them for free. That would be rude now wouldn't it? :) Good topic to bring up
Thanks :D I see it quite often here at WA, just kind of wanted to raise some awareness and tips.
No, the problem isn't asking questions, the problem is exploiting other members :D Don't stress too much about it, you are definitely free to ask as many questions as you want :)
part of the problem I am seeing is people are not even going through the training and/or the search provided here at WA.
If you are giving it an honest try and getting stuck, many of us who are willing to help have been direct and/or helped in many ways ourselves.
Some people are rather lazy, but of course not everyone is like this. I really do hope that this changes pretty soon, it is becoming a bit redundant.
We're actually encouraged to ask lots of questions. I think it is even stated early in the training that there is no such thing as asking too many questions. The problem arises sometimes when people don't give it a shot themselves, go back through the training, type questions into the search bar and go through the links that appear etc before piping up.
Exactly. You just hit the bulls eye with this statement :) This is kind of what I was referring to as well when I said that some people can be lazy because they don't give it a shot themselves :D I loved your comment :)
That helps ease my mind. I try to make it plain I am trying to learn to do things on my own. It is challenging for me, but I have made lots of progress. What seems like baby steps to most people is a big accomplishment for me.
I do thank everyone who has helped me,or encouraged me.
Best wishes to all!
You have to remember Melanie, that we all have different strengths and weaknesses.
Now if someone has paid a subscription and for the life of them they cannot figure something out and even the "Search" is not very helpful, you can judge this by the size of the Q&A's.
I very rarely ask anyone for anything, but since joining WA I have been encouraged by the owners to do, so I did.
The only person who answered my question straight away was "floridajf".
I have gone back to doing for myself because no one will do it for you and they are too busy doing it for themselves.
Sometimes I think people are Hypocritical, which I am sure comes into your study of Abuse (taking for granted).
Just my two pennies worth.
MelvinS
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Good guidelines in here. For me this is common sense but I'm sure it's not so for every one. Thank you for your work :-)
Your very welcome indeed :)