Funky Monkey Heart Attack

Anybody Stressed Out From Workin' Hard Day After Day?

Ready To Cut Loose and Have Some Fun?

Come On, Everybody...Do the Funky Monkey!

(NOTE: No Monkeys or Chimps Were Harmed in the Making of This Blog. Although I Did Select Some Monkeys Wearing Clothing, I Purposely Rejected Photos of Monkeys With Cigars, Cigarettes, and Weapons. Animal Rights Friends: My Heart is With You.)

FUNKY MONKEY HEART ATTACK

Play it on the Radio in My Car,

I'm Addicted to That Bass Guitar,

I Hear That Backbeat and I Gotta Move,

Out On the Dance Floor, I'm In the Groove,

I'm a Funk Junkie, Got a Monkey On My Back,

("Yeah, Ross Perot Knew My Mom...Hey! Whatta Ya Sayin' ??")

Funk Junkie, and That's a Fact, Jack,

("Yeah, I Ate the Banana...And it Was GOOD!")

It's a Funk Junkie, Funky Monkey Heart Attack.

("I'm Zelda, and Right Now, I'm Finding You Irresistible!")

Got a Jones For Jazz,

I'm a Buff For the Blues,

That Boogie-Woogie Rhythm

Just Turns Me Loose,

I'm a Funk Junkie, Got a Monkey On My Back,

("Gene Simmons Goes Down and I'm a Shoe-In For the New Kiss Front Man!")

Funk Junkie, and That's a Fact, Jack,

("Young Man, You Quiet Down Right This Minute, or Get the Hell Out of My Library!")

It's a Funk Junkie, Funky Monkey Heart Attack.

("I'm Just Hangin' Around, in My Farmer Browns!")

Plug Me In, Electrify My Soul,

I'm a Rockin' Freak, and I'm On a Roll,

Slap That Bass, I Need a Funky Fix,

Get Krunk, Get Funk, That's How I Get My Kicks,

I'm a Funk Junkie, Got a Monkey On My Back,

("Nanny Nanny Boo Boo, I Got a Nana Ba Ba.")

Funk Junkie, and That's a Fact, Jack,

("OK, Guys...We Get Through One More Audition, and We're in the Blue Man Group!")

It's a Funk Junkie, Funky Monkey Heart Attack.

("Angelina Jolie: Eat Your Heart Out!")

I'm a Funk Junkie, Got a Monkey On My Back,

("Hey, Baby...Would You Spend the Night With a Total Stranger, if You Knew National Security Was At Stake?")

Funk Junkie, and That's a Fact, Jack,

("This is DJ Funky Monkey Spinnin' Out All Your Favorite Golden Oldies...")

It's a Funk Junkie, Funky Monkey Heart Attack.

("You Did WHAT With My Beer Can Collection?")

Funk Junkie, Funky Monkey Heart Attack,

("God Bless Mommy, and Daddy, and Uncle Steve, and Aunt Vera, and Grammy Therese...")

Funk Junkie, Funky Monkey Heart Attack,

("So, I Sez, 'Ziggy, Mon, If Dey Got Da Dreds, Dey Ain't Da Feds' ")

Funk Junkie, Funky Monkey Heart Attack.

("Are You My Mommy?")

("Sweet Adeline...Sweet A-de-line!")

("Static Electricity? What's Static Electricity??")

---

("Cosmic Radio, Cosmic Schmadio!")