Hello, my name is Arleen Wright and on 2012, feeling so sick with a strange disease, unknown to any of our family or relatives… Loosing the job, career, health and everything along with the ability to move, eat and think. I was devastated, furious and broken heart when they place me on disability at that moment the world had ended for me. Consequently, cannot longer legally work any more...!
In reality, even if I could work, I would not be very effective or even helpful with this form of lupus, known as Scliroderma :(...! After 3 years of depression, finding no effective treatment in order to get rid of the non-stop excruciating pain I was experiencing... not really knowing what was wrong with me at the time, I decided that even if I couldn't physically move. Convenience myself that I could still be useful some way, some how. Regardless, of how worthless the situation made me feel at the time.
After crying, kicking and screaming for days on end, eventually acceptance set in, the faith that was dealt to me, wan not the end of the world... as my inner voice was loudly screaming at the top of its abilities YES IT IS THE END.
Attempting to cover this annoying loud voice with a smile, prompting me to embraced my faith and soon after be at peace with my destiny. Committing to not feel sorry because i was not a victim, but rather do something about it…! I started therapy, hoping that they will release me and allow me to go to the gymnasium instead with Hubby's help I could fallow the same machine exercises. I started attending the SENIOR classes, stretching and pushing myself in hopes that my body would still have some type of movement, rather than none at all. Facing the daily deterioration of my motor skills from bad to worst in such a short time, just like a full dependable baby at the mercy of my family...!
On April of 2016, is going to be 2 years since I committed to changing my life, today I am stronger, not depress and my stamina surprises me at times. Still a struggle to stay awake since the medication totally drains my energy but I am coping... Slowly but surely, I am able to smile again, having find something that I can do from home has not been easy at all lol, especially when one can not move, think or stay awake lol ;)…!
At the moment, I finally found the medication that has taken the horrible daily pain away, but its so strong I have to fight my sleep otherwise I be sleeping 24 hrs... My mind is just starting to clear up, the fog is now lifting, being able to read and actually comprehend what I am actually reading, as my brain is processing the information, is been a huge relieve lol. Able to do some writing now, again is been a daily uphill battle focusing on something that interest me could be the answer to focus on my developing success rather than the pain and all that I cannot do ;)...!!!
I feel I was led here as a reward for all that I recently lost, providing me with hope showing me that I can still be good for something even when my body fails to be flexible and immobile. While, the mind deteriorates, slowly regressing and becoming forgetful most of the time...! Yet, I truly believe very deep, deep inside that if I apply and push myself I can re-learn it all and get myself back to some type of normal lol… Because I believe that yes, I can make a difference, regardless of my current situation ;)...!
I remember there was a day when I laid in bed looking like the walking dead as my skin was literary peeling off my face and body, as I wasted away going from 160 to 100 pounds, I AM HERE TODAY WRITING WITH TONS OF MISTAKES BUT I AM MAKING FULL SENTENCES NOW ;)…!