When you realize that you're not the mind anymore

I've spent a lifetime under the delusion that I am nothing more than my mind and the automatic programming that governs my actions.

For a time, my habits served me well, but as the world around me began to crumble, I found myself trapped in a state of disillusionment.

My business, the very thing I had built from the ground up, came to a halt with the onset of this cursed pandemic. I had always been seen as a leader, a warrior, a jester, a loving husband and father, but now even my flaws were laid bare for all to see.

My health and the health of those around me was in shambles, yet I still clung to the illusion that all was well.

As the reality of my situation dawned on me, I found myself alone in a way I had never experienced before.

This newfound loneliness allowed me to see myself honestly and deeply, and I began to question the path my life had taken. I desired change, but found that my environment and the people around me were too ingrained in my habits to allow for any real transformation.

Should I change my environment? Should I set out to discover what I am truly capable of? These were questions that plagued me.

It was in this state of contemplation that I came to realize that everything I needed was already within me.

God had created me with all the necessary components for a fulfilling life, yet I had been blind to them, lost in the illusions of my own mind. Even my wife, who had always been a source of love and support, found herself unable to reach me as I spiraled into a state of petulance and sullenness.

But as I began to take responsibility for my own life, I discovered that I had the power to shape my own destiny. I may not be able to change the past, but it is within my power to choose how I feel and react to it. It is a muscle that must be exercised daily, for the road to true freedom is a constant struggle.

But it is a struggle worth undertaking, for the reward is a life truly lived."