Starting To Feel The Possibilities

I have always struggled in life trying to fit in places I have never been able to fit. I have struggled with social anxiety most of my life, although it was too many years after high school before that was a term I had heard of. I didn’t go to college partly because I would have to be around people and do presentations and group work. I get that it sounds stupid. How can you not get a higher education because of that you ask? I can’t really give you an answer.

A permanent, mild depression basically settled over my life as I could only find work in minimum wage customer service positions that have never paid enough to live. I found myself alone all the time and hating everything. Myself, my job, my inability to socialize and the sheer number of people that are everywhere all the time.

I have bounced from job to job and the hatred and depression and panic attacks got to a really bad point. The constant meaningless interactions with customers (of course this is just me and lots of people seem to enjoy their customer service jobs) has taken its toll over the years and have left nothing for real interactions with people.

Discovering Wealthy Affiliate

Since I just can’t go to college now and I don’t have the funds to do online schooling for jobs I likely wouldn’t even be able to interview for, I had been looking for a way to earn a living online where I could do my work by myself and have the mental energy available to socialize in a non work environment.

Everything always seemed too good to be true and promised easy money with minimal effort. It was ridiculous.

I signed up for wealthy affiliate because it said it would teach me how to build a business and that there would be others to help along the way. Unfortunately, for me, I had a really hard time believing that it was doable for me. I was still too focused on desperately needing out of my job, that I kept trying to determine how much money could I reasonably make in the shortest amount of time. What if I spent all this time writing articles and I fail? So many things talk about failing and that you have to fail that failure although seemed more likely.

After six months of not doing enough, I was finally able to summon enough strength and mental energy to make the decision to give it everything I had because if I don’t I will always be trapped.

First Breakthrough

I have done more in a month and a half then I did in the first six months. There is so much to learn and do that I’m trying not to be overwhelmed by everything I have to do. Going to my rent job which takes away from my business is irritating. LolI have a functioning website set up with about 15 articles and more on the way. Having trouble a bit with the social media aspect, but I am trying to move through it. At least it’s not in person. I actually am proud of myself for what I have done so far and I’m sorry to say I don’t think I have ever felt that.

Next Steps

I have let go of the concept(mostly) of trying to determine how much money I can earn and when. I am just going to focus on completing the training and creating more and more content and believe the money will follow when it’s ready. Although I do hope to earn enough in the next six months for the site to pay for itself. I hope that I am aiming too low.

I am excited to see where I will be in the next six months and hopefully I will be that much closer to a better life.