A Day at the Unemployment Office
Delaware renounced it's "Lower, Slower" status on Tuesday (on-the-dole payday) when it sent me express notice that I might be eligible for another 14 weeks of Unemployment Benefits (at $141/week since government legislation took away $25/week), and to come on down to the UI office to check it out. Naturally, I'm in. I drive to Georgetown, hit the UI office, sign in, and take a number. This is not an uplifting place. Scores of folks wait with an air of despair, anger, or just plain weariness in this bleak, uncomfortable place. They employ a security guard to make sure no one tries to steal your number, or stand up, or....who knows? You can attempt an escape, or be trapped. Pick one.
Five hours later my name is called at which time I am handed voluminous paper work to fill out....for the second time. Two hours later, my number is called. (I'm Number 93. When I came in, they were working with Number 24. I know this because there is a red, electric sign that shows the current Number. What they fail to mention is that there is also an "alpha" that goes with the "numeric," like Bingo, so the number that was up when I came in was “really” F24. I am G93. And I thought I'd gotten lucky when I first got there. Uh huh....)
One-hundred and sixty-nine numbers later, I get up to speak to an agent, a young woman with apparent ownership of some smarts. Before she takes my paperwork, she brings Me (AKA G93) up on her computer. By now I'm stifling snores, and shifting stiff joints. She stares at the computer for quite some time. I'm now beginning to wonder if I still exist, or whether my new name is Dorothy thanks to a clandestine arrangement between Delaware and Kansas, and I'm about to ask if anyone has a map and some Aspercreme. (Think a room full of plastic chairs, and our very puffed-up security guard who says that you can't stand in the room, but you can stand in the hall where, if you elect to stand, you will miss your name when they call it.) Now I'm wondering if Aspercreme has a half-life, and what it is in the unlikely event that it does.
M. S. Agent finally tells me, without preamble, "You should have been paid by Maryland Unemployment." I say my line, then she tells me that they, the State of Maryland Unemployment Folks, should have kicked in on August 9, 2010 with unemployment benefits, that my payments should have been over twice what I started with from Delaware, and that Maryland owes me back payments from, well, August 9, 2010 and amounting to whatever a lump sum of over twice what I was getting from Delaware amounts to starting around 4 months ago -- a small fortune in my world. I say my next line, and she writes down a phone number. I'm told to call Persons Unknown in the Maryland System on Monday to straighten out this mishegoss.. I ask her name (Jackie), thank her for her due diligence, and limp out of the room to Walmart and, ultimately, Walgreens, where I really have no money to spend, but hope springs eternal.
On the way to my car from the UI office, and only four people left in it, I thank The Universe with my best George Burns impersonation. (I'm beat. It's the best I can do.) When an office with four agents in it can suck the very life out of you, you know they have Power. Nonetheless, I am numbly grateful because I understand that I have been given what is possibly the most brilliant gift it's possible to receive. Time. The Universe is Good. And I know this for another few reasons. I never thought to buy Aspercreme, but don't believe it works, anyway. I'm getting funds....dollars....dineros, the amount of which will easily fill my modest needs. And I woke up prematurely at 6:30 this morning, and actually got out of bed. See how that works?
Of course, due to the failing mental capacity of government employees who, in the face of incomprehensible revised unemployment legislation, suffered serious loss of brain cells, this is only the beginning of the story. I can hear The Universe laughing as I type............
Recent Comments
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Poor you. Sounds absolutely horrendous. Difficult to maintain your sanity. It doesn't seem to matter which country you live in government organisations have a knack for making it as difficult as possible for people wanting to use their services.
Hi, BIS. Thanks for reading my most recent....thing. Actually, ti was meant to be humorous. Guess that didn't come through. I wrote that well over a year ago. Since then, my unemployment was cut off prematurely by 44 weeks. Now, I can write another blog titled "Woe is Me." ;) So much government. So little time........My only question is: What sanity? ;) Thanks again. You're the best!
I hope you get back pay that sounds like quite a nice chunk of change. I actually got back pay from the military before and it was nice, I wasn't counting on it so I just stashed it away for a rainy day.
Hi, and nice to meet you. As I told BIS, that whole thing was meant to be funny, but I guess something got lost in the translation. No back pay for me, and no more unemployment benefits. Happily, I saved up, and I'm sure there are people who need it more than I do. Thanks for reading! Hope to see you as we work through The Process. Best 'O Luck!
This is quite a tale of horror... hopefully you come out of this with some additional bank. Three things I hate... Unemployment offices, DMV offices and PGE... not necessarily in that order. I wish for things to get better for you and keep your chin up.
Hiya, and thanks for taking time to read my little story. As I keep saying, most of that was meant to be humorous. Guess I need to "fix" my writing style, which tends to be dry and on the 'grave yard" side. I'm with you. Not sure what PGE is, but the DMV and the Unemployment office are the absolute pits. Happily, or not, I won't be visiting the Unemployment office...like, ever again. Thanks again for reading, and thanks so much for your kind good wishes. Best of luck to you and your own "bank." ';)
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Your a very good writer you should go far here. You effeminately do write things other people are willing to read. I wish you well just stay with the system use the training and the day will soon come when you will kiss that unemployment office good bye.