Fear of Rejection and How I Over Came it.
Many people across the world grow up fearing what others would think of them. I know i was one of them. Until a change occured. I was at work one day when I was at least 21 or 22 yrs old. Still coming out of my shell learning what it was to be a work A holic. Surrounding myself with the statement "I Don't Have Time". But my GM made a remark at work that did not sit well with me. She said "When you are at work you represent mcdonalds and when you are outside of work you represent mcdonalds." As if mcdonalds and the people whom I work with I could not deplore the most.
I looked at her and said to myself ohh no I do not! When I am at work I rep mcdonalds but when I am outside of work, at home, at the movies, or where ever I rep ME!!! I do me. I give no one the Authority to defiine me! Nor who I am! Or what I can be! Unless you God and even with God He gives us the power of "Free Will". Still able to define ourselves. Now you can give me your opinions and I can choose to either accept them, put them in my "Think on this later bin" in the back of my mind or totally reject them.
Either way I will not let you define me. I AM NO ONE SLAVE! I may work in a industry that treats their workers like slaves and pay us crappy pay for long and ardurous hours. But by no means does this makes me your slave. I do not need you to live. I got a brain. I got my own smarts. I can think for myself. I am "Autonomous"
- Definition: Government: Self-governing; independent; subject to its owns laws only. b. pertaining to an autonomy, or self-governing community.
- Biology: "Existing and functioning as an independent organism. Ohh! Dont you just adore dictionary.com? I know I do. lol
So, when my boss lady said that. I decided to protest that statment by wearing my regular clothes to work and changing into my uni-form (One Form). To let her and all of mcdonalds know "You Do Not Own Me." So, getting back to my point. One day the managers had a meeting at a table that set right next to the exit door and the womens restroom was located right next to that table. Im like to myself ughh! I dont want them to see me. What will they think of me! took me all of 20 minutes to gather up the courage to leave the restroom but when I did. Of coarse they were all stund at how beautful I was outside my workforce attire. Of coarse the boss lady came off a bit "Offended".
It was from that day on I decided not to care what others thought of me and the fear of rejection slowly started to leave along with many other fears. Now everyone is different when it comes to being shy or being an introvert. There are many different clinical diagnosises for this. Some of it comes from being alone, others come from being bullied as a child and all of this starts when one is a child. Because that is when a person is most vulnerable. These things does damage to a child psyche. As we start to grow older we often retain what we hear, saw and what was done to us as children into our adult lives.
Not all introverts have a bad upbringing some of us are like that just because we choose to be...We love the company of Me, myself, and I. Not to sound narcissistic but that just how we are. Im one of them. I value my privacy ferocioulsy and my time is precious. However, fast forward 5-6 years later I now am still myself. But aged as fine wine.
- I value my privacy but...I have come to like hanging out with friends.
- I have come to adore being somewhat social as long as it is on a topic I am interested in and not invassive.
- I have come to like having the company of a boyfriend. Eh guess some companionship is good. A little R&R or what I like to call it L&B. Won't hurt to bad. But thats a different subject. lol
I said all of this to make a point. It takes an introvert being placed inside of an extrovert realm at will to over come the fear of rejection. Hey, everyone is different but that is what it took for me. I was never a socialble person. Always quiet still am in some ways. But now i can't seem to shut up lol. I must speak. lol
- I like conversing.
- Not too much of an out going person but when i do...I like going out in every since of the word such as mountain climbing,
- I have an interest for sky diving and yet I am terrified of heights! Eeek!
- I like traveling to different places I guess you can say that I am a bit nomadic.
Just to name a few of my new likes now at the ripe old age of 26 turning 27 in January. Now with introverts the only way you will get us to come out and play is if you place in front of us something that brings about curiostiy. Not giving no one any keys to figure me out. Ive been burn enough to know not to take all bait. To finish, you have to make us wonder and not feel like we are hopeless, Give us a blank canvas, some colored markers or maybe just a number 2 pencil and watch us created a masters piece.
Give us the tools to build. Or for me you can just give me some clay and Ill let my hands be the tools with my mind as the guide. See, Wealthy Affiliate for me is my blank canvass with every tool associated with it. Instead of just a number 2 pencil. I have colored pencils, water colored markers, rulers of every definition and my imagination as the guide. This is how a introvert can work inside of an extrovert world. This is how you can over come the fear of rejection.
- Boldness first, I AM NOT YOUR SLAVE. Be wise in everything but put away the fear.
- Wisdom second, I got a brain and my own smarts. Know and Trust your own Mind
- Third, set yourself inside a pool of positive flow. If you cannot then create your own. Be your on generator of positive energy inside of a negative world.
- Four, take a leap of faith. If all of your doing right has gotten you this far and you are still unsure but what lies behind the door. The only thing left to do is open the door. Like I did.
I wrote this for a friend on here who said that they were an introvert and was scared of what others thought of 'em. Well all of your doing right lead you here. All you need do is trust yourself. Gather up some courage and open the door. Trust your mind my dear friend.
Yours truly,
Ms. Kida
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Very nice read ms Kida, I agree one should not fear what others think of them, but should be respectful of the similarity as well as the differences.
Thanks. I wrote it for some one new here. Just to show them my experience and how I handled it. You don't have to be loud and crazy. You can do something quiet that makes a statement...that isn't illegal or would get you fire. That's why I said you have to use wisdom in all sitautions