Go Away Negativity!
I often find that I'm overly critical of myself. I tell myself that because I mess up from time to time, I'm not good enough or that I'm damaged goods. Not everyone gets stuck in this mentality, so for those of you who are good at avoiding negative self-talk, please comment and tell us what you do to fight it!
Some of us tend to focus on the negative aspects of ourselves more than the positive ones. This actually can be the result of how we grew up or people we choose to hangout with. If you grow up in an environment where you are constantly being criticized by those around you, then your brain becomes wired to criticize yourself a lot of the time. If you have friends who are overly conscious of appearance and constantly comment on how others eat, talk, dress, etc., then you probably will start being overly conscious of your own appearance and think negatively toward yourself.
In my own life, it has been difficult to retrain my brain to think more positively about myself. When I disappoint others or myself, can't get my hair or makeup how I want it, or talk in my child-like voice I often talk in, I automatically begin the negative self-talk. If you can relate, you probably are familiar with the frustration. You want to love all parts of yourself, but feel powerless to accomplish that love.
When you’re struggling with negative self-talk maybe try going for a walk, journaling, listening to positive music in your car, deep controlled breaths before/during a meeting or while writing your next blog/website post, or whatever else you feel would help you relax and ease your mind (only use healthy things though: no alcohol or drugs). Alcohol/drugs only make the negative self-talk cycle repeat and repeat!
Maybe you need to get some new friends, or maybe you need to consider how people at your job are affecting your attitude toward yourself. Lots of things or people can be the root cause of our negative self-talk.
Today and every day, do your best to accept those parts of you that you like less. Say, "Hey there things I don't like about myself... I understand you're part of me, but I'm going to focus on the good parts of me right now. Have a nice day!"
Personally, I write 5 positive statements about myself on my bathroom mirror and I make myself read them aloud when I wake up each morning. If you do this, say the statements with CONVICTION. Place your feet firmly on the ground, contract your abdominal muscles, pull your shoulders back and firmly place your hands on your hips. This helps me:)
In every moment we have a chance to change our perspective into a positive one and we can use healthy tools to help us get in that more positive mindset. I hope you can discover your POSITIVE self, because each moment and day is a gift and a chance to start over.
Recent Comments
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Hi Paiton, it can be so easy to slip into the negative self-talk at times, especially if we are driven and self-expectations are high. Some of the pressure valves can be accepting that you are not going to get it right all of the time and I think reaching that point where we are not that concerned with what others think about either us or the things that we do.
Both of those things can be really empowering, the strange thing is that we are all in the same boat and if we stop and observe we are not actually in the minority, creating that super positivity can be a work in progress and a never-ending journey and it all starts with us.
Best wishes look like you have some really good strategies in place.
Thank you for your feedback. I agree with you and appreciate your post. We all are probably more similar than we think. We can benefit from being open with one another and sharing our personal experiences.
One of the best ways to grow.