Progress Check-in

bypaisleyposys

114 followers

4 years ago

Crashing Halt

Hello,

It has been approximately 3 weeks since I have registered here at Wealthy Affiliates and I can't say enough about the feeling of the most caring and eager to help genuinely through and through friendliest family oriented people I have ever met. Wow, what a mouthful that was. I urgently had to express my thanks to all of you before this blog continues into my title. I am not giving up, that is not in my vocabulary unless it's a bad relationship.

OK, I have a horrible problem asking for help. I am the oldest out of 8 and have always been there for everyone, plus I am very competitive and my pride is definitely getting in the way. Always thinking I can do anything without any help ever. Yeah, I hate it and it is not very becoming of anyone to be that way. I have be living for the past 10 years, taking care of my son, the mortgage, all the bills, all house work inside and out, any repairs to the house and so on, by myself. Very little support money, not that I was not grateful for the bit. I am getting older and it is getting a little easier to ask for help if I really, really can't figure it out myself or want to make sure that it was done correctly. I also have another little problem that has to do with my working area and space. It tends to get crowded at times or I am being watched. Observed, like if someone is standing behind you when you are working, watched. It would not matter who it was, I have never done well with someone that watches what I was doing as I am doing it.

Anyway, I am not an excuse maker and I make it a point that I don't blame. Sometimes, though, it comes down to where if you want to succeed you have to ask for help. And like the decision to join this Affiliate was a great one, I know when I do ask for help it will be the right decision again. Because, truth be known, I want this journey to be a success so bad it has me spending almost all of my waking hours working on it. For me, everything has to be done as of yesterday and there is never enough time in a day. As everyone knows, that is a one way road to burning out and losing the ambition. So now I come to know that I have to walk away and take a breather. Stop letting all of my normal routines be ignored and get my chores and usual stuff done. And the main thing, get a job. I have been unemployed for a while and now getting scared because of no money coming in. My son moved out to his dad's and that alone has put me in a world I was not expecting to be in for a few more years. I don't want to go back to the old grind but I have faced the truth that if I want this to be a success, I have to take my time and soak all of this fantastic information in at a pace I can retain it, not like I am in a competition with myself.

Like my blossoming niche will be a beautiful garden one day, I will have to give it time to grow. But in the mean time, I will be explaining what I seem to be having trouble with and asking for help to get me through it. There will be no fear in me either, when the time comes to ask for help. All thanks to this amazing, generous, very informative, eager to help group of teachers.

Everything was going so well, regardless of the grey hairs popping out. The website, the training, life; but then I got to the part of Framework and it seems as though I had chosen the wrong theme. (another of my flaws, have to be different). The theme I had chosen worked up until this part, where we are now inserting the privacy policy and the about me page and post. These were to be on the top menu and the theme I had chosen didn't have a top menu, it had a Category drop down around the area the menu was supposed to be. It also had a menu or drop down on the right side, which was not going to work in my mind. So what happens? I panic and start trying to "fix" the problem. Well the problem was I thought I knew what I was doing but I very well didn't and when I realized it, I just decided to make another one quick to keep up the pace and hopefully get it right this time. But I did not take my time and I believe that I now have 2 websites that are unfinished and sitting idle because of my stubborn and over zealous attitude. Humble time. But before my distress signal goes out, there is one thing that I would like to try to if that does not work then my very next steppin-up is to ask for help with the full intention of helping as many as I can in the future.

OK, now it is out and I feel a lot lighter with that load off. I am going to slow down a bit and give this foundation the attention it deserves and that I will deserve in the near future, with the help of a lot of prayers.

Thank you for reading.

Keeping faith,

Dianna