Re-write Your Programming!
How to stop sabotaging ourselves and program for a better future.
The vicious cycle of self-recrimination:
Whereas most of us will agree that our ‘issues’ stem from the negative influences in our past, few are aware of how the process works, and even fewer of our active part in it. Unfortunately, we are taught to take whatever we hear about ourselves as truths, often regardless of their origins, and do not understand that we are just as responsible for those ‘issues’ that run our reactions, and therefore, our lives.
This is how it works:
1) We commit an action we know is wrong, or we ‘fail’ to live up to our desired result. This is followed by one of two types of evaluation of our performance, often both: self-evaluation or that of others. Too often we hear things like “That was terrible,” or, “What’s wrong with you?” or, “I’m so disappointed in you,” etc.
2) These comments are then reinforced by our internal self-recriminations, such as, “He’s right; that was awful,” or, “How could I be so dumb,” or, “I can’t do anything right.”
3) These thoughts, coming from ourselves, are even more effective in establishing our ‘truths’ about our self-image, especially when said within the context of powerful emotions.
4) These self-image truths, whether true or not, are now true to us, and will guide us towards our actions in the future, as we need to justify these beliefs by living up (or down) to them, which in turn, reinforce those ‘truths’ so that we may remain correct in our self-evaluations. Unfortunately, until we become conscious of this nasty little trick, perpetrated on us by our insecure egos, its opinions of ourselves are all we seem to have, and heaven forbid we be proven wrong about how we think of ourselves, and have to reevaluate ourselves from scratch, as this would place the responsibility of our performance entirely upon our own shoulders.
So, for those who DO wish to take control and better themselves, how do we stop this from happening, and more importantly, how can we repair the damage already done?
First, we MUST become conscious of what we are doing at the moment we’re doing it, much like catching a child or a pet in the act. To this end, may I suggest a little trick that I discovered which has ALWAYS WORKED for me, and will ALWAYS WORK for you, given that you commit to it.
Find a medium-thick rubber band that is just slightly loose on your wrist. Commit to wearing it for a period of time that is appropriate to the importance and difficulty you feel about your desired change. If you want to stop swearing, it might be four to seven days. If it’s a truth about yourself that runs deep, like, “I don’t deserve to have a lot of money,” it may take a while longer. There can’t be a pre-designated amount of time simply because there are just too many variables involved. You’ll know when you are ‘re-programmed’ sufficiently.
Whenever you catch yourself committing the offend action and/or thought, you must immediately pull that bad boy back and snap out a distraction. At first this is going to seem like punishment, but if you are objective enough you will soon see it for what it is: distraction. You cannot allow yourself to persist in your action and/or thought, and the pain will draw you attention elsewhere.
Immediately following the ‘snap’, or even during it, you need negate your action with a statement that releases you from believing it, such as, “I am NOT that way!” (ugly, stupid, fat, a failure, whatever the case may be.) If your fingers are stuck in a pie, you might say, “I do NOT NEED to eat this!” If you’re reluctant to go back to the gym, you could say, “I DON’T CARE how I look right now, because it’s not who I am!”or, “I DON’T CARE how much discomfort I have to go through, because I’m not that weak!” What you’re trying to do is to negate the power your fear has had over you.
Secondly, understand that negating your past beliefs will not get rid of them, completely. Like a computer memory drive, simply pushing the ‘delete’ button on a file will not remove it from the hard drive, but will only remove the computer’s access to it, much like erasing the chapter’s reference from the Table of Contents, without actually erasing the chapter. The only real way of destroying the pre-existing programming is to WRITE OVER IT. Therefore, when the mind tries to determine what to do in this situation, there are new instructions to rely on, and will not have to fall back on the previous negative instructions (this is why only saying, "I'm not a smoker." doesn't work). As such, once the negating statements of the previous beliefs have been affirmed, new thoughts must be introduced, such as, “I AM capable of doing that,” or, “I AM beautiful, strong, intelligent, self-disciplined, and next time I will do it better!” Doing so gives your mind those new instructions it needs to relate to the circumstances. Obviously, the more you do this the better the result will be.
As well, additional affirmations in the form of visualizing the desired outcome and your role in it are extremely helpful as they offer an idea of what to look for, much like having an idea of what kind of car you wish to buy before going out to shop. Try to 'feel' the positive emotion you expect to have were this outcome true already. Emotions are energy, and through the balance that the universe must maintain, your positive energy outward will create a path of positive energy back to you.
Take one simple bad habit and subject it to these three responses, and if you’re committed to its demise (and NOT the validity of your ego’s opinion of yourself,) you will succeed. Some re-programming will take longer, but given time, commitment, and the right training, anything can be changed.
Just ask the guy who laughed himself out of cancer.
But, again, it’s entirely up to you.
Light, love, and the strength to be more.
Michael B.
Recent Comments
3
Very good advice Michael! We need to realise what a powerful tool our mind is and use it correctly!
Thank you for the nice words, Theos.