I Recently Found out I am a Woman

byNuggetz

769 followers

2 years ago

Hi there folks,

Well I figured that its high time i had an update and thought i'd write a quick blog post here. Its been a couple of months since i spent any serious amount of time on here which is very naughty of me I know. But hope to get back into the swing of things again.

Well, I recently come out as Transgender to my Girlfriend and Parent, the two parties who were my biggest hurdle. I dont really care about what anyone else thinks, but these both parties were the ones I did worry about, for many years it would appear.

It started off when I decided to do some research on Transgender struggles and hormone effects to etter understand my girlfriend who is Trans also. As a result I found myself.

When i started watching YouTube videos and reading articles and audiobooks that went into Trans history and i| begn to learn jusyt how much Transsexual women and men have been marginalised over the course of history, but more shockingly over recent decades. The more i read the more it infuriated me and made me thirsty for more knowledge. I really just wanted to grab the world and say "Look at whats going on! This isnt right! Nobody deserves to be treated this way!".

Id always considered myself liberal minded and with my finger on the pulse on many social issues. But this had seemed to escape me all my life. I really couldnt eleive it. I just got hungrier and hungrier for knowledge so carried on my research

Anyway, one video led to another and I ended up finding myself listening to the experiences of Trans women who had transitioned at a later age like myself and was amazed at how many similarities i saw etween them and myself. Here I was trying etter to understand my irlfriend and finding myself instead.

This came as no major shock to be honst as i'd liked to dress upp in the past. I'd never ventured out in public, ut had met other TVs and Crossdressers in private in the past when i was going through a different stage of self discovery discovering my sexuality.. But whenever I grew more confidence to go out to social events, I'd end up meeting a girl and getting into a relationship and acting the Straight alpha male again.

But inside this wqs making me seriously unhappy and i didnt know why., and this unhappiness would manifest itself in ugly ways. I was seriously unhappy and possibly even on a road to self destruction. But since discovering myself, everything has just seemed to fall into place and i feel so much happier already.

When I realised that i am actually transgender, I realised that i could no longer deny myself. So I hatched a plan that I would get my head down and work hard for the next year and save up so I can just move away and live somewhere far far away and start afresh as a woman. just like in the fairytaes.

Well, this lasted for about a week, then i decided that there was no way was i hiding any more. Everything i'd een learning had just taught me that i had already wasted too much of my life which is far too short. No more. I'd been brought up in a very intolerant and judgemental fmily who are still very intolerant, or at least my parents are. I also feared telling my Girlfriend as i feared that she would no longer want to be with me if I was Trans like her.

So, I decided the best idea, while the iron was hot was to get the bull by the horns and strike. So I told my girlfreind who dumped me immediately. So I then told my parents. Now it was done. No need to worry anymore. Even if they turn out to hate me, the worry of telling them had gone forever.

Since then i have never felt better and so much happier and healthier. My Ex Girlfriend has actually been very supportive and been good to alk to her on the phone regularly chatting about it all.

What Next?

So now that I know where my life is going, at the age of 42, I have a lot of old habits that are repulsively msculine to me now and cringe to hear my voice sometimes. I have also been letting a lot of emotions run their own course too. In the past i never cried. That was for girls as far as i was concerned and real men dont cry. But i was never a real man anyway. So I always stifled emotion with anger and im an emotional person. So as a result i was living in a rage contantly. Letting my emotions free has made me feel so much healthier.

So now i'm learning how to adapt into my everyday life. As a singer, ive alwyas had the ability to boom a room out through years of singing without a Microphone over the top of a bar room full of drun tourists. This voice power is good for sining,especially folk music, but not the best voice for feminisation. So that'll be a challenge.

I also want to try and incorporate all the work ive done on my websitews into my new author name. I have however started my own blog where i plan to document my transition as i feel like i owe that at least to the world cos thats how i found myself.

So, if you'd like to keep up with me, you can follow me at;