The Struggle Stays Real
One of my biggest struggles that I deal with on a day to day basis is living with Bipolar II disorder. Bipolar II disorder differs from the "traditional" or more stereotyped Bipolar I disorder in that you have more frequent, extreme lows, and your mania looks more like an extremely productive, normal day. So, just juggling the normal stresses of day to day life (especially without medication since I lost my insurance 7 years ago) is an accomplishment, and when my lows are going full swing, getting out of bed to feed my dogs is an accomplishment.
Today I got hit with some pretty impactful, stressing news, and I am trying so hard not to let it take me to a bad spot, but its getting there. I knew I had to move out of the place I live by the end of the month but foolish me, I thought my roommate (whose brother is on the lease) was leaving with me and that I would be able to get back in the house and rent. I'm already approved through the property management company, the neighbors love me and my dog (they actually hate my roommate, especially his dog), I just thought it was going to work out.
Turns out he's not leaving, he just wanted me out, and instead of being a mature adult about things and just saying I don't think we click as roommates, its not working out, he was like let's move out because its too expensive! On top of all this, I found out he has also been screwing me out of an extra $300 a month for rent. I hate myself for ever believing in the golden rule (treat others how you want to be treated) because if there's anything the world's shown me it's that you will get real fucked up going through life thinking people have the same heart as you. There it is, some of the lows coming out.
I don't know why I decided to post this on here. I just needed to get it out of me, and Wealthy Affiliate has been an incredibly positive community....I just need some positivity in my life right now because all this stupid yet significant bullshit combined with my brains inability to stay positive (or not screw up my life when it's disguised as positivity) is making it impossible for me to "keep on the sunny side". So, if you've read all this, thank you for taking the time to. Sorry for venting, the struggle just gets a little too real to hold back sometimes.
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I don't have bi polar disorders but I am a recovering addict and I know struggles mentally can be tough been there. For people venting like yo u did it takes guts and courage. also prevents you from going over the edge. You will get through this I promise.
I am sorry that this has happened to you. What an unfortunate circumstance. While I don't know what living with Bipolar Disorder is like first hand, I do have lots of experience working in the Mental Health and Addictions field, and understand the challenges that come with it quite well.
If you needed to vent, and get it off your chest, and you found this was the place to do it then Cheers to you! Everything will work out - even if it doesn't seem like it right now.
Do you really want to be living with someone like that anyways?
Feel free to message me anytime if you want to talk :)
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Molly, Sounds like you are really having a tuff time at making a go of living a contented life and all I can say is to hang in there. When you think you're at the lowest point in your life, just remember, the only way for you to go is UP.
Getting it off your chest and venting is like the first step to making things right all the way around. Keep your chin up and keep on keeping on. You have plenty of friends here at Wealthy Affiliate.