Let me know what you think - about page for my new website -not built yet
here is the about page that will be for my new site.... as this is addressing Widows...
How long have you been doing what you do, and how did you become The Happy Even After Coach?
To answer this question, it’s probably best that I share with you a defining moment, and a resulting “compelling story” that brought me to where I am today – guiding widows like you on exactly what to do to break through the sorrow, get their lives back in balance, and find happiness again.
That defining moment in my life happened in March of 2016.That’s the day my life changed forever.
I remember it like it was yesterday, I can still feel my heart sink as I heard those words on the phone, are you sitting down? Scotty has pancreatic cancer. And it doesn’t look good.Would you like to tell him or would you like me to? That was the conversation I had on the phone with our alternative doctor.
I felt like I was hit by a Mack truck when she told me “Scotty has stage 4 pancreatic cancer.” I felt like I was hit by the trailer of that truck when I had to tell him.
I have been through a lot in my life, more than then I have room to share here but, this has been the most painful experience I have had to go through in my life. I can honestly say 2016 was the worst year of my life.
I found myself sleeping in the hallway between our room and Billie’s room. Billie was my 92 year old wonderful father-in law who we were the care takers of. I lost my husband Billie within 3 months of each other. If that wasn’t enough, I also lost 2 friends to cancer and 2 relatives going thru cancer treatments.One of my closest friends had to put her 16 year old companion dog down and I was there for her as well.
I closed my healing arts center down to be with him, and care for him. I was by his side 24/7. It was a lot, but I will never regret spending that time with him. He passed away on August 16th, 5 months after his diagnosis.
A lot of people will compare losing a spouse to losing a parent. But when you lose a parent, you lose your past. Losing your spouse is losing your future, the plans that you made for both of you for the rest of your lives. My son came out to help, and was asking” what he could do?” “What should be sold?”when I was standing in Scotty
s favorite place, his garage. I had the clarity that this wasn’t a divorce, and I didn’t want any of it gone. I changed the locks on all the doors, and closed off all the windows of garage, I didn’t want to see it and I didn’t want others to look in. Everyone seemed urgent to help me part with things or move on and I wasn’t ready. What I wanted most was to be alone. The only obligations I took on were the time-sensitive stuff I needed to do in order to survive.I needed to allow myself to process how my live just changes in its entirety.
I’ve never been a sad person. I allowed myself to have 2 months of whatever I needed. I could cry as often as I wanted. I didn’t have to answer my phone, I could sleep all day. But after two months, I made the decision to be happy, or at least to star in that direction. I knew I would have terrible moments, but I had to live my life. And when the moments popped up, I would shed my tears and move on. I chose to be active, social, and busy.
But it wasn’t always easy. (And still isn’t) Everyone has an opinion on how I should grieve with facts and figures of how long it would take. Our Church invited me to join a grief share group. I have noticed people don’t know what to say to me. Teary-eyed acquaintances tell me how sorry they were in one breath and ask how I was in the next. “How the f*(%k do you think I am?” Is what I wanted to say. I have had widows tell me it was too early for me to start living my life. “It takes years,” they would say. But I was not about to make mourning my lifestyle. I don’t want that and neither would Scotty.
I knew I needed to return to work, and my experience was in the forefront of my mind. I knew I couldn’t return to the way things were - I had no interest in starting a healing center over from scratch.I was already a life coach, So I started thinking about the experience of losing a spouse – how different it is and how misunderstood. About all the bad advice I had received and how isolating it could be. I wanted to help other women like me – a lot of them. And I know Scotty would want me to tell our story to help others find the joy again.
I shifted my energy and started teaching other widows how they can do the same: I watched their joy, confidence, and stability return too!
I have since made a commitment to dedicate the rest of my professional life to helping others find their joy and experience life in a fresh new happiness.
Since then, I’ve worked with many private clients, spoken in front of countless groups: I live my dream of helping others, with the freedom to travel the world;
Recent Comments
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Wow, you are truly inspiring. Your story has moved me- my father in law recently passed away leaving my young mother in law so I can understand a bit of what you are going through. It is full of ups and downs but good for you that you've gone on to make a life for yourself. I wish you all the best and that your business should be a success:)
Thank you so much, Best regards to your young mother in law, if I can help in any just let me know, I just started a Positive facebook page and group if she is interested in some positive elp, and a safe place to share and be encouraged -- if she is interested I can share the links with you,,,
Have a joyful evening,,,
Thanks! She's currently not on facebook but if that changes I'll let you know:)