Roadblocks

bylaurieatg

327 followers

Updated 9 years ago

It seems as if life keeps throwing roadblocks or challenges for me to actually utilizing Wealthy Affiliate, or for that matter getting online, or even communicating by cell phone. The internet seems to have grown progressively worse at home... rarely, allowing me to connect and actually do anything. Often times, my work is lost if I do not do it elsewhere and transfer it to the web, a better practice truly. It might even help me edit my work better. Perhaps, a practice I should implement.

I have been unable to progress with the training at this time because of the lack of bandwidth, which is keeping me from getting on and interacting with the community regularly, I am starting to wonder if I should keep up my wealthy affiliate membership because I can't do the training much less interact regularly with the community. Perhaps, a sign there's something else to do? We will see we are working hard as a household and a community to find solutions. Sure, there's going to town and finding somewhere to get online but closest probable place is over 70 miles round trip and I'm not making any money at this yet.

On top of that, I have hit a real roadblock since my little brother's death. It's hard for me to really commit to anything. Meaning is challenged. I know I am still living but this is in context with the rest of my life. With ongoing challenges on the home front, including my husband not wanting to do anything else to commit to finishing the building process instead he wants to play, make pens and seam rippers or coffee scoops and boxes to sell. Forget the home, I have two nice spaces- a shop and an office. I don't even have a quiet space to go do anything at this point, my life is full of interruptions.

We've had flooding issues and the universe has asked me to spend my time digging, to fix the landscape to overcome bad planning in the building process that has us with flooding issues in the first place. It's been a challenge building, and doing so with someone who sees every challenge as an obstacle to big to overcome. I'm tired. Yet I need to do this to build the oasis I dreamed of, unless I want to take that off my to-do list.

I am frustrated, tired, lost and roadblocks seem to be a thing I keep encountering. It indicates to me I am missing the flow somehow, perhaps that's why I am being flooded. Damming things up for too long, getting the reservoir to full things are bound to burst. The weight is heavy I am tired.

I'll give it awhile and hope things open up, as I really like wealthy affiliate and my blog topics, so I enjoy the work as well. Things seem closed now, even writing, I'm not as creative as I used to be but that is now. Time will help that. Wait and find stillness so that the way can open.

Anyone rich enough and innovative enough that they want to start a telecommunications company in the middle of nowhere and bring reliable solutions to those of us off the beaten path?

I think the weight of the last couple of years is piling up, perhaps the digging is symbolically me digging myself out of it and I need the physical activity and that's why the other challenges. Either way, I keep putting one foot in front of another and know that if I'm still here there's a reason, the rest of it... in the end won't matter as long as I keep that inner flame and spirit alive.

Thank you for enduring my rambling.

May you walk in the beauty way.