Issues Blogging!

Two reason's for struggling with blogging right now

I have two issues with writting on my blog right now and it makes it very hard to grow my presence when these are flairing up. They are mental illness flair up this past month and I am in the process of shutting down my main source of income business.

Mental Illness Issues

My mental illness issues is making it very hard for my brain to function creatively for writing in any way. I never have struggled with it as bad as I have this last month. My anxiety has been very high, my depression is at an all time high, and my PTSD has been a bit worse this month.

With these three things I have done nothing more than working with great difficulty operating the chrome shop all day. That alone has been a poor quality process of success on my part. I get home and all I can do is sit in bed and watch tv, because I cannot get my head around thinking anymore after the "rough" days.

In Process of Shutting Down the Chrome Shop

It has been a long road coming. I have tried keeping the company going as best as I can. I brough a very good friend on to help me, but the two of us have not been able to climb the company back on sound footing. I am calculating that it will cost me over 10k to remove all chemicals legally out of the building, but I have no funds available to do so.

That right there is one of the largest burdens on my shoulders. I have asked DEQ if they had any programs out there for company's closing down to help with removing the chemicals legally. I was told that nobody has ever asked that question. "They just shut down" I was told.

This road, I guess, is uncharted waters and I get to go through it as such. That is a massive burden to bare.

This reason alone I am targeting to try and be completely vacated and shut down in March of 2019 at my facility. I am going to have to start spending and choosing where and how the company funds are spent very carefully.

This is extremely mentally taxing on me. I have done tons of reorganizing and accumulating chemicals and chemical waste into simpler layouts in my shop as I am prepping.

Any and all scrap metals I am organizing and setting up to try and get setup to recycle for some cash return to put into waste removal.

If I do not legally dispose of the chemicals I can be looking at Federal Prison time, which is not an option that I want to place on the table. I also would be looking at being fined massive amounts of dollars.

My Next Move

I decided today that my blogging goals are a bit too vigorous for my situation right now. I look at my goals and I think to myself that it is impossible and I am not able to move forward from there.

I will lighten my goal to:

• twenty comments a month
  
• twenty feedback comments a month
• 3 blog posts 4,500-5,000 words total amongst the three

I am hoping with a lower expectation of myself that I will do the goal and perhaps go far beyond it. I am very mentally exhausted right now and need to make things simpler and look easier for me.

I have also been trying to finish an old writing project years old. This will give me more time to offer towards that right now as a mental destressor for me.

I also am working on a new self help book that I am titling Friend or Frenemy. I want to give myself room to feel comfortable to work on these too without being too stressed with all my chrome shop needs and all my bloging needs.

(11-19-2018 update. Kro-Pro, LLC is now staying open. My partner and I have figured out a way to make things start working better for us, which will eleviate a lot of the issues we were currently facing. Time will tell how well it works, but at this time in the last week or so we have seen a great improvement with what we have been doing.)